We hear your heart in this and we thank you for humbling yourself to mention the name of Jesus, for it is only through Him that we have access to the Father and it is only by His name that we are saved. As it is written, Jesus said to him, I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me. John 14:6 and There is salvation in none other, for neither is there any other name under heaven, that is given among men, by which we must be saved. Acts 4:12. We rejoice that you have called upon Him now and we come alongside you in His name.
We understand that feeling of ash in your mouth, where nothing brings joy anymore. The psalmist and prophets knew that heaviness too, and God does not turn away from a broken and honest heart. Yahweh is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit. Psalm 34:18. We want you to know that God is not cruel and He does not delight in your suffering, but He does love you enough to use even painful seasons to draw you closer to Himself. For whom the Lord loves, he disciplines, and chastises every son whom he receives. Hebrews 12:6. Sometimes anxiety, depression and guilt can be the Spirit convicting us of sin that needs to be confessed, and sometimes it is the weight of living in a fallen world, or the enemy's condemnation trying to crush you. There is a difference between godly conviction which leads to repentance and life, and condemnation which leaves you in despair. There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus. Romans 8:1. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous to forgive us the sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. 1 John 1:9. If there is specific sin weighing on you, bring it into the light with Jesus and He will forgive and cleanse you completely. If the guilt lingers after confession, that is not from God, for God restores joy.
We also hear your tiredness of being alone and we do not take that lightly. God Himself said, It is not good that the man should be alone. Genesis 2:18 and God sets the lonely in families. Psalm 68:6. Your desire for companionship is not wrong, it is God given. We believe that desire is meant to be fulfilled in godly marriage as a lifelong commitment between a man and a woman, and we pray that if it is His will He will lead you to a godly spouse in His timing. Whoever finds a wife finds a good thing, and obtains favor of Yahweh. Proverbs 18:22. We encourage you while you wait to pursue courtship that honors God, with the goal of marriage to another Christian believer, fleeing from fornication and keeping yourself pure before Him, and to seek fellowship in the body of Christ so you are not isolated. Loneliness grows in isolation, but God often eases it through His people.
For the heaviness and lack of joy, we want to remind you where true joy is found. You will show me the path of life. In your presence is fullness of joy. In your right hand there are pleasures forever more. Psalm 16:11 and the joy of Yahweh is your strength. Nehemiah 8:10. Joy is not found in circumstances but in His presence. For anxiety and depression, the Lord invites you to cast your cares on Him. In nothing be anxious, but in everything, by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your thoughts in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7 and Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time, casting all your worries on him, because he cares for you. 1 Peter 5:6-7. Jesus Himself says, Come to me, all you who labor and are heavily burdened, and I will give you rest. Matthew 11:28.
We pray together for you now.
Father in heaven, we lift up this dear one to You in the name of Jesus Christ. You see the heaviness, the anxiety, the depression, the guilt that feels like ash, and the deep loneliness. Lord we ask You to reveal Yourself as near, as comforter and as Savior. If there is any sin that needs confession, bring it to light and grant repentance, and let them know the full forgiveness and cleansing that is in the blood of Jesus. Break the power of condemnation and replace it with Your peace that surpasses all understanding. Restore joy in Your presence, lift this burden, and give rest to this weary soul. Renew their mind with Your Word and guard their heart and thoughts in Christ Jesus. Father, You know the ache of being alone, and we ask that You surround them with godly fellowship and community, and in Your perfect timing, if it is Your will, provide a godly spouse for marriage that will honor You, a relationship built on purity and faith. Until then, help them to walk closely with You and to find their wholeness in You first. Keep them, hold them, and let them feel Your love in a fresh way today. We ask all this in the mighty and saving name of Jesus Christ, amen.
We encourage you to stay in the Word daily, to pour out your heart honestly to the Lord in prayer, and to share this burden with a trusted pastor or mature Christian believer who can walk with you and pray with you regularly. If the depression feels heavy and ongoing, please also seek help from a pastor or biblical counselor and do not walk through this alone. Keep calling upon Jesus, He is listening and He cares deeply for you.