We hear the anguish in your heart and we join with you in prayer before our Father in Jesus' name, for you are not forgotten and you are not forsaken even when it feels that way.
You have said you hate your sin and want to be free from the cycle of sin, and that godly sorrow is a gift from God. We praise God for that hatred of sin, because it shows His Spirit is working in you. The Word says If we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous to forgive us the sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness 1 John 1:9. And Sin will not have dominion over you, for you are not under law, but under grace Romans 6:14. We rebuke the hold of sin in your life and we encourage you to walk in repentance, to turn fully from that sin, to confess it specifically to God, and to walk in obedience by the power of the Holy Spirit. Freedom does not come by our own screaming or striving, but by submitting to God and resisting the enemy, as it is written Be subject therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you James 4:7.
You mention a demonic attack and wanting it out of your body. We take this seriously, for our struggle is not against flesh and blood but against spiritual forces Ephesians 6:12. Yet we want to gently correct that our deliverance is not by calling on angels, but by calling on the name of Jesus Christ. Angels are ministering spirits sent to serve those who will inherit salvation Hebrews 1:14 and He will give his angels charge over you Psalm 91:11, but we do not pray to angels, we pray to God the Father through Jesus, and He commands help on our behalf. There is power in the name of Jesus alone. It is only by the name of Jesus that we have access to God, for Jesus said I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me John 14:6 and There is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven that is given among men, by which we must be saved Acts 4:12. If you have not already, we urge you to place your full faith in Jesus Christ, believing that He died for your sins and rose again, confessing Him as Lord, for if you will confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved Romans 10:9. It is that relationship with Jesus that gives us authority to stand against every demonic oppression.
You feel so worthless and forsaken by God, and we want to speak truth over that lie. You are not worthless. You are fearfully and wonderfully made Psalm 139:14 and you are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works Ephesians 2:10. And God has promised I will never leave you, nor forsake you Hebrews 13:5 and Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid nor be dismayed, for Yahweh your God himself is he who goes with you. He will not fail you nor forsake you Deuteronomy 31:6. Your feelings of depression and being left behind are real, but they are not the truth of God's heart toward you. He sees your tears and hears your scream.
You shared your deep longing to be whole and to have children, and that this longing is bringing great sorrow. We understand that ache. Children are a heritage of Yahweh. The fruit of the womb is his reward Psalm 127:3. We pray for your healing and wholeness, for God says But I will restore health to you and I will heal you of your wounds, says Yahweh Jeremiah 30:17 and By his stripes we are healed Isaiah 53:5. We pray that God will make you whole in body and spirit according to His perfect will, and if it is His will for you, that He would bless you with children within the covenant of godly marriage between a man and a woman, for that is His design for family. If you are not yet married, we pray first for a godly spouse who is a believer in Christ, and that any desire for children would be fulfilled in the holy context of marriage. We encourage you to pursue purity and courtship that honors God as you wait.
You also carry the burden of bills and financial pressure. Our Father knows your needs. We pray He will provide for you as He has promised My God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus Philippians 4:19. Seek first God's Kingdom, and his righteousness; and all these things will be given to you as well Matthew 6:33.
We now pray together for you.
Father in heaven, we come before You in the mighty name of Jesus Christ, lifting up this precious soul who feels overwhelmed, worthless, oppressed and depressed. Lord, we confess sin on their behalf and ask for Your forgiveness and cleansing. Break the cycle of sin by the power of the cross. Set them free from every demonic influence and oppression, and let every spirit not of You flee at the name of Jesus. Fill this longing heart with Your Holy Spirit, with peace and assurance that they are loved, valued, and never forsaken. Heal their body and mind, make them whole as only You can. Provide for every financial need and open doors for provision. Comfort their deep desire for children, and fulfill it according to Your perfect timing and will, in a way that honors You. Put Your armor upon them, that they may stand strong, and let them know Your presence is near. We ask all this in the name of Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior, amen.
We encourage you to stay in the Word daily, to pray continually in Jesus' name, to put on the whole armor of God Ephesians 6:11, to fellowship with Bible believing Christians, and to seek help from a trusted pastor or counselor if the oppression and depression remain heavy. Keep crying out to Jesus, for He is near to the brokenhearted Psalm 34:18 and He will not turn you away.