We have read your request and we hear the deep pain and sorrow in your heart, and we are praying with you and for you right now in Jesus' name. We grieve with you over the hurt you have caused and the loneliness and rejection you feel, and we want you to know that you are not alone and you are not without hope, even when it feels that way.
The Lord sees your broken heart and your repentant spirit. The Bible tells us The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit Psalm 34:18. He also promises Fear not, for I am with you. Don’t be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you. Yes, I will help you. Yes, I will uphold you with the right hand of my righteousness Isaiah 41:10. Even when people have turned away or when you feel you have lost everyone, God has not left you. He says I will never leave you nor forsake you Hebrews 13:5.
We also hear your cry Please forgive me of my sins, and we want to share the most important truth with you. You did not mention the name of Jesus Christ in your request, and we want to lovingly tell you that it is only through Jesus that we have access to God and forgiveness. Jesus said I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me John 14:6, and There is salvation in none other, for neither is there any other name under heaven, that is given among men, by which we must be saved Acts 4:12. Your sorrow over sin is a step toward God, and His promise is If we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous to forgive us the sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness 1 John 1:9. If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved Romans 10:9. We encourage you to place your trust fully in Jesus Christ, to confess your sins to Him, to ask Him to be Lord of your life, and to receive His forgiveness which is complete, for as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us Psalm 103:12.
We want to gently correct the way you are speaking about yourself. You say you hate your life and that no one wants you as you are and that they deserve better than you. We understand that guilt and shame feel overwhelming, but God does not want you to live in self hatred. You are made in His image and you are fearfully and wonderfully made Psalm 139:14, and He has a purpose for your life. For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works Ephesians 2:10. He heals the broken in heart, and binds up their wounds Psalm 147:3. Your life has value because God gave it and because Jesus died for you. Nothing you have done puts you beyond His love and mercy when you come to Him in repentance, for neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing will be able to separate us from God's love which is in Christ Jesus our Lord Romans 8:38-39.
We also hear your prayer for those you have hurt, that they would live a good life and that they would forgive you. That is a right and loving prayer. We pray with you for them, and we also pray that you would experience God's forgiveness first, and then trust Him with whether and when others forgive. True repentance may include seeking to make amends where possible and with humility, but we leave the outcome in God's hands and we pray for His healing for all involved.
We pray together now for you.
Father in heaven, we come before You in the name of Jesus Christ and we lift up this dear one who is crushed and lonely and full of sorrow. Lord, we ask You to forgive their sins as they confess them to You, to wash them clean by the blood of Jesus, and to give them assurance of Your forgiveness and salvation. Lord, comfort their broken heart, take away the overwhelming pain, and replace self hatred with Your love and truth. Help them to know they are not alone, that You are near, and that You have a purpose for their life. Give them hope for the future, for You have said For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you hope and a future Jeremiah 29:11. Lord, we also pray for those they have hurt, that You would bless them, heal them, and bring forgiveness and peace as You will. Lead this dear one to a Bible believing church and to caring believers who can walk with them, encourage them, and help them grow in You. Hold them close when they feel abandoned, and help them to daily turn to Jesus. In Jesus' name we pray, amen.
We encourage you to keep crying out to Jesus, to read His Word daily, and to reach out to a trusted pastor or mature Christian believer near you who can support you in person. If the pain feels unbearable, please do not stay alone, reach out right away to someone you trust. God loves you more than you know and He wants you to live and to find new life in Him.