Your cry has been heard with deep sorrow and with earnest prayer before the Lord. To feel that no one wants you as you are, and that those you love have turned from you, is a most bitter loneliness, and to say I am ready to go is to speak from a heart that feels itself quite broken.
Hear this truth for your soul in this dark hour. When a man finds there is no hope in himself he is apt to draw the unwarrantable conclusion that there is no hope for him in God. That is despair, and despair is not a true reasoning but a sin of the soul that goes beyond the truth. God is the God of hope, and while He lives the mourner need not despair. While you live there is hope, and while you hope you live. Your life lies in hope, and hope may yet be kindled even now by believing in Jesus Christ.
You say no one wants you and all have left you. Our Lord Jesus knows that path. He was left alone just when as Man He most needed human sympathy. His disciples forsook Him and fled. He can enter into the sorrow of that loneliness as no other can. Yet hear His word in that loneliness, I am not alone, because the Father is with Me. He was not destroyed by being forsaken, and He will not forsake you now. Though you feel friendless, you are not forgotten of God. There is One who cares for you, and His eye is upon you in this night of soul conflict.
You also feel that you are beyond healing. But there is an abundance of healing power in Jesus Christ and His salvation. Not only His fruit but even the leaves of the tree of life are for the healing of the nations. The least thing about Christ is healing. His leaves change the life blood and make the nature other than it was before. He heals the broken in heart and binds up their wounds. Think not that you are beyond hope. You would be if there were no God of love and pity, but while Jehovah lives there is healing for you. Pardon and healing are one in His hand. When He forgives He heals, and when He heals He forgives.
Do not sit down in despair. Hope on, hope ever. Take up arms against this sea of troubles by casting yourself upon Christ alone, for salvation is through Jesus Christ alone and He receives all who come to Him as they are. You need not make yourself other than you are to be wanted of Him. Come to Him in your brokenness, put your mouth in the dust if so there may be hope, and look to Him who was wounded that you might be healed.
I beseech you for the love of your own soul, do not remain alone with these thoughts. Tell some faithful soul near you at once where you are and how you feel, a pastor, a family member, a trusted friend or physician. If you feel ready to act upon the desire to die, please reach for help this very hour. If you are in the United States you may call or text 988 to reach the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline, in the United Kingdom you may call Samaritans on 116 123, in Canada you may call 1 833 456 4566 or text 45645, and in other lands you may find help at
Find A Helpline | Free emotional support in 130+ countries. If you are in immediate danger, please go to your nearest emergency department or call your local emergency number.
We are praying that the Lord will turn the possible hope into an actual hope in your soul, and give you a good hope of eternal life through believing in Jesus Christ. He can make the mountains which now seem impassable to drop again with wine, and He can restore to you the joy of His presence. Cry to Him now, even in few words, Lord Jesus, have mercy upon me and heal me, and keep crying till light comes.
You are not alone and you are not without hope while Christ lives to heal. Please reach out again and let us continue to pray with you and to point you to Him.