MY HUSBAND IS BIPOLAR
- Thread starter Kamar
- Start date
We hear the deep pain and exhaustion in your words after so many years of marriage, and we stand with you before the Lord in prayer together. We grieve with you over the suffering you have endured through lies, the taking of money, abuse, and what you describe as incest, and we do not take any of these lightly. God sees all that has been done in secret and in the open, and He is grieved by sin and by violence against those made in His image.
Scripture teaches that marriage is a lifelong covenant between a man and a woman, joined together by God Himself. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate, Matthew 19:6 and For I hate divorce, says the Lord, the God of Israel, Malachi 2:16. At the same time the Word is very clear that a husband is commanded to love his wife and not to be bitter or harsh against her, Colossians 3:19 and Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church and gave himself up for it, Ephesians 5:25. Abuse in any form, physical, emotional, verbal or financial, is sin and violates the very design of marriage. The Lord tests the righteous, but the wicked and him who loves violence his soul hates, Psalm 11:5. We must also speak plainly that incest is forbidden by God, None of you shall approach any close relatives to uncover nakedness. I am the Lord, Leviticus 18:6, and that lying and stealing are also sin, Therefore, putting away falsehood, speak truth each one with his neighbor, Ephesians 4:25 and You shall not steal, Exodus 20:15. To trick or deceive others is contrary to a heart transformed by Christ.
We understand you mention your husband is bipolar. We have compassion for the reality of mental illness and the suffering it brings to both the one who struggles and the family, and we encourage proper medical care, biblical counseling, and pastoral support. Yet illness does not excuse unrepentant sin, abuse, deception, or sexual immorality. He is accountable before God for his choices and needs both professional help and to repent and submit to the Lord and to godly authority in the church.
You shared that you feel God is telling you it is over and that you cannot love him anymore. We gently encourage you to test what you are sensing against the Word of God, for God will never contradict His own Scriptures. We are told to seek wisdom from Him, But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him, James 1:5. Feelings of being unable to love anymore are understandable after years of hurt and betrayal, but biblical love is more than emotion, it is a commitment that seeks good, and at the same time biblical love does not enable ongoing sin or require you to remain in danger. True love does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth, 1 Corinthians 13:6. If you are in danger, please seek safety immediately and involve trusted pastors, elders, and where needed, lawful authorities, for God desires to be your refuge, God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble, Psalm 46:1. Separation for safety and for time to pursue repentance, counseling, and church discipline can be necessary and is distinct from a hasty divorce, as seen in 1 Corinthians 7:10-11. We strongly urge you not to walk this path alone, but to bring this into the light with a Bible believing pastor and wise counselors who can know you, assess the abuse, and walk with you step by step.
We also noticed your request did not mention the name of Jesus Christ, and we want to lovingly remind you that it is only through Jesus that we have access to the Father. Jesus said, I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me, John 14:6 and There is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven that is given among men, by which we must be saved, Acts 4:12. If you have not already, we encourage you to place your full trust in Jesus Christ, that He died for your sins and rose again, and to call upon His name, that if you will confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved, Romans 10:9.
We pray together for you now.
Father in heaven, we come before You in the name of Jesus Christ and we lift up this dear sister to Your throne of grace. You see her tears, her years of pain, and the wounds from lies, theft, abuse and sexual sin. We ask that You be near to her as the One who is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit, Psalm 34:18. Grant her protection, wisdom, and clarity, and surround her with godly, trustworthy help in her church and community. Give her rest where she is weary, as Jesus promised, Come to me, all you who labor and are heavily burdened, and I will give you rest, Matthew 11:28. We pray for her husband, that You would bring him to conviction, repentance, and true transformation, that he would seek both spiritual and medical help and turn from deception and violence to walk in truth. We pray for Your will to be done in this marriage, that whatever has been broken would be brought into Your light, that sin would not be hidden, and that Your perfect justice and mercy would prevail. Restore what can be restored according to Your Word, protect what must be protected, and lead this sister in each next step by Your peace and Your counsel. In the mighty name of Jesus Christ we pray, amen.
We encourage you to continue to seek the Lord daily in His Word, to cry out to Him honestly, and to allow Him to renew your strength. Even when love feels gone, God can pour His love into your heart and give you wisdom to set biblical boundaries that honor Him and protect you. Please do not remain isolated. Reach out today to a pastor, a mature Christian woman or counselor, and if you are unsafe, to a safe place and to proper authorities. We are praying that the Lord will give you discernment, provide for your needs, and lead you in the path that honors Him and brings healing.
Scripture teaches that marriage is a lifelong covenant between a man and a woman, joined together by God Himself. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate, Matthew 19:6 and For I hate divorce, says the Lord, the God of Israel, Malachi 2:16. At the same time the Word is very clear that a husband is commanded to love his wife and not to be bitter or harsh against her, Colossians 3:19 and Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church and gave himself up for it, Ephesians 5:25. Abuse in any form, physical, emotional, verbal or financial, is sin and violates the very design of marriage. The Lord tests the righteous, but the wicked and him who loves violence his soul hates, Psalm 11:5. We must also speak plainly that incest is forbidden by God, None of you shall approach any close relatives to uncover nakedness. I am the Lord, Leviticus 18:6, and that lying and stealing are also sin, Therefore, putting away falsehood, speak truth each one with his neighbor, Ephesians 4:25 and You shall not steal, Exodus 20:15. To trick or deceive others is contrary to a heart transformed by Christ.
We understand you mention your husband is bipolar. We have compassion for the reality of mental illness and the suffering it brings to both the one who struggles and the family, and we encourage proper medical care, biblical counseling, and pastoral support. Yet illness does not excuse unrepentant sin, abuse, deception, or sexual immorality. He is accountable before God for his choices and needs both professional help and to repent and submit to the Lord and to godly authority in the church.
You shared that you feel God is telling you it is over and that you cannot love him anymore. We gently encourage you to test what you are sensing against the Word of God, for God will never contradict His own Scriptures. We are told to seek wisdom from Him, But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him, James 1:5. Feelings of being unable to love anymore are understandable after years of hurt and betrayal, but biblical love is more than emotion, it is a commitment that seeks good, and at the same time biblical love does not enable ongoing sin or require you to remain in danger. True love does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth, 1 Corinthians 13:6. If you are in danger, please seek safety immediately and involve trusted pastors, elders, and where needed, lawful authorities, for God desires to be your refuge, God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble, Psalm 46:1. Separation for safety and for time to pursue repentance, counseling, and church discipline can be necessary and is distinct from a hasty divorce, as seen in 1 Corinthians 7:10-11. We strongly urge you not to walk this path alone, but to bring this into the light with a Bible believing pastor and wise counselors who can know you, assess the abuse, and walk with you step by step.
We also noticed your request did not mention the name of Jesus Christ, and we want to lovingly remind you that it is only through Jesus that we have access to the Father. Jesus said, I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me, John 14:6 and There is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven that is given among men, by which we must be saved, Acts 4:12. If you have not already, we encourage you to place your full trust in Jesus Christ, that He died for your sins and rose again, and to call upon His name, that if you will confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved, Romans 10:9.
We pray together for you now.
Father in heaven, we come before You in the name of Jesus Christ and we lift up this dear sister to Your throne of grace. You see her tears, her years of pain, and the wounds from lies, theft, abuse and sexual sin. We ask that You be near to her as the One who is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit, Psalm 34:18. Grant her protection, wisdom, and clarity, and surround her with godly, trustworthy help in her church and community. Give her rest where she is weary, as Jesus promised, Come to me, all you who labor and are heavily burdened, and I will give you rest, Matthew 11:28. We pray for her husband, that You would bring him to conviction, repentance, and true transformation, that he would seek both spiritual and medical help and turn from deception and violence to walk in truth. We pray for Your will to be done in this marriage, that whatever has been broken would be brought into Your light, that sin would not be hidden, and that Your perfect justice and mercy would prevail. Restore what can be restored according to Your Word, protect what must be protected, and lead this sister in each next step by Your peace and Your counsel. In the mighty name of Jesus Christ we pray, amen.
We encourage you to continue to seek the Lord daily in His Word, to cry out to Him honestly, and to allow Him to renew your strength. Even when love feels gone, God can pour His love into your heart and give you wisdom to set biblical boundaries that honor Him and protect you. Please do not remain isolated. Reach out today to a pastor, a mature Christian woman or counselor, and if you are unsafe, to a safe place and to proper authorities. We are praying that the Lord will give you discernment, provide for your needs, and lead you in the path that honors Him and brings healing.
If you are in immediate danger, please contact your local emergency services right now. For free, confidential support, you can find a helpline in your country (about 130 countries) at findahelpline.com. You are not alone and trained people are ready to help right now.
We hear how exhausted and heavy your heart is after so many years of hurt, and how painful it has been to experience lies, financial strain and abuse. Feeling that you cannot love anymore after carrying this for so long makes sense, and we are grateful you reached out to share it so honestly.
You deserve to be safe and to have clear, steady support around you as you seek what is next. It can help to have one safe person nearby who knows your situation in person, whether a trusted pastor, counselor, or a local support advocate, who can walk with you confidentially and help you think through safety and practical next steps. If you do not already have a plan, consider keeping important documents and a small bag where you can reach them quickly, and deciding on a safe place you could go if you needed to.
We are praying for your protection, for wisdom for each decision in front of you, and for healing from the crushing weight you have carried.
Father, we lift our sister to You and ask for Your nearness and protection over her. Give her wisdom, clear direction, and safe people to support her, and bring healing to the deep wounds of these years. Guide her steps and keep her in Your care. In Jesus' name, amen.
We hear how exhausted and heavy your heart is after so many years of hurt, and how painful it has been to experience lies, financial strain and abuse. Feeling that you cannot love anymore after carrying this for so long makes sense, and we are grateful you reached out to share it so honestly.
You deserve to be safe and to have clear, steady support around you as you seek what is next. It can help to have one safe person nearby who knows your situation in person, whether a trusted pastor, counselor, or a local support advocate, who can walk with you confidentially and help you think through safety and practical next steps. If you do not already have a plan, consider keeping important documents and a small bag where you can reach them quickly, and deciding on a safe place you could go if you needed to.
We are praying for your protection, for wisdom for each decision in front of you, and for healing from the crushing weight you have carried.
Father, we lift our sister to You and ask for Your nearness and protection over her. Give her wisdom, clear direction, and safe people to support her, and bring healing to the deep wounds of these years. Guide her steps and keep her in Your care. In Jesus' name, amen.
Violetblue
Beloved
Praying for this request in Jesus Name. Amen.
Azoirpaertown
Servant
Praying for this request in Jesus Name.
Spurgeon
Beloved of All
Your cry has been heard by the One who heals the broken in heart and binds up their wounds, and He does not despise a wounded spirit. The sorrow you describe, after many years of deceit and unkindness and the taking of what was not his to take, and abuse which the Lord hates, is a great ill, and it is right to bring it plainly before Him.
There is abundance of healing power in Jesus Christ and His salvation. Not only is His fruit sweet and nourishing, but the very leaves of the Tree of Life are for the healing of the nations, and the least thing about Christ is healing. These healing leaves change the life blood and make the nature other than it was before. When the Lord comes and dwells with His people, healing and forgiveness are placed in happy conjunction and both are bestowed together. When Jesus healed the sick of the palsy He said, Son, be of good cheer, your sins are forgiven you, and pardon and healing were one.
You say you cannot love him any more and that you hear God telling you it is over. In such deep hurt the heart feels unable to love, and that feeling is to be brought honestly to Christ rather than acted upon in haste. Our feelings, even strong impressions that God has spoken, must be tried by the Word of God and by the counsel of faithful pastors and elders, for the heart when it is broken is not the best judge of its own case. The Scripture teaches that marriage is a lifelong covenant of one man and one woman, ordained by God and not to be broken lightly, and it also teaches that the Lord abhors oppression, falsehood and violence within that covenant. Sickness of mind, though it brings great trial and needs compassionate care and proper medical help, does not excuse sin, and sin such as you name, incest, lies, theft and abuse, calls for honest confession, repentance and, where needed, the protection of the innocent.
Do not bear this burden alone. Seek at once the help of godly and trusted pastors or elders in your own church, and let them know the whole truth as you have told it here. If you are in danger or have been harmed, seek safety and help from those who can protect you, and let your church shepherds walk with you in wisdom. Urge that your husband be called to account before the Lord and before those who have oversight, that he may seek both pardon and healing through Christ, for the Lord has begun to heal those He saves and that healing will work health and cure till we are without spot. Until there is true repentance and fruit worthy of it, you are right to require truth, safety and accountability, and not to be tricked again.
Healing must come before serving. When a person is lying sick of a fever, Christ first takes by the hand and lifts up, and then the healed one can minister. So come first to Christ for your own healing. Ask Him to pardon, to cleanse, and to heal your broken heart, and He will do a real saving work which no mere religious notion can counterfeit. He is able to heal, and He delights to show His healing power when His Word is taught and believed. Faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the Word of God, so keep yourself under faithful teaching and prayer, and let the healing virtue of His grace be infused into you day by day.
We will pray for you, that the Sun of Righteousness may rise upon you with healing in His wings, that you may have clear wisdom for each next step, protection from further harm, and strength to do what is right before God. We pray also for your husband, that God would bring him to see his sin, to seek forgiveness through Jesus Christ alone, to receive healing, and to walk in truth. May the Lord who alone can heal the nations heal you, keep you, and guide you by His Word and by wise counsel in the days to come.
There is abundance of healing power in Jesus Christ and His salvation. Not only is His fruit sweet and nourishing, but the very leaves of the Tree of Life are for the healing of the nations, and the least thing about Christ is healing. These healing leaves change the life blood and make the nature other than it was before. When the Lord comes and dwells with His people, healing and forgiveness are placed in happy conjunction and both are bestowed together. When Jesus healed the sick of the palsy He said, Son, be of good cheer, your sins are forgiven you, and pardon and healing were one.
You say you cannot love him any more and that you hear God telling you it is over. In such deep hurt the heart feels unable to love, and that feeling is to be brought honestly to Christ rather than acted upon in haste. Our feelings, even strong impressions that God has spoken, must be tried by the Word of God and by the counsel of faithful pastors and elders, for the heart when it is broken is not the best judge of its own case. The Scripture teaches that marriage is a lifelong covenant of one man and one woman, ordained by God and not to be broken lightly, and it also teaches that the Lord abhors oppression, falsehood and violence within that covenant. Sickness of mind, though it brings great trial and needs compassionate care and proper medical help, does not excuse sin, and sin such as you name, incest, lies, theft and abuse, calls for honest confession, repentance and, where needed, the protection of the innocent.
Do not bear this burden alone. Seek at once the help of godly and trusted pastors or elders in your own church, and let them know the whole truth as you have told it here. If you are in danger or have been harmed, seek safety and help from those who can protect you, and let your church shepherds walk with you in wisdom. Urge that your husband be called to account before the Lord and before those who have oversight, that he may seek both pardon and healing through Christ, for the Lord has begun to heal those He saves and that healing will work health and cure till we are without spot. Until there is true repentance and fruit worthy of it, you are right to require truth, safety and accountability, and not to be tricked again.
Healing must come before serving. When a person is lying sick of a fever, Christ first takes by the hand and lifts up, and then the healed one can minister. So come first to Christ for your own healing. Ask Him to pardon, to cleanse, and to heal your broken heart, and He will do a real saving work which no mere religious notion can counterfeit. He is able to heal, and He delights to show His healing power when His Word is taught and believed. Faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the Word of God, so keep yourself under faithful teaching and prayer, and let the healing virtue of His grace be infused into you day by day.
We will pray for you, that the Sun of Righteousness may rise upon you with healing in His wings, that you may have clear wisdom for each next step, protection from further harm, and strength to do what is right before God. We pray also for your husband, that God would bring him to see his sin, to seek forgiveness through Jesus Christ alone, to receive healing, and to walk in truth. May the Lord who alone can heal the nations heal you, keep you, and guide you by His Word and by wise counsel in the days to come.
Jonathan_M
Beloved of All
Praying for this request in Jesus Name.
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