We have read your confession with heavy hearts and with gratitude for your honesty before the Lord, and we join you in bringing this before Him together in Jesus' name. We do not take lightly that you have humbled yourself to admit these sins, and we want you to know that godly sorrow that leads to repentance is precious to God, while shame that drives you into hiding is not from Him. You mentioned going four months without falling and then stumbling again after a week, and we want to encourage you that this shows God has been working in you and giving you strength, and a stumble does not erase His work. Do not despair, but continue to press forward.
We must lovingly rebuke and correct what you have confessed because the Lord calls us to walk in light and truth. Watching pornography and masturbating with lust is sin before God. Jesus said in Matthew 5:28 that everyone who gazes at a woman to lust after her has committed adultery with her already in his heart. Pornography feeds that adultery of the heart, and it treats those made in God's image as objects for selfish desire rather than persons to be honored. Scripture teaches us to flee sexual immorality in 1 Corinthians 6:18 and that our bodies are a temple of the Holy Spirit in 1 Corinthians 6:19-20, and that sexual intimacy is designed by God to be enjoyed only within the lifelong covenant of marriage between a man and a woman as taught in Hebrews 13:4. What you described is fornication of the heart and impurity that God calls us to put to death in Colossians 3:5. We also must address the stalking and the dummy account. Creating a false identity to secretly watch someone you have feelings for is deception and does not reflect the love described in 1 Corinthians 13:4-6, nor the honesty commanded in Ephesians 4:25 to put away falsehood and speak truth. Even if your feelings feel strong, godly courtship with the goal of marriage to a fellow believer must be open, respectful, honest, and honoring of boundaries, not secretive or controlling. Stalking violates respect for another person and their privacy, and the Lord calls us to treat others as we want to be treated and to walk in integrity.
We want to assure you that forgiveness is available, but it is only through the name of Jesus Christ that we have access to the Father and can be saved. You said Lord, and we gently remind you that Jesus Himself said in John 14:6 that He is the way, the truth, and the life, and no one comes to the Father except through Him. In Acts 4:12 we are told there is salvation in no other name under heaven that is given among men by which we must be saved. To be forgiven and to have power over sin, we must confess with our mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in our heart that God raised Him from the dead as taught in Romans 10:9. If you have not yet fully entrusted your life to Jesus as your Savior and Lord, we urge you to do so now, turning from sin and trusting in His shed blood for your forgiveness. For those who are in Christ, we have the promise in 1 John 1:9 that if we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us the sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness, and in Psalm 103:12 that as far as the east is from the west, so far has He removed our transgressions from us. In Proverbs 28:13 we read that he who conceals his sins does not prosper, but whoever confesses and renounces them finds mercy.
We encourage you to walk in that mercy with practical repentance. Flee from temptation rather than fighting it up close in 1 Corinthians 6:18, which means removing access to pornography, installing filters, keeping devices in open areas, and avoiding isolation and idle time. Walk by the Spirit in Galatians 5:16 so you will not fulfill the lust of the flesh, filling your mind with what is pure and true in Philippians 4:8 and with the Word daily. Bring this struggle into the light with a mature Christian brother or pastor for accountability as taught in James 5:16 to confess your sins to one another and pray for one another that you may be healed. For the stalking, we urge you to permanently delete the dummy account, to not create another, to respect this woman's boundaries completely, and to repent of deception. If your feelings are to be pursued at all, it must be in an open and honorable way as a brother in Christ, and if she has not invited such attention, the loving thing is to release her to the Lord and pray for her good from a distance without intrusion.
We pray together for you now. Father, we come before You in the precious name of Jesus Christ, and we thank You for Your mercy that endures forever. We confess before You this sin of lust, pornography, and masturbation, and the sin of deception and stalking, and we ask You to forgive us through the blood of Jesus. Create in us a clean heart in Psalm 51:10 and renew a right spirit within us. Wash us and cleanse us, and help us to hate what You hate and love what You love. Lord, we ask that You do not let the consequences of these sins consume this dear one, but that You would discipline as a loving Father in Hebrews 12:6 and restore with gentleness. Give strength to flee temptation in 1 Corinthians 10:13, to resist the devil in James 4:7, and to walk in purity. Guard this young woman who was stalked, and protect her heart, and let no harm or fear come to her, and let this situation be covered by Your grace. Lead our brother into accountability, into honest fellowship, and into a deeper love for Jesus that makes sin lose its appeal. Fill him with Your Holy Spirit and with hope, reminding him that there is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus in Romans 8:1. We ask that You make his future relationships, if it is Your will for him to marry, to be centered on Christ and marked by honor, purity, and truth. We entrust him to Your keeping and Your transforming power. In Jesus' name we pray, amen.
We encourage you to stay in the Word daily, to pray continually, and to not let the enemy use shame to keep you isolated. God is faithful to complete the work He has begun in you. Keep rising after a fall, keep confessing quickly, and keep seeking Jesus above all else.