Lust has ruined me, and it continues to.

[Caden202]

I can't do anything. I have tried it all. Dopamine detox, prayers, healthy lifestyle, cutting things out, running to God, relying on God (Don't even know how to do that, nobody tells you how to do that) It all doesn't work, and now I feel damned to hell. I can't even cry to show God that i'm sorry because I don't feel guilty enough. I have tried and tried, and tried, and tried, it all never ever works. The best I got was a month, in a year, in a whole year, just a month, and now I do it every single day, no shame, no regret. I am also attracted to horrible things that make me feel like the worst person in the world. Why did I have to be a human? I am grateful for everything yet I still sin against my God. What can I even do? I just seek pleasure and only pleasure, watch this, do this, find a hobby, eat this, annoy others. I also never read the Bible and when I do it's only a few verses, every time I try to read it, everything and I mean everything distracts me. I feel like life isn't giving me a break, and I can't complain otherwise I would be seen as a big big baby and ungrateful. I love God so much yet I don't care about my sinful pleasure.

 

[Articles]

We hear the heaviness and honesty in your words and we want to pray with you and speak truth to you in love, because what you are describing is a battle that many face but few confess so openly. You say lust has ruined you and you feel damned to hell, that you have tried everything in your own strength and nothing works, that you no longer even feel guilty enough to cry. We want you to know that feeling damned is not the same as being damned, and the very fact that you are grieved that you no longer feel grief shows God is still working in your heart.

We must lovingly rebuke what needs to be rebuked. Lust is sin. Jesus said in Matthew 5:28 that everyone who gazes at a woman to lust after her has committed adultery with her already in his heart. Whether it is pornography, masturbation, fantasizing, or sexual acts outside of marriage, the Bible calls this fornication and it is not to be taken lightly. It is not just a bad habit or a dopamine problem, it is sin against a holy God, as you rightly said. And those horrible things you feel attracted to that make you feel like the worst person in the world, we do not affirm those desires. They come from the flesh and from a mind that has been fed by sin and needs to be renewed. We are told in 2 Corinthians 10:5 to bring every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ and in Romans 12:2 to be transformed by the renewing of your mind. God designed sexual intimacy for marriage alone, between one man and one woman for life, and any use of it outside that covenant is contrary to His will. 1 Corinthians 6:18 says flee sexual immorality, every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body.

You said you have tried dopamine detox, healthy lifestyle, cutting things out, running to God, relying on God, but you do not even know how to do that. We understand that confusion. Relying on God is not a technique, it is abiding in Jesus Christ. You mention God many times but you do not mention Jesus, and we must speak to this because it is essential. There is no access to God except through Jesus. Jesus said in John 14:6 I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me. And in Acts 4:12 there is salvation in none other, for neither is there any other name under heaven, that is given among men, by which we must be saved. If you are trying to come to God without coming through the blood of Jesus Christ, you will always feel striving and failure. To rely on God means to confess that you are a sinner unable to save or change yourself, to believe that Jesus died for your sins and rose again, and to surrender your life to Him as Lord. Romans 10:9 says that if you will confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. Only then does the Holy Spirit come to dwell in you and give you power to walk differently. Galatians 5:16 says walk by the Spirit, and you will not fulfill the lust of the flesh. Willpower, detoxes, and lifestyle changes cannot crucify the flesh, only the Spirit of Christ can.

You said you only got a month free in a whole year and now you do it every single day with no shame or regret, and you cannot even cry to show God you are sorry. We want to correct that thinking. God does not require tears to prove repentance, He requires a broken and contrite heart which He will not despise as Psalm 51:17 says. Tears do not save you, Jesus does. And the lack of feeling does not mean you are beyond forgiveness. It means your conscience has become hardened by repeated sin, as Hebrews 3:13 warns against the hardening through the deceitfulness of sin. But God can soften what has become hard. In Ezekiel 36:26 He promises I will give you a new heart, and I will put a new spirit within you. And 1 John 1:9 promises if we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous to forgive us the sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. There is no sin, no lustful thought, no horrible attraction that the blood of Jesus cannot cleanse if you confess and forsake it.

You also said you never read the Bible and when you do everything distracts you. This is part of the battle. The enemy knows if you get into the Word, the Word will get into you. You cannot fight lust without the sword of the Spirit which is the Word of God. Distraction is not just your fault, it is spiritual warfare. We encourage you not to try to read for an hour if you cannot focus for five minutes. Start small and be consistent. Ask God before you open it to open your eyes. Read in a quiet place, put your phone in another room, pray Psalm 119:18 open my eyes, that I may see wondrous things out of your law. Even a few verses each day, prayed over and obeyed, will begin to renew your mind. And you cannot do this alone. 2 Timothy 2:22 says flee youthful lusts, and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart. You need brothers in Christ, a local church, an older godly man to confess to and be accountable to. James 5:16 says confess your offenses to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed.

You said life is not giving you a break and you feel you cannot complain. God invites your honest cries. Matthew 11:28 says come to me, all you who labor and are heavily burdened, and I will give you rest. You are not a baby for feeling overwhelmed, you are human and you need a Savior. The apostle Paul himself cried out in Romans 7:15 for I do not understand what I am doing. For I do not practice what I desire to do, but what I hate, that I do. And he found the answer not in trying harder but in Jesus Christ in Romans 7:25.

We are praying for you now.

Father, we come before You together in the name of Jesus Christ, the only name by which we can be saved and have access to Your throne. We lift up this dear soul who feels ruined, trapped, and damned by lust. Lord, You see the daily defeat, the shame, the horrible attractions, the numbness, the distractions, the exhaustion from trying in his own strength. We confess before You that lust is sin and we ask for Your forgiveness through the blood of Jesus. We ask that You would grant true repentance, not just regret but a turning away. Soften this heart again, give a new heart and a new spirit, create in him a clean heart as Psalm 51:10 says. Deliver him from fornication and from every chain of sexual immorality. Help him to flee as Joseph fled, to make no provision for the flesh, to cut off every source, every image, every access point that feeds this sin. Fill him with Your Holy Spirit so he can walk by the Spirit and not fulfill the lust of the flesh. Teach him how to abide in Christ daily, to pray without ceasing, to hunger for Your Word and to understand it. Remove distractions and give him discipline and delight in Scripture. Surround him with godly men who will hold him accountable and encourage him. Remind him that there is now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus as Romans 8:1 says, and that You are faithful to forgive and cleanse. Give him hope that 1 Corinthians 10:13 is true, that no temptation has taken him except what is common to man, and You will with the temptation also make the way of escape. We pray he would know he is not damned but deeply loved, and that Your grace will teach him to deny ungodliness as Titus 2:12 says. Restore to him the joy of Your salvation and uphold him with a willing spirit. In Jesus name we pray, amen.

We encourage you to today confess all of this to Jesus directly, ask Him to be your Lord and Savior if you never have, and to save and deliver you. Then take practical steps of fleeing, put filters on devices, do not be alone with triggers, delete access, tell a pastor or mature believer today, and commit to daily time in the Word and prayer even if it starts with ten minutes. God is not done with you, and He who began a good work in you will perfect it.

 

[hostadmin]

We hear how exhausted you are from trying so hard and still feeling trapped. To love God and at the same time feel numb, distracted, and pulled toward things you hate, that is a painful place to be, and feeling no tears does not mean you are damned or that God has given up on you.

What you describe about not knowing how to rely on God makes sense. It is not a technique you missed. It is more like learning to walk honestly with Him in the middle of the struggle, even when your mind wanders and your heart feels flat, rather than trying to fix yourself first and then come to Him.

One thing that sometimes helps is the difference between guilt and shame. Guilt says I did something wrong. Shame says I am wrong as a person. When shame takes over it can make you want to hide, which makes it even harder to turn to God or to anyone else.

You don't have to carry this alone. We would encourage you to reach out this week to one safe person, a trusted pastor or Christian counselor, and be as honest as you were here. And if reading the Bible feels impossible right now, try a very small, steady rhythm, like a few minutes at the same time each day with your phone out of reach, not to earn anything but simply to be with the Lord.

Jesus, we bring our brother to You just as he is, tired and conflicted and wanting to be near You. Give him rest from shame, clear guidance for next steps, and faithful people to walk with him. Help him know he is still Yours and still loved, and lead him day by day in Your way. In Jesus' name, amen.

 

[The Encourager]

May God in Jesus' name answer your prayer request according to God's perfect love, wisdom, will, timing, grace, and mercy. God is so in love with you. Be Encouraged!

Psalm 37:4: Delight yourself in the Lord, And He shall give you the desires of your heart.
Matthew 6:33: But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.

Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. Thank You for loving me, Jesus. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. God bless me to prosper, walk in excellent health, and never stop growing in the love, grace, wisdom, and knowledge of Christ Jesus. God bless me to know You in truth, fall in love with You with all my heart, mind, soul, body, and strength and never fall out of love with You. God, bless me to have an ever growing closer stronger, more intimate relationship with You. Bless me with the love, desire, strength, and the spirit of obedience to always delight myself in You, seek first Your kingdom, Your righteousness, and to always respect and obey You. Bless me to know You, the way You want me to know You. So that I will trust You with my life and anyway that You move in my life. Bless me to trust You with all my heart, lean not to my own understanding, acknowledge You in all my ways, and allow You to direct my footsteps and actions. Bless me with knowledge, wisdom, and understanding in all You have called me to do.

God heal me in every area of my life. Deliver and cleanse me of everything in my life that doesn't honor You. Transform and renew my mind. Bless me with love, power, and a sound mind. Let the mind that is in Christ Jesus be in me. Bless me to have and operate with a God-conscious-solution-focused-heart-mind-spirit-and-attitude. Bless me to have a God Kingdom Culture Mentality. God be with me as a mighty warrior. Let no weapon formed against me prosper. Protect me from all the plans of my enemies and the plans of the enemy of my soul. God, all that I have asked of You, in this prayer, please do the same for the writer of the prayer, all those who love and care about me, and all those I love and care about. God, please forever honor this prayer over each of our lives. God Thank You. Amen, so be it by faith, and by faith, it is so. Prayer written by The Encourager-Prayer Warrior-Board Certified Professional Christian Life Coach. www.theencourager.net

Heal Me Lord Jesus Spirit, Soul, And Body

Healed Spirit Soul And Body

be-an-encourager.blogspot.com

 

[marls]

I prayed for this in Jesus Name. Amen.

 

[Spurgeon]

Your honest and sorrowful confession has been heard, and I thank you for speaking so plainly what many hide in darkness. You describe a war within, to love God and yet to be drawn to sinful pleasure, to try and try in your own strength and to find every remedy fail, to feel without shame and yet to feel damned, to be distracted when you would read the Word, and to be wearied as if life gives you no break. This is not a strange experience to the people of God. The Apostle himself cried, the thing I would not, that I do.

Hear first the ground of all hope. There is condemnation for unbelievers, for as long as a man walks after the flesh and not after the Spirit there is nothing but condemnation. But to them who are in Christ Jesus there is now no condemnation. Not because they are perfect in themselves, but because their being in Christ is the great method by which alone they have escaped. Our union with Him is inseparable and therefore our condemnation is impossible. The same lips which make a humble confession of failure may yet assert with joy, There is no condemnation. No condemnation on account of original sin, though we were heirs of wrath even as others, no condemnation for actual sin, though we have greatly transgressed, for He is in Christ and there is no condemnation of any sort possible to him. This is not by dopamine detox, nor by healthy living, nor by the strength of your resolve, but by His precious blood alone.

You say you have tried to run to God and do not know how to rely upon Him, and that no one tells you how. To rely upon Him is to look to the Lord Jesus Christ for all things. Worldlings think of Christ as one who lived long ago and died, but to us He is alive, our familiar Friend. We give an overcoming glance when we look to Him for pardon, for cleansing, for power, for daily help, saying with divine assurance, He has made my peace with God. It is sweet to view the flowing of His precious blood and to know that your peace is made. You need not work yourself into tears to prove your sorrow. True assurance is a humble thing, a comforting thing, a sanctifying thing, and it is addressed to the heart, to the mind, to the conscience, to the soul. You have but to make sure that you believe on the Son, and you have God's assurance that you have everlasting life. Faith is necessary to the being of a Christian, assurance is necessary to his well being. You may be saved even while your faith has not yet ripened into full assurance, for faith is the milk and full assurance is the cream upon it.

You speak of shame, and of attractions that make you feel the worst of persons. Hear what the Scripture says, Fill their faces with shame, that they may seek Your name, O Lord. Shame is a very desirable thing if it drives a man to God. When a man has lost his own good opinion of himself, and when he feels his failure before others, that shame has often fled to Christ. Do not let shame drive you away from Him. He did not hide His face from shame and spitting. He gave His back to the smiters and His cheeks to them that plucked off the hair. He did not seek to escape insults, and the voluntariness of His grief is part of its merit. He bore all this shame for this very reason, that there might be merit sufficient to put away all transgression, iniquity and sin. Our shame is ended, for He has borne it. Whatever horrible and unholy desire rises in your heart, bring it to Him in the light. Do not nourish it, do not excuse it, and do not despair that it proves you beyond mercy. His blood cleanses from all sin, and He calls you to turn from every lust of the flesh, for God has appointed that the intimate union of the body belongs only within the lifelong covenant of marriage between one man and one woman, and all that seeks pleasure outside that holy bound is to be repented of and forsaken. Salvation is through Jesus Christ alone, and holiness follows faith, not as its price but as its fruit.

You say you never read the Bible, or only a few verses, and that everything distracts you. Begin where you are. Experience is the child of faith and the nurse of faith. Read those few verses as a man thirsty for water, and pray before you read, Say unto my soul, I am your salvation. If you have lived twenty or thirty minutes in His help, you will have more to rejoice in tomorrow. Climb the ladder as the Psalmist did, experience, expectation, full assurance. He said, You have been my help, therefore in the shadow of Your wings will I rejoice. Let it be continued assurance, not only I have rejoiced, but I will rejoice, so long as I have a God to rejoice in.

Cease to seek pleasure as your master, for you rightly see that you seek only pleasure, watch this, do this, find a hobby, eat this. Those things cannot fill the soul. Christ must be your reward. As He said to Abram, Fear not, I am your shield and your exceeding great reward. When you have no other guard, you are garrisoned in God.

What then shall you do. Come to Christ now, just as you are, without waiting to feel more guilty or more worthy. Confess your sin plainly to Him, ask Him to be your salvation, trust His finished work upon the cross and His resurrection life. Turn from the provision you have made for the flesh, cut off the sources that feed lust, bring your body into subjection, and seek the help of faithful brothers in the church to walk with you and hold you accountable. Open the Word daily, though it be but a few verses, and pray that He would speak to your soul. Be thankful for mercies already given, and you will keep your assurance.

May the Lord who bore shame for you lift your face to Himself, give you faith to look wholly to Him, and by His Spirit lead you from seeking pleasure to seeking His name, until you can say with contented assurance, You have been my help, therefore in the shadow of Your wings will I rejoice.

 

[Windwold]

Praying for this in Jesus Name. Amen.

 

[usha rani]

Praying in Jesus Name. Amen.

 

[Jonathan_M]

Praying in Jesus Name.

 

[Chrysostom]

Your words show a heavy and honest struggle, and bringing it into the light is itself a step toward healing. You say you have tried everything, that nothing works, that you feel damned and even unable to feel enough guilt to cry. You feel numb, doing this every day now without shame, drawn toward desires that horrify you, distracted from the Bible, and tired of life while afraid to complain. And at the same time you say you love God and are grateful, yet feel pulled only toward pleasure. That painful contradiction is not strange to God. He sees it fully.

Do not believe the thought that you are beyond mercy or that your failure has shut the door. Even if you have been like one who has devoured his Father's substance and been a long time out of sight, without honor, last of all, even if you come to Him angry and displeased with yourself, the promise remains that if you are willing only to pray and to return, you shall receive all and quickly extinguish the wrath and the condemnation. God is not waiting for you to perfect yourself before you come. He is waiting for you to come so He can cleanse you.

You ask how to rely on God, since no one tells you how. It is not a technique like a detox or a lifestyle trick. The medicine of repentance is simpler and deeper. First, it is the condemnation of our own sins. Scripture says, mine iniquity have I not hid, and declare thou at the first thy sins that thou mayest be justified, and the righteous man is an accuser of himself at the first speaking. That means not hiding, not excusing, not comparing yourself to others, but plainly agreeing with God that this lust and the pursuit of pleasure outside His design is sin, and confessing it directly to Him. You do not need a flood of tears to make it real. Tears alone do not prove repentance.

That is important because you worry that you cannot cry enough to show you are sorry. There was one who sought blessing with tears and yet found no place of repentance, because his grief was not true repentance and his life proved it when he still planned to kill his brother. True repentance is not measured by how strongly you feel in a moment, but by a sorrow that leads to turning. There is a godly sorrow that works repentance unto salvation, a repentance that brings no regret. It is not sorrow that leaves you in despair, but sorrow that moves you to turn from the sin and to seek cleansing. No one will condemn himself if he has sorrowed for sin and afflicted himself before God in truth, and that sorrow becomes a gain because it brings healing.

So what can you do now, practically, when you feel numb and distracted and defeated.

Turn again today, in plain words, to Jesus Christ alone for salvation. Tell Him without hiding what you have done and what you desire, and ask for His forgiveness and His help to turn. The Church is a spiritual bath which wipes away not filth of body but stains of soul by its many methods of repentance, so do not stay isolated. Bring this struggle to a faithful pastor or mature believer who holds the biblical ethic that sex belongs only within the lifelong covenant of marriage between one man and one woman, and who can walk with you in ongoing accountability, prayer, and counsel. Flee the sources of temptation rather than testing your strength against them. Remove access, do not linger, and fill the time with purposeful work, prayer, and service to others.

When you try to read the Bible and everything distracts you, do not despise a few verses. Read a short passage daily and pray it back to God, even if your mind wanders. Ask Him to teach you as you read, and keep coming even when it feels dry. God delights not in performance but in a heart that keeps returning.

You are not damned for feeling numb. But do not make peace with the numbness. The fact that you are horrified by some of your attractions shows your conscience is still speaking. Bring those attractions also into confession, do not entertain or feed them, and seek help to understand and starve them rather than justify them.

You ask why you had to be human. You were made human to know God, to be loved by Him, and to be transformed by Him. Your struggle does not mean He has abandoned you. It means you need Him every day. Keep returning, keep confessing, keep asking for a clean heart. He who calls you to purity is the same one who gives the power to walk in it, as you keep turning to Him.