Silas
Beloved of All
Your honesty in naming that this trauma came from your own irrational and reckless decisions is important before God, and it is the place where healing can begin.
Guilt is not something you can hide from or outrun. When it is covered or excused or justified, it stays and weighs on the whole person. David described it as a heaviness that dried up his strength and made his whole being ache, and that his sin was ever before him. Forgiveness does not come through justifying what was done. It comes when it is openly acknowledged and confessed to God. Then God can deal with it.
Many people try to heal themselves with another formula for self improvement, another way to be a better person. Romans chapter 7 shows a different cry. After all self help has failed, the cry becomes, Who will deliver me. That is coming to the end of yourself, to the end of the self governed life. The answer is outside of you. It is Jesus Christ. The path of following Him is the path of the cross, where the old self is reckoned as crucified with Christ so that sin no longer rules, and the new life is ruled by the Spirit of God. You do not have to keep trying to fix the old nature. You bring it to the cross and then follow Him.
You may feel a deep desire to punish yourself, as if you must pay for what you have done before you can be free. Guilt often creates that feeling. But when God forgives, His forgiveness is total and complete. The Scripture says though your sins are as scarlet they shall be as white as snow, and where sin abounded grace abounded much more. That does not mean we continue in sin so grace may abound. God forbid. It means we who have died to sin through Christ do not live in it any longer, because the price has already been paid. Jesus bore the punishment so you do not have to carry the endless punishment of guilt. There is nothing that removes the weight of guilt like confessing to God and receiving His cleansing.
Healing from the wounds that remain is often a process. The Bible shows that Jesus sometimes healed instantly and sometimes gradually, and all true healing is from God, whether it comes in a moment or through the natural processes He created in body and mind. He heals scars in the emotions and the mind as well as the body. Some consequences of past choices may still need to be walked through, as David found even after he was forgiven, but the heavy hand of guilt can be lifted and fellowship with God restored. From that place God says He will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go and guide you with His eye. He has given you the gift of choice, and you can determine your future by choosing now to walk with Him in obedience.
The greatest miracle is not only the relief of pain but the forgiveness of sins and new life in Christ. That is the foundation for all other healing.
I pray for you now that you will confess fully to the Lord what you have done without excuse, receive His complete forgiveness through Jesus, reckon your old self as crucified with Him, and walk in the new life of the Spirit. I pray that God will wash away the guilt that has plagued you, bring healing to the trauma in your mind and heart whether quickly or gradually as He wills, and give you joy and gladness again. May He guide your steps forward and establish you in His peace.
Guilt is not something you can hide from or outrun. When it is covered or excused or justified, it stays and weighs on the whole person. David described it as a heaviness that dried up his strength and made his whole being ache, and that his sin was ever before him. Forgiveness does not come through justifying what was done. It comes when it is openly acknowledged and confessed to God. Then God can deal with it.
Many people try to heal themselves with another formula for self improvement, another way to be a better person. Romans chapter 7 shows a different cry. After all self help has failed, the cry becomes, Who will deliver me. That is coming to the end of yourself, to the end of the self governed life. The answer is outside of you. It is Jesus Christ. The path of following Him is the path of the cross, where the old self is reckoned as crucified with Christ so that sin no longer rules, and the new life is ruled by the Spirit of God. You do not have to keep trying to fix the old nature. You bring it to the cross and then follow Him.
You may feel a deep desire to punish yourself, as if you must pay for what you have done before you can be free. Guilt often creates that feeling. But when God forgives, His forgiveness is total and complete. The Scripture says though your sins are as scarlet they shall be as white as snow, and where sin abounded grace abounded much more. That does not mean we continue in sin so grace may abound. God forbid. It means we who have died to sin through Christ do not live in it any longer, because the price has already been paid. Jesus bore the punishment so you do not have to carry the endless punishment of guilt. There is nothing that removes the weight of guilt like confessing to God and receiving His cleansing.
Healing from the wounds that remain is often a process. The Bible shows that Jesus sometimes healed instantly and sometimes gradually, and all true healing is from God, whether it comes in a moment or through the natural processes He created in body and mind. He heals scars in the emotions and the mind as well as the body. Some consequences of past choices may still need to be walked through, as David found even after he was forgiven, but the heavy hand of guilt can be lifted and fellowship with God restored. From that place God says He will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go and guide you with His eye. He has given you the gift of choice, and you can determine your future by choosing now to walk with Him in obedience.
The greatest miracle is not only the relief of pain but the forgiveness of sins and new life in Christ. That is the foundation for all other healing.
I pray for you now that you will confess fully to the Lord what you have done without excuse, receive His complete forgiveness through Jesus, reckon your old self as crucified with Him, and walk in the new life of the Spirit. I pray that God will wash away the guilt that has plagued you, bring healing to the trauma in your mind and heart whether quickly or gradually as He wills, and give you joy and gladness again. May He guide your steps forward and establish you in His peace.
