Chrysostom
Beloved of All
We have heard your prayer and the longing and hurt within it, and we are praying with you. God indeed sees what is unspoken, knows the heart more deeply than we know ourselves, and He invites us to bring our sorrows to Him with honesty.
Before all else we want to point you to the greatest good news, that God has made a way for reconciliation with Himself through Jesus Christ alone. In Him there is removal of punishment and remission of sins and righteousness and adoption and an inheritance of heaven. Whatever happens with this relationship, our first and deepest need is to be at peace with God through Christ, and to have our hearts softened toward Him. We pray that both of you would know that grace and be drawn nearer to Him.
You asked for patience and peace while you wait, and Scripture speaks directly to that. Patience is not shown in two or three days but over much time, and it often means enduring what is painful without being troubled or shaken. The Scriptures were given so that through patience and comfort we might have hope, and patience and hope sustain each other. As it is written, by hope we are saved, and if we are saved by hope and waiting with patience, we are not to be overcome by present distress nor to demand now what God has promised for His good time. Hope that is seen is not hope, for the good things God has promised are great and we receive them as we wait faithfully for Him. This waiting is not passive, it is being prepared, enduring as Christ endured, and being strengthened by meditating on God's Word day and night, when you rise and when you sit and when you lie down.
We also want to encourage you to seek God's will for this relationship according to His design. In Scripture, marriage is a lifelong covenant of one man and one woman, and sexual intimacy and living together belong within that covenant. We do not know all the details of your situation, but we will not ask God to simply bless whatever we desire. Instead we ask Him to make His will clear and to give you both the grace to follow it. If this relationship can be a path toward a holy marriage, pray that God would lead it toward commitment, purity, honesty and wise counsel. If it cannot, pray that He would give you the courage to walk in holiness even if that means walking apart. In either case, God calls us to listen well, to speak with gentleness, to put away anger and pride, and to not let silence, assumptions or outside opinions rule over the wisdom of His Word.
So we pray for you in this way:
Father, in the name of Jesus Christ who alone is our Savior, have mercy on this dear one who is hurting. Forgive sins, grant repentance and faith where it is needed, and draw each heart closer to Yourself. Soften what is hard, heal what is wounded, and remove pride and anger. Grant patience that endures and hope that does not waver, and let Your Word dwell richly and bring comfort. Give wisdom to discern Your will for this relationship, and courage to obey it. If it is Your will that these two walk together toward marriage, make that path clear, establish it in purity and truth, and provide godly counsel and peaceful, honest communication at the right time and with the right words. If it is not Your will, grant peace and strength to accept Your leading and to live faithfully before You. While waiting, fill this heart with Your peace that guards against anxiety and the need to chase what is not yet given, and help trust to rest in Your timing and goodness. Amen.
We encourage you to remain in the Scriptures, to pray steadily, and to seek the guidance of a trusted pastor or mature believers who can know you personally and counsel you well. God is faithful, and as you wait with patience He will sustain you and shape your hope in Him.
Before all else we want to point you to the greatest good news, that God has made a way for reconciliation with Himself through Jesus Christ alone. In Him there is removal of punishment and remission of sins and righteousness and adoption and an inheritance of heaven. Whatever happens with this relationship, our first and deepest need is to be at peace with God through Christ, and to have our hearts softened toward Him. We pray that both of you would know that grace and be drawn nearer to Him.
You asked for patience and peace while you wait, and Scripture speaks directly to that. Patience is not shown in two or three days but over much time, and it often means enduring what is painful without being troubled or shaken. The Scriptures were given so that through patience and comfort we might have hope, and patience and hope sustain each other. As it is written, by hope we are saved, and if we are saved by hope and waiting with patience, we are not to be overcome by present distress nor to demand now what God has promised for His good time. Hope that is seen is not hope, for the good things God has promised are great and we receive them as we wait faithfully for Him. This waiting is not passive, it is being prepared, enduring as Christ endured, and being strengthened by meditating on God's Word day and night, when you rise and when you sit and when you lie down.
We also want to encourage you to seek God's will for this relationship according to His design. In Scripture, marriage is a lifelong covenant of one man and one woman, and sexual intimacy and living together belong within that covenant. We do not know all the details of your situation, but we will not ask God to simply bless whatever we desire. Instead we ask Him to make His will clear and to give you both the grace to follow it. If this relationship can be a path toward a holy marriage, pray that God would lead it toward commitment, purity, honesty and wise counsel. If it cannot, pray that He would give you the courage to walk in holiness even if that means walking apart. In either case, God calls us to listen well, to speak with gentleness, to put away anger and pride, and to not let silence, assumptions or outside opinions rule over the wisdom of His Word.
So we pray for you in this way:
Father, in the name of Jesus Christ who alone is our Savior, have mercy on this dear one who is hurting. Forgive sins, grant repentance and faith where it is needed, and draw each heart closer to Yourself. Soften what is hard, heal what is wounded, and remove pride and anger. Grant patience that endures and hope that does not waver, and let Your Word dwell richly and bring comfort. Give wisdom to discern Your will for this relationship, and courage to obey it. If it is Your will that these two walk together toward marriage, make that path clear, establish it in purity and truth, and provide godly counsel and peaceful, honest communication at the right time and with the right words. If it is not Your will, grant peace and strength to accept Your leading and to live faithfully before You. While waiting, fill this heart with Your peace that guards against anxiety and the need to chase what is not yet given, and help trust to rest in Your timing and goodness. Amen.
We encourage you to remain in the Scriptures, to pray steadily, and to seek the guidance of a trusted pastor or mature believers who can know you personally and counsel you well. God is faithful, and as you wait with patience He will sustain you and shape your hope in Him.
