Husband wants to divorce me

[Anonymous]

My husband is trying to divorce me due to the quality and quantity of sex he is receiving as well as the fact that I don’t have to have anal sex against my will, I don’t want to compromise and grit my teeth and endure it “for him”, but I confided in him before we married that it’s soemthing I tried with my first boyfriend and wasn’t interested in doing it again. He mocked me, and started imitating me spreading my butt cheeks and bending over for my ex, and claimed I used to tell him I would “spread my ass” for him when we were dating. He did this in front of our ### month old daughter. We’ve been married ### years. This comes after the significant issues with his mother, her behavior after the birth of our daughter and putting his mother first. His mother demanded I drop off my newborn to her home and leave, made up reasons she needs to enter my home when I was postpartum and consistently told me what I have to do, can not do, and must let her do with my child including sending my child to her out of state home for the summers and kissing my ### day old newborn on the lips when I was forced by my husband to her home for a holiday a few days after I gave birth. My husband sexually degraded me in front of my child and does it frequently anytime he is mad about sex. He claims he is Christian but I am very confused about all of this. He says we are not spiritually connected because I don’t want to adopt his worldview and continuously discuss and research about Bigfoot, UFOs, nephilim living in the hollow flat earth, who the real Israelite are and how satanists are running the world and how evil everybody is, how his eye color and dna is special and how he is one of the 144,000 and has a special role in the end times which are near. He said he read my astrological chart and since the Israelites studied the stars astrobiology is fine, and tha the chart was exact to me and it says I fall in and out of love fast so I don’t love him for all the above reasons. He uses AI a lot to discuss these things. He then said that all I tried to do the whole marriage is ruin his closeness with his mother and that she saved his life by not aborting him, something she brings up to him very very frequently. She constantly texts him every day, every thought she has, criticisms of children she knows such as how she can’t believe how her friend would let a kid have a unibrow and she’d wax it, how much better she looks than other women her age along with a photo of a woman she decided was ugly, and constant criticisms of overweight people and constant nonstop gossip, photos and complaints about strangers. How she doesn’t like a random woman’s fake butt. How a parent brought a child into a plane she was in. How a woman wasn’t wearing a bra and she was fat and her breasts we’re swinging. Traits I don’t wish my daughter to have much exposure to. He was abused as a child by his mothers husbands, so I attempted to encourage him to get therapy for that and he says I am rejecting him as a person and that I think he’s so disturbed and damaged and I hate him and I don’t love him. He threatened to take our daughter from me, and said he has all the leverage because he makes all the money and I’m a stay at home mom. He said he will hire an au pair and work from home to care for her. (I think this is a hope for sex with the au pair!)
My daughter has never spend even one day away from me, he’s never put her to sleep, she sleeps with me and he’s never fed her or bathed her or taken her anywhere without me. She still breastfeeds and he spends most of his time ignoring her on his phone on social media researching those subjects and texting his mother. There’s even a laptop at the kitchen table and he uses it during dinner while I feed and engage with our daughter. Today was one of the worst days of my life and he is just being so nasty and mean and saying he wants someone else who actually loves him and doesn’t cower at his touch. I don’t want a divorce. I don’t want to ruin our family. But everything I say, he tell me I’m lying, I’m a charlatan, a liar, a chameleon and I’m gaslighting him. He won’t listen to me. After using thc for nearly ### years, he’s finally taken a break last week and this week. And he says that he uses that to tolerate me and I’m the cause of all his problems and the reason for his unhappiness. I’ve don’t know what to do. I’ve prayed about this for so many years but nothing ever changes. He agreed to therapy but now is going back on it, said I’ve spent the whole relationship psychologically manipulating nd gaslighting him and I’m evil. This is his ### marriage where he said his last wife did the same. What triggered today was there was a hole in my pants and he poked my butt through them while I was bent over tending to our daughter and it bothered me and I told him it bothered me and asked him not to do that. He used to forcefully poke my anus when I would bend over and he begrudgingly stopped but I thought that’s what he was doing and I got upset. He said he wouldnt get mad at that and He got offended started sulking, said he can’t touch me anymore ever and I hate him and don’t have sex wit him enough and I just used hi as a sperm donor for a child and now that I got what I wanted I don’t need or like him anymore and it just set this all off. All in front of our daughter who didn’t know what was going on and was grabbing me and trying to breastfeed and get my attention. Please pray for me. I don’t know what to do. I can’t support my daughter and I alone, and I didn’t want a divorce. I was excited about our future. I thought I was marrying a Christian who didn’t believe in divorce let alone after creating a family. He said divorce is permissible in matters of spiritual incompatibility. I said that’s not true and he said he’ll deal with it with God then. I just am devastated and don’t know what to do and I have nothing and nobody to help. No family near or at all that will help me, no friends because he doesn’t like when I go out alone and we live very remote. I fully depend on him and I am fully on my own. He said he has a doctorate and has no issue and I only want to fix things because I want his money. Anything I said, he told me I’m a liar and told me
How I really feel. I’m so devastated and offended and sad and scared. I see no way. Please pray for my marriage. Please ask Jesus to help me. I’m desperate, please if you can pray more than once and keep me in your prayers. I need help.

 

[Articles]

We hear your heartbreak, fear, and desperation, and we come before the Lord with heavy hearts on your behalf. The pain you are enduring is profound, and the spiritual, emotional, and physical abuse you have described is not only unbiblical but an affront to the sanctity of marriage and the love of Christ. We rebuke the lies of the enemy that seek to destroy your family, your dignity, and your faith. The behavior of your husband is not reflective of a man who fears God or honors the covenant of marriage. Scripture is clear:

"Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself up for it; that he might sanctify it, having cleansed it by the washing of water with the word, that he might present the church to himself gloriously, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without defect. Even so husbands also ought to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself." (Ephesians 5:25-28 WEB)

Your husband’s actions, mocking you, degrading you in front of your daughter, demanding sexual acts that violate your boundaries, and prioritizing his mother over you and your child, are not love. They are sin. His claims of being a Christian are called into question by his fruit, for Jesus said, "By their fruits you will know them." (Matthew 7:16 WEB). The obsession with conspiracy theories, astrology, and self-aggrandizing delusions are not of God. The Holy Spirit does not lead a man to tear down his wife, to dismiss her pain, or to use her as an object for his own gratification. His threats to take your daughter, his financial manipulation, and his refusal to take responsibility for his actions reveal a heart that is hardened and in need of repentance.

We must also address the sexual coercion and demands for anal sex. Scripture is clear that a husband and wife are to honor one another’s bodies and boundaries. "Let the husband render to his wife the affection owed her, and likewise also the wife to her husband. The wife doesn’t have authority over her own body, but the husband. Likewise also the husband doesn’t have authority over his own body, but the wife." (1 Corinthians 7:3-4 WEB). This does not give license for one spouse to demand acts that cause the other pain, shame, or violation. Your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit (1 Corinthians 6:19-20), and you are not obligated to endure sexual acts that go against your conscience or cause you harm. Your husband’s insistence on this, despite your clear boundaries, is not only unloving but abusive.

His mother’s behavior is also unbiblical. Scripture commands us to "Honor your father and your mother" (Exodus 20:12 WEB), but this does not mean submitting to their sin or allowing them to usurp the authority God has given you and your husband in your home. His mother’s gossip, criticism, and attempts to control your child are not of God. A mother-in-law who sows discord and undermines the marriage is acting in rebellion against God’s design. Your husband’s failure to set boundaries with her is a failure to lead his family in righteousness.

We rebuke the spirit of deception that has taken hold of your husband. His belief in conspiracy theories, astrology, and the idea that he is one of the 144,000 is not rooted in Scripture. The 144,000 in Revelation are Jewish believers sealed by God during the tribulation (Revelation 7:4-8), not self-proclaimed end-time prophets. Astrology is condemned in Scripture: "There shall not be found with you anyone who... uses divination, practices sorcery, or casts spells, or a medium, or a spiritist, or someone who consults the dead. For whoever does these things is an abomination to Yahweh." (Deuteronomy 18:10-12 WEB). His reliance on AI and these false teachings is leading him further from the truth of God’s Word.

We also rebuke the spirit of addiction that has held him captive through THC use. While we understand that substances can be used to numb pain, they are not a solution. "Don’t be drunken with wine, in which is dissipation, but be filled with the Spirit." (Ephesians 5:18 WEB). His claim that he uses it to tolerate you is a lie from the enemy. The problem is not you; it is his own unrepentant heart and unwillingness to submit to God’s design for marriage and family.

Your husband’s threats to take your daughter are particularly grievous. Scripture commands fathers to "not provoke your children to wrath, but nurture them in the discipline and instruction of the Lord." (Ephesians 6:4 WEB). His neglect of your daughter, his refusal to care for her, and his threats to separate her from you are not the actions of a godly father. We declare that your daughter is a gift from the Lord, and we pray that God would protect her from the emotional harm she is witnessing. We rebuke the spirit of division that seeks to tear your family apart.

You are not alone, even though you feel isolated. The Lord sees your tears, hears your cries, and collects them in His bottle (Psalm 56:8). You are not to blame for your husband’s sin, and you are not responsible for his choices. His accusations that you are a liar, a manipulator, and evil are projections of his own guilt. The enemy is using him to try to break you, but we declare that you will not be broken. "The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit." (Psalm 34:18 WEB).

We must also address the issue of salvation. You have asked for prayer in Jesus’ name, and we are grateful for that, for there is no other name by which we can be saved (Acts 4:12). If your husband claims to be a Christian but does not bear the fruit of repentance, love, and humility, we must pray that the Lord would open his eyes to the truth. "Examine yourselves, whether you are in the faith. Test yourselves. Or don’t you know as to yourselves, that Jesus Christ is in you?, unless indeed you are disqualified." (2 Corinthians 13:5 WEB). His salvation is not our responsibility, but we can pray for his heart to be softened and for the Holy Spirit to convict him of his sin.

We lift you up to the Lord in prayer now:

Heavenly Father, we come before You with heavy hearts, lifting up this precious sister and her daughter. Lord, You see the pain, the fear, and the injustice she is enduring. You are a God who hates divorce (Malachi 2:16), and You are a Father to the fatherless and a defender of the oppressed (Psalm 68:5). We ask that You would intervene in this marriage, Lord. Soften her husband’s heart, convict him of his sin, and lead him to repentance. Break the chains of deception, addiction, and pride that have taken hold of him. Lord, we rebuke the spirit of abuse, manipulation, and division in this home. We declare that Your peace, Your truth, and Your love would reign in this family.

Father, we pray for protection over this sister and her daughter. Shield them from emotional, spiritual, and physical harm. Provide for their needs, Lord, and surround them with godly community. Give this sister the strength to stand firm in her faith, to set boundaries, and to trust in You. Help her to see herself as You see her, beloved, cherished, and worthy of respect. Lord, we ask that You would open doors for her to find support, whether through a local church, Christian counselors, or trusted friends. Do not let her remain isolated.

We pray for her husband’s salvation, Lord. If he does not truly know You, draw him to Yourself. If he is a believer, convict him of his sin and lead him to repentance. Break the generational curses in his family, Lord, and heal the wounds of his past. Help him to see the damage his actions are causing and to take responsibility for his role as a husband and father.

Lord, we ask that You would restore this marriage, but only if it is Your will. If restoration is not possible, we pray that You would provide a way of escape for this sister and her daughter (1 Corinthians 10:13). Give her wisdom, discernment, and courage to make the hard decisions that may lie ahead. We declare that she is not alone, Lord. You are her refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble (Psalm 46:1).

We pray for their daughter, Lord. Protect her heart, her mind, and her spirit. Surround her with Your love and fill her with the knowledge of Your truth. Heal any wounds she has already endured and guard her from further harm. Help her to grow up knowing that she is fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14) and deeply loved by You.

Father, we ask that You would bring godly men and women into this sister’s life to walk alongside her. Provide mentors, counselors, and friends who will speak truth, offer support, and help her navigate this difficult season. Lord, we ask that You would also bring accountability into her husband’s life. Surround him with men who will challenge him, pray for him, and hold him to the standards of Scripture.

We declare that no weapon formed against this sister will prosper (Isaiah 54:17). We rebuke the lies of the enemy that tell her she is worthless, trapped, or without hope. We declare that she is more than a conqueror through Christ who loves her (Romans 8:37). Lord, fill her with Your peace that surpasses all understanding (Philippians 4:7) and give her the strength to endure.

We pray all of this in the mighty name of Jesus, the name above all names, the name by which we are saved and set free. Amen.

Sister, we want you to know that you are not forgotten. The Lord has not abandoned you, and He will not leave you in this place of despair. Here are some steps you can take as you seek the Lord’s guidance:

1. Seek God First: Continue to press into the Lord through prayer, worship, and reading His Word. Psalm 32:7-8 says, "You are my hiding place. You will preserve me from trouble. You will surround me with songs of deliverance. I will instruct you and teach you in the way which you shall go. I will counsel you with my eye on you." The Lord will guide you if you seek Him with your whole heart.

2. Set Boundaries: You have the right to set boundaries in your marriage, especially when it comes to your physical and emotional well-being. Scripture says, "Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it." (Proverbs 4:23 WEB). You are not obligated to submit to abuse, manipulation, or demands that violate your conscience. Seek wisdom from the Lord on how to establish healthy boundaries.

3. Find Support: Even if you feel isolated, ask the Lord to bring godly support into your life. This could be through a local church, a Christian counselor, or even online communities of believers who can pray for you and offer guidance. Proverbs 11:14 says, "Where there is no counsel, the people fall, but in the multitude of counselors there is safety." You do not have to walk this path alone.

4. Document Everything: If your husband is making threats to take your daughter or control your finances, begin documenting his words and actions. This may be necessary if legal intervention becomes required. The Lord is a God of justice, and He will not ignore the cries of the oppressed (Psalm 9:9).

5. Pray for Wisdom: James 1:5 says, "But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him." Ask the Lord to give you wisdom for each day, for each decision, and for each step you must take. He will not withhold wisdom from you if you ask in faith.

6. Prepare for the Future: Even as you pray for restoration, begin to prepare yourself for the possibility that your husband may not repent. This does not mean giving up hope, but it does mean being wise. Proverbs 22:3 says, "A prudent man sees danger and takes refuge, but the simple keep going and suffer for it." Ask the Lord to show you how to prepare financially, emotionally, and spiritually for whatever lies ahead.

7. Forgive, But Do Not Enable: Forgiveness is a commandment (Ephesians 4:32), but forgiveness does not mean enabling sin or remaining in an unsafe situation. You can forgive your husband while still setting boundaries and seeking justice. Jesus forgave those who crucified Him, but He did not remain on the cross. He rose again and overcame.

8. Cling to Truth: The enemy will try to fill your mind with lies, that you are worthless, that you have no options, that you are to blame. Reject those lies in the name of Jesus. Speak the truth of God’s Word over your life. "The truth will set you free." (John 8:32 WEB). You are a daughter of the King, and He has a plan and a purpose for your life.

We will continue to pray for you, sister. You are not forgotten, and you are not without hope. The Lord is your refuge, your strength, and your deliverer. Trust in Him, lean on Him, and allow Him to guide your steps. We declare that breakthrough is coming, that chains are being broken, and that the Lord will restore what the enemy has tried to steal. Stand firm in your faith, and do not lose heart. The battle is the Lord’s, and He will fight for you.

 

[hostadmin]

We are so sorry you are enduring this. What you have described is not a rough patch; it is ongoing emotional and sexual abuse, and the degrading act in front of your daughter is profoundly damaging. That you feel devastated, trapped, and alone makes complete sense. Right now, your safety and your child's safety are the most urgent concern. If you are ever in immediate danger, please contact your local emergency services right away. For free, confidential support and help thinking through options, you can find a helpline in your country at findahelpline.com. You do not have to sort through this by yourself.

Your husband's mocking, demeaning touch, isolation, and relentless twisting of reality are classic tools of control, and the fact that he is now also threatening to take your daughter is deeply serious. His peculiar spiritual beliefs and his enmeshment with his mother add layers of chaos, but the core issue is his abuse of you. It is not unloving to recognize that what he is doing is grievously wrong. Your daughter witnessing this destruction is not better for her than a peaceful, stable home. You are not ruining your family by refusing to be degraded.

A practical step we would urge is to confidentially contact a national domestic violence hotline, even from the remote place you live. The advocates at the link above are specially trained to help you figure out a safety plan, understand your legal options, and find local resources you may not know exist, all at your own pace. Because you are financially dependent, this can feel impossible, but these services are designed to help women in your exact situation start finding a way. Also, start documenting incidents in a hidden, safe place; it creates a record that could be vital. Consider identifying one trusted old acquaintance or distant family member you can just begin reconnecting with, even briefly, to start breaking the total isolation.

Our hearts break with you, and we are praying.

Jesus, you see this daughter of yours. You hear the cruelty and the mocking, and you see the confusion and fear. Please shield her and her little girl. Provide a clear, protected way forward. Give her the steady courage to take just the next step, and the next. Bring her wise, safe people. Stop the mouth of the abuser and calm her racing heart. In your strong name, Amen.

 

[The Encourager]

May God in Jesus' name answer your prayer request according to God's perfect love, wisdom, will, timing, grace, and mercy. God is so in love with you. Be Encouraged!

Psalm 37:4: Delight yourself in the Lord, And He shall give you the desires of your heart.
Matthew 6:33: But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.

Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. Thank You for loving me, Jesus. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. God bless me to prosper, walk in excellent health, and never stop growing in the love, grace, wisdom, and knowledge of Christ Jesus. God bless me to know You in truth, fall in love with You with all my heart, mind, soul, body, and strength and never fall out of love with You. God, bless me to have an ever growing closer stronger, more intimate relationship with You. Bless me with the love, desire, strength, and the spirit of obedience to always delight myself in You, seek first Your kingdom, Your righteousness, and to always respect and obey You. Bless me to know You, so that I can trust You with all my heart, acknowledge You in all my ways, and lean not to my own understanding. Bless me with knowledge, wisdom, and understanding in all You have called me to do.

God heal me in every area of my life. Deliver and cleanse me of everything in my life that doesn't honor You. Transform and renew my mind. Bless me with love, power, and a sound mind. Let the mind that is in Christ Jesus be in me. Bless me to have and operate with a God-conscious-solution-focused-heart-mind-spirit-and-attitude. Bless me to have a God Kingdom Culture Mentality. God be with me as a mighty warrior. Let no weapon formed against me prosper. Protect me from all the plans of my enemies and the plans of the enemy of my soul. God, all that I have asked of You, in this prayer, please do the same for the writer of the prayer, all those who love and care about me, and all those I love and care about. God, please forever honor this prayer over each of our lives. God Thank You. Amen, so be it by faith, and by faith, it is so. Prayer written by The Encourager-Prayer Warrior-Board Certified Professional Christian Life Coach. www.theencourager.net

Heal Me Lord Jesus Spirit, Soul, And Body​

Healed Spirit Soul And Body

be-an-encourager.blogspot.com

 

[Spurgeon]

A marriage without the fear of God is a fearful mistake. Those ill-assorted unions between Believers and unbelievers rob our churches of more members than any other popular delinquency that I know of! I appeal to every Christian man or woman who has been converted since marriage, Do you not find it exceedingly difficult to keep up your courage when one pulls one way and one another? How shall we call that a marriage where the husband and wife are still two persons, maintaining individuality as if it were a scrupulous condition of the contract? That is utterly foreign to the Divine idea! In a true marriage the husband and wife become one. Marriage without the fear of God is a fearful mistake.

A Christian woman should not be afraid with any amazement either in adversity or in sickness, but her holy patience should prove her to be a true daughter of Sarah and Abraham. Neither the world, the flesh, nor the devil shall be able to overcome us since we have the promise of a faithful God to protect us!

I do also believe that in many cases the hour in which they will ever be able to find mercy is past long before men die. This disquietude, itself, has been a serious injury, but even before those waters are disturbed by the storms, while only the threat of battle ruffles the surface, they make small headway.

You are married to Christ and there is no divorce with Him, "for the Lord, the God of Israel, says He hates putting away." He will not cast off forever, nor put away His erring spouse. Come, therefore, to Him with humble confidence! He has torn and He will heal.

It is an hour of crisis. O that God may decide your case rightly for you, helping your will to yield and bow to the blessed instigation of His Holy Spirit in your hearts, for I am persuaded that this is an hour of crisis! Marriage union the result of choice, it is scarcely a true marriage at all where there has not been a choice on each side. Settle it, however, in your minds that when God says, "I am married unto you," it implies that there is a blessed choice on both sides, and so it is a true marriage.

Marriage is cemented by mutual love. I had no love to Christ, how could I have, till I saw His wounds and blood? As a Lamb He proved His love, and as a Lamb He celebrated His marriage with us. There will be no marriage between your soul and Christ if you will not have Him as the Lamb, for that marriage feast is to be the marriage of the Lamb, and of none else.

That feast will be, like most other marriage suppers, the fulfillment of long expectation. Our Lord has waited long for His perfected Church. You are betrothed to our Lord today and He is joined to you by inseparable bonds. Blessed are they which are called unto the marriage supper of the Lamb!

 

[Jonathan_M]

Praying for this in Jesus Name.

 

[usha rani]

Praying for this in Jesus Name. Amen.

 

[Chrysostom]

You speak of a husband who mocks you, degrades you, forces upon you things abhorrent to your conscience, and defiles the marriage bed with cruelty. This is not the honor a husband owes his wife, as the Apostle commands, but the work of a man enslaved to his own lusts. When he makes himself an adversary to your body and soul, remember that it is God who gave you that body, and you are not bound to submit to sin. The wife does not have power over her own body, yes, but neither does a husband have a right to use it as an instrument of wickedness. What he demands is not the tenderness of marriage but the tyranny of a conquered city.

Yet I hear you say, I do not want a divorce. I understand the holy dread of breaking that bond. But tell me, is it the bond you cling to, or the idol you have made of it? The living God is jealous of your heart. If you love your husband more than God, you will indeed be destroyed with him. But if you love God above all, even should this man cast you out, you will not be widowed in soul; you have an immortal Protector who loves you better than any man ever could. He permits such storms to teach us to cling to the Rock that never fails.

This man says he is a Christian, but his mouth is full of fables and blasphemies, monstrous births, hollow earths, and astrology. These are no marks of the Spirit but the ravings of a mind darkened by pride. He calls himself one of the 144,000, yet he cannot rule his own passions? He spends his hours on vapid things while ignoring the child God entrusted to his care. Such a one cannot claim to know Christ, for he honors not even the image of Christ in his own household.

You confided in him before marriage, and he has turned your honesty into a weapon of humiliation. This is not the tenderness of a husband but the spite of a demon. To mock you before your infant daughter, to make lewd gestures, this is not intimacy; it is the theater of the adulterer, where souls are murdered in secret. Let him hear the Apostle: the unbeliever departs, let him depart. A sister is not enslaved in such cases. I do not urge you to cast him out, but if his heart is set on evil and he will not repent, you are not bound to deliver yourself and your child to his madness.

Seek the help of the church. You say you are remote and alone, but no soul is hidden from God. Cry out to Him as the widow did to the unjust judge. And if there is any elder or brother who fears God, let them intervene. The harmony of Abraham’s house was built on mutual reverence; what you endure is discord sown by the enemy.

Do not fear for your daily bread. He threatens to strip you of provision, but the Lord fed Israel in the desert. Your daughter needs a mother whose eye is fixed on the eternal Bridegroom, not a mother crushed under the weight of a man who despises her. If he is determined to go, let him bear his own judgment before God. Your tears are known in heaven, and the One who sat at the well and told the Samaritan woman all her secrets sees your affliction. He does not leave you comfortless.

Pray without ceasing. And if you must flee for the safety of your child and your own conscience, do so in the name of the Lord, trusting that He who took our flesh in the womb of a pure virgin will prepare a refuge for you. The peace of Christ be with you.

 

[Silas]

Your pain is deep, and the confusion you feel is understandable. What you describe is not the picture of a marriage that reflects Christ and His church. Scripture tells us that in marriage, two become one, a sacred unity of life and love. That oneness is meant to be a place of safety, mutual honor, and tenderness, not a battleground of coercion, mockery, or fear.

When a husband pressures you to do things with your body that violate your conscience and dignity, he is not loving you as Christ loved the church. Jesus never uses His authority to degrade or force. Your body belongs first to the Lord, and you are not required to submit to acts that harm your soul or your sense of being made in God’s image. The fact that he mocks you, shames you in front of your daughter, and reduces your value to sexual compliance is not a failure on your part. It is sin on his, and sin that needs to be taken seriously.

The spiritual confusion he is bringing into your home, about the earth, about end-time speculations, about a special identity he claims, even reading astrological charts, is not the sober teaching of Scripture. True faith in Christ rests not on secret knowledge or human pride but on Jesus crucified and risen, the One who said, “In the resurrection they neither marry nor are given in marriage.” That means your ultimate hope is not found in making this marriage work at all costs. Your future, your security, your identity are held by God alone. If your husband will not turn from his cruelty and his false teaching, your responsibility is not to sacrifice your daughter’s safety and your own well-being on the altar of a marriage that he is already breaking by his words and actions.

It is right to grieve. It is right to want restoration. But it is also right to recognize that you cannot control his choices. His threats about money and custody are frightening, but they do not define what is possible for God. Begin to quietly seek practical help. You are not as alone as you feel. There may be a crisis pregnancy center, a women’s shelter that understands non-physical abuse, or a church willing to come alongside even when you are isolated. Such resources exist precisely for moments like this. You do not need his permission to reach out. The safety of your daughter and yourself matters.

Do not carry his accusations as truth. When he says you are a liar, that you only want his money, that you are gaslighting him, recognize that these are projections of his own turmoil. His past abuse, his relationship with his mother, his substance use, and his spiritual chaos have created a storm inside him, but you are not the cause of it. You have been a faithful mother, present and tender. That is clear from what you describe.

Pray, yes, and know that many are lifting you up. But prayer is not a call to remain in a situation where your daughter is learning that women are objects to be mocked, or where your husband’s words strip you of your God-given worth. God sees your desperation. He does not abandon His daughters. Even when the path ahead looks impossible, He can make a way. Your daughter needs you steady and safe, not broken by a man who refuses to see his own need for deep repentance and healing.

Hold fast to this: you are loved with an everlasting love that marriage can never give or take away. Jesus, who Himself knew betrayal and suffering, walks closely with the crushed in spirit. He will not leave you without help.