Silas
Beloved of All
Your pain is real and God sees the hurt in your heart and hears your cry. It is good that you have brought this to Him honestly and that you are willing to forgive, because a heart that wants to forgive is already moving in the direction of His grace.
I want to gently encourage you to look first to what matters most, which is your own relationship with God. Our lives turn on that vertical axis. When our relationship with Him is out of balance, every other relationship becomes out of balance as well. When that central relationship is made right, the others begin to find their proper place. It is easy to spend all of our energy trying to fix one human relationship while everything else grows more strained, but Scripture shows that if we come back to the Lord and get that vertical relationship right, He brings order and wisdom to the horizontal ones.
God does not want a distant or merely formal relationship with you. He wants a close, loving relationship as a Father with His child. Jesus taught us to pray, Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, and that speaks of intimacy and trust. Through Jesus Christ alone we are brought into that relationship. Our sins had separated us from God, but through the blood of Jesus atonement is made and forgiveness is offered. He not only forgives sin, He removes it from us, so that we stand before Him justified, as though we had never sinned. If you have not yet rested fully in that personal relationship with Jesus, that is the first place to come and to remain, living in His love and knowing how deeply you are loved by Him.
Out of that relationship, He can then shape every other relationship in your life for good. A right relationship with the Lord will affect how you relate to others, how you use what He has entrusted to you, and how you stand against the enemy. The Bible never leaves these truths as abstract ideas, it shows how they work out practically, and nowhere is this more important than in the relationship between a man and a woman. God's design for romantic love is that it belongs within the lifelong covenant of marriage between one man and one woman, and that living together and sexual intimacy belong only within that covenant. Any relationship outside of that design cannot be blessed by God as it is, even when feelings are sincere.
So as you pray about communication being restored and about the hurt, anger and distance being removed, place the whole matter in His hands and ask above all for His will to be done and for both of you to be guided toward what is right and holy in His eyes. It is right to ask for a softened heart, for honesty, patience and peace, and for the strength to let go of hurt. Scripture calls us to forgive as God has forgiven us, not holding onto offenses and bringing them up again, but releasing them fully as He has released us. That kind of forgiveness brings freedom whether or not the other person responds, and it keeps your own heart tender before the Lord.
Ask Him to heal what is broken in you first, to deepen your fellowship with Him, and to give you wisdom for whatever next step honors Him. If reconciliation is part of His will for you, pray that it would be on a path that honors Him, with truth, purity and a commitment that reflects His covenant love. If His will is otherwise, pray that He would give you peace and completeness in Him and lead you forward in a way that is upright.
You have done the right thing to say, if it is Your will. Keep praying that way. Trust your Father to do what is best, to teach you to love as He loves, to forgive as He has forgiven you, and to let every other relationship be shaped and strengthened by your walk with Him.
I want to gently encourage you to look first to what matters most, which is your own relationship with God. Our lives turn on that vertical axis. When our relationship with Him is out of balance, every other relationship becomes out of balance as well. When that central relationship is made right, the others begin to find their proper place. It is easy to spend all of our energy trying to fix one human relationship while everything else grows more strained, but Scripture shows that if we come back to the Lord and get that vertical relationship right, He brings order and wisdom to the horizontal ones.
God does not want a distant or merely formal relationship with you. He wants a close, loving relationship as a Father with His child. Jesus taught us to pray, Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, and that speaks of intimacy and trust. Through Jesus Christ alone we are brought into that relationship. Our sins had separated us from God, but through the blood of Jesus atonement is made and forgiveness is offered. He not only forgives sin, He removes it from us, so that we stand before Him justified, as though we had never sinned. If you have not yet rested fully in that personal relationship with Jesus, that is the first place to come and to remain, living in His love and knowing how deeply you are loved by Him.
Out of that relationship, He can then shape every other relationship in your life for good. A right relationship with the Lord will affect how you relate to others, how you use what He has entrusted to you, and how you stand against the enemy. The Bible never leaves these truths as abstract ideas, it shows how they work out practically, and nowhere is this more important than in the relationship between a man and a woman. God's design for romantic love is that it belongs within the lifelong covenant of marriage between one man and one woman, and that living together and sexual intimacy belong only within that covenant. Any relationship outside of that design cannot be blessed by God as it is, even when feelings are sincere.
So as you pray about communication being restored and about the hurt, anger and distance being removed, place the whole matter in His hands and ask above all for His will to be done and for both of you to be guided toward what is right and holy in His eyes. It is right to ask for a softened heart, for honesty, patience and peace, and for the strength to let go of hurt. Scripture calls us to forgive as God has forgiven us, not holding onto offenses and bringing them up again, but releasing them fully as He has released us. That kind of forgiveness brings freedom whether or not the other person responds, and it keeps your own heart tender before the Lord.
Ask Him to heal what is broken in you first, to deepen your fellowship with Him, and to give you wisdom for whatever next step honors Him. If reconciliation is part of His will for you, pray that it would be on a path that honors Him, with truth, purity and a commitment that reflects His covenant love. If His will is otherwise, pray that He would give you peace and completeness in Him and lead you forward in a way that is upright.
You have done the right thing to say, if it is Your will. Keep praying that way. Trust your Father to do what is best, to teach you to love as He loves, to forgive as He has forgiven you, and to let every other relationship be shaped and strengthened by your walk with Him.
