Silas
Beloved of All
Thank you for opening your heart about this painful situation with your husband's family. It hurts deeply to feel disliked and to face strange or confusing behavior when you try to be part of the family, and it is understandable that you have been asking God to reveal what is happening.
God sees what you are carrying and He hears your prayer for understanding. Jesus Himself knows what it is to be misunderstood and rejected by His own family. Scripture tells us that He was not honored in His own country and among His own relatives, and at one time even His brothers thought He had lost His senses. He understands the sting of family rejection in a personal way, and He is able to comfort you and give you wisdom as you walk through this.
As you have been praying for revelation, it helps to remember what God has already revealed about our hearts and how He wants us to live. The law of God is not sin, but it shows us what sin is. It is spiritual and reaches to the heart and mind, not only to outward actions. In the Sermon on the Mount Jesus showed that God looks at the heart, while the religious leaders of His day were content to keep the outward letter and miss the deeper intent. When we see the law in its spiritual depth, we realize we cannot keep it perfectly on our own. The law can only condemn and show us where we fall short. It has no power in itself to make us righteous.
That is why the good news is so precious. The law was like a tutor to lead us to Christ. In the fullness of time God sent His Son, born under the law, who kept the law perfectly in order to redeem those who were under it. Through His death and resurrection we have died with Christ and been raised to new life. Now we are delivered from trying to relate to God on the basis of keeping rules, and we are brought into adoption as His children. We serve not in the old way of the letter, but in newness of the Spirit and in the new life we have in Christ. We are no longer under the law but under grace.
Even as we delight in God's law in our inner being and want what is good and holy, we still feel a war within. There is a struggle between what we desire in our hearts to do for God and the weakness of our flesh. That tension does not mean you are failing. It is part of living in this present life while learning to walk by the Spirit.
This world is full of conflict between peoples and within families, and the gospel brings the promise of peace with God for those who have been at war with Him. When that peace rules in our hearts, it changes how we respond to conflict around us. We do not have to try to earn the approval of others by flawless performance, as if keeping every expectation perfectly would make us accepted. Instead we can live by grace, trusting Christ's work for us, and let the Spirit produce love, patience and gentleness in us.
Sometimes the closest fellowship we feel is not with blood relatives but with those who share faith in Christ, and that is a reality Jesus spoke about when He said those who do the will of God are His true family. This does not mean we turn away from family, but it helps explain why the distance you feel can be so painful when faith or values are not shared.
As you continue to pray, ask God not only to show you what is hidden, but to give you wisdom for how to respond in love and truth. He often reveals what we need to know in His timing, and He always gives grace to walk faithfully with what He has already shown. You can pray for your husband as well, that you both may be united and show consistent love, and pray for your in-laws that God would work in their hearts and draw them to Himself. Where behavior is strange or hurtful, it is right to set healthy and respectful boundaries while still choosing forgiveness and refusing to repay unkindness with unkindness.
May the Lord give you discernment, protect your marriage, and guard your heart with His peace. May He help you to delight in His ways inwardly and to walk by His Spirit daily, trusting that He who fulfilled the law for you will also equip you to love well in this difficult place.
Father, I lift this daughter to You and ask that You surround her with Your presence. Reveal what needs to be revealed according to Your wisdom, and give her clarity, strength and peace. Help her and her husband to walk in unity and grace, to serve You in newness of life, and to show Your love even when it is not returned. Work in the hearts of her husband's family, bring healing where there is hurt, and let Your peace rule in this home. In Jesus' name, amen.
God sees what you are carrying and He hears your prayer for understanding. Jesus Himself knows what it is to be misunderstood and rejected by His own family. Scripture tells us that He was not honored in His own country and among His own relatives, and at one time even His brothers thought He had lost His senses. He understands the sting of family rejection in a personal way, and He is able to comfort you and give you wisdom as you walk through this.
As you have been praying for revelation, it helps to remember what God has already revealed about our hearts and how He wants us to live. The law of God is not sin, but it shows us what sin is. It is spiritual and reaches to the heart and mind, not only to outward actions. In the Sermon on the Mount Jesus showed that God looks at the heart, while the religious leaders of His day were content to keep the outward letter and miss the deeper intent. When we see the law in its spiritual depth, we realize we cannot keep it perfectly on our own. The law can only condemn and show us where we fall short. It has no power in itself to make us righteous.
That is why the good news is so precious. The law was like a tutor to lead us to Christ. In the fullness of time God sent His Son, born under the law, who kept the law perfectly in order to redeem those who were under it. Through His death and resurrection we have died with Christ and been raised to new life. Now we are delivered from trying to relate to God on the basis of keeping rules, and we are brought into adoption as His children. We serve not in the old way of the letter, but in newness of the Spirit and in the new life we have in Christ. We are no longer under the law but under grace.
Even as we delight in God's law in our inner being and want what is good and holy, we still feel a war within. There is a struggle between what we desire in our hearts to do for God and the weakness of our flesh. That tension does not mean you are failing. It is part of living in this present life while learning to walk by the Spirit.
This world is full of conflict between peoples and within families, and the gospel brings the promise of peace with God for those who have been at war with Him. When that peace rules in our hearts, it changes how we respond to conflict around us. We do not have to try to earn the approval of others by flawless performance, as if keeping every expectation perfectly would make us accepted. Instead we can live by grace, trusting Christ's work for us, and let the Spirit produce love, patience and gentleness in us.
Sometimes the closest fellowship we feel is not with blood relatives but with those who share faith in Christ, and that is a reality Jesus spoke about when He said those who do the will of God are His true family. This does not mean we turn away from family, but it helps explain why the distance you feel can be so painful when faith or values are not shared.
As you continue to pray, ask God not only to show you what is hidden, but to give you wisdom for how to respond in love and truth. He often reveals what we need to know in His timing, and He always gives grace to walk faithfully with what He has already shown. You can pray for your husband as well, that you both may be united and show consistent love, and pray for your in-laws that God would work in their hearts and draw them to Himself. Where behavior is strange or hurtful, it is right to set healthy and respectful boundaries while still choosing forgiveness and refusing to repay unkindness with unkindness.
May the Lord give you discernment, protect your marriage, and guard your heart with His peace. May He help you to delight in His ways inwardly and to walk by His Spirit daily, trusting that He who fulfilled the law for you will also equip you to love well in this difficult place.
Father, I lift this daughter to You and ask that You surround her with Your presence. Reveal what needs to be revealed according to Your wisdom, and give her clarity, strength and peace. Help her and her husband to walk in unity and grace, to serve You in newness of life, and to show Your love even when it is not returned. Work in the hearts of her husband's family, bring healing where there is hurt, and let Your peace rule in this home. In Jesus' name, amen.
