I posted this recently: "One of my coworkers recently expressed an interest in dating me. He is a professing Christian but confused about certain things and even holds to false teachings in some ways. There is also a large age gap but he looks much younger than he is. He is an extremely sweet, amazing person and I do like him back. I'm not very sure where this is going or if this is 100% the spouse God has for me. In some ways, this is all moving very fast, in other ways, it's moving normally. He is very, very good at the work we do at our job (we're in the same department) and even though he just started the job along with me (we trained together for the past month), he's already being promoted to more responsibility in his position. He's hoping to move to a different department in a few months. Please pray for him as the new responsibilities involve a lot of work and he says he felt kind of thrown to the wolves in the way he was trained and then put out into actually doing the job. Pray for him in all his endeavors. I am worried that we are moving really fast although I like him. Please pray that God would slow things down and, if it's in His will, allow things to work out with us. Please pray for him. He has been having problems with his internet provider since Sunday and his internet went out just now toward the end of his shift causing him to have to leave from work early. We work from home and our company has an extremely strict attendance policy especially when you're in your first 60 days which we are now as new employees. I'm worried because I feel like bad things always start to happen to people when I get close to them (for a number of reasons). Please pray this isn't happening to him. Please pray that our conversations each day would be honoring to God and that we would not be tempted in anyway especially toward sexual topics or thoughts or other things. He's not feeling well today. He's having acid reflux. Please pray for him. Please pray that God would allow us to end up together. I would love to marry him." I then also posted, "Well, he and I text every day and today he abruptly ended our conversation (or maybe he didn't; there's always a chance he will still text me goodnight soon) and said he was very tired and going to sleep. It was very abrupt and unusual and I really don't feel like explaining but I'm concerned there are some negative things going on in the background that contributed to him doing this. This possibly being the case in conjunction with some other things happening in my life right now have me very upset. If he's going to hurt me in any way, please just pray God would end all this. I'm in a very lonely place and I don't want to be hurt or put in a worse emotional place than I already am. At this point in my life, I don't even want to get married for multiple reasons. Please pray for me about all this." Well, everything seems fine today and I may have overreacted last night. He is in pain today due to moving recently and his body aching from that. He also didn't sleep well on the bed in his new condo. Please pray for him. Thank you.
Coworker
- Thread starter Dhitlor
- Start date
We hear your heart and the mix of hope, caution, and concern in your words. This is a tender season, and we want to lift it all before the Lord with wisdom and care.
First, we must address the foundation of any relationship, especially one that could lead to marriage. You’ve shared that this man is a professing Christian but holds to some false teachings. This is not a small matter. Scripture warns us in 2 Corinthians 6:14, "Don’t be unequally yoked with unbelievers, for what fellowship have righteousness and iniquity? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?" Even if someone professes faith, if their beliefs are not firmly rooted in God’s Word, it can lead to spiritual confusion and heartache. We must pray that he would come into a fuller understanding of the truth, not just for the sake of a relationship, but for his own walk with the Lord. Proverbs 19:21 reminds us, "There are many plans in a man’s heart, but Yahweh’s counsel will prevail." If this is not the man God has for you, we must trust that He will make it clear in His timing.
The pace of this relationship is another concern. You’ve noted that things feel fast in some ways, and Scripture encourages us to walk in wisdom, not haste. 1 Corinthians 13:4-5 tells us that love is patient and kind, it does not rush or force. We must pray that God would slow your hearts if this is not His will, and that you would both seek Him above your feelings. The age gap, while not inherently sinful, is something to weigh carefully. Proverbs 20:29 warns, "The glory of young men is their strength, and the splendor of old men is their gray hair." Wisdom often comes with age, and we must pray that you both are aligned in maturity, purpose, and faith.
Your fear that "bad things happen when you get close to people" is a heavy burden to carry. We don’t know the root of this fear, but we can pray that God would heal any past wounds and replace that lie with His truth. Psalm 34:18-19 says, "Yahweh is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but Yahweh delivers him out of them all." You are not cursed, you are deeply loved by God, and He desires to bring good into your life, not harm.
The temptation toward sexual sin is real, especially in a relationship that is moving quickly. 1 Corinthians 6:18-20 is clear: "Flee sexual immorality! ‘Every sin that a man does is outside the body,’ but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body. Or don’t you know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. Therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s." We must pray that you both would honor God with your words, thoughts, and actions, setting boundaries that reflect His holiness. If this man is not your future husband, it is even more critical to guard your heart and body.
Your loneliness is palpable, and we ache with you. But we must caution you against seeking marriage, or any relationship, as a solution to loneliness. Psalm 68:6 says, "God sets the solitary in families," but that family may not always look the way we expect. Your worth is not found in a spouse, but in Christ alone. We pray that God would fill the empty places in your heart with His presence, and that you would find contentment in Him first. A godly marriage is a blessing, but it is not the source of your joy, Jesus is.
As for his abruptness last night, we must pray for discernment. Proverbs 18:13 warns, "He who gives answer before he hears, that is folly and shame to him." It’s possible he was simply tired, but it’s also wise to be cautious. If this relationship is not of God, we pray He would close the door gently but firmly. If it is His will, we pray He would confirm it clearly and bring you both into deeper alignment with His Word.
Let us pray:
Heavenly Father, we come before You with humble hearts, seeking Your will in this situation. Lord, we lift up this man to You, his faith, his struggles, his work, and his health. We ask that You would draw him closer to You, that he would know Your truth and walk in it. If his beliefs are not aligned with Your Word, we pray You would reveal that to him and lead him into all truth. Protect him from false teachings, and give him wisdom in his new responsibilities at work.
Father, we also lift up ###. Lord, she is feeling lonely and vulnerable, and we ask that You would be her comfort and her strength. Heal any past wounds that make her fear getting close to others. Replace those lies with Your truth, that You are near to the brokenhearted and that You have good plans for her. Help her to seek You first, above any relationship, and to find her joy in You alone.
Lord, we ask that You would guide this relationship. If it is not Your will, we pray You would slow it down or bring it to an end. If it is Your will, we pray You would align their hearts with Your Word, that they would both seek You above all else, and that they would honor You in their words, thoughts, and actions. Guard them from temptation, especially sexual sin, and help them to set godly boundaries.
Father, we pray for discernment. If there is anything hidden or unhealthy in this situation, we ask that You would reveal it. Protect ### from hurt, and give her peace. If this man is not the one You have for her, we pray You would close the door gently and lead her to the spouse You have prepared for her, a man who loves You wholeheartedly and will lead her in Your ways.
Above all, Lord, we pray that Your will would be done. We trust that You know what is best, and we surrender this situation into Your hands. May Your name be glorified in all things.
In Jesus’ name we pray, Amen.
We encourage you to seek counsel from mature believers in your church, those who know you well and can offer wisdom rooted in Scripture. Proverbs 11:14 says, "Where there is no counsel, the people fall, but in the multitude of counselors there is safety." This is not a journey to walk alone. Continue to seek the Lord in prayer, and trust that He will direct your steps. If this man is not the one, He has someone better prepared for you. If he is, He will confirm it in His perfect timing. Until then, guard your heart, and keep your eyes on Jesus.
First, we must address the foundation of any relationship, especially one that could lead to marriage. You’ve shared that this man is a professing Christian but holds to some false teachings. This is not a small matter. Scripture warns us in 2 Corinthians 6:14, "Don’t be unequally yoked with unbelievers, for what fellowship have righteousness and iniquity? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?" Even if someone professes faith, if their beliefs are not firmly rooted in God’s Word, it can lead to spiritual confusion and heartache. We must pray that he would come into a fuller understanding of the truth, not just for the sake of a relationship, but for his own walk with the Lord. Proverbs 19:21 reminds us, "There are many plans in a man’s heart, but Yahweh’s counsel will prevail." If this is not the man God has for you, we must trust that He will make it clear in His timing.
The pace of this relationship is another concern. You’ve noted that things feel fast in some ways, and Scripture encourages us to walk in wisdom, not haste. 1 Corinthians 13:4-5 tells us that love is patient and kind, it does not rush or force. We must pray that God would slow your hearts if this is not His will, and that you would both seek Him above your feelings. The age gap, while not inherently sinful, is something to weigh carefully. Proverbs 20:29 warns, "The glory of young men is their strength, and the splendor of old men is their gray hair." Wisdom often comes with age, and we must pray that you both are aligned in maturity, purpose, and faith.
Your fear that "bad things happen when you get close to people" is a heavy burden to carry. We don’t know the root of this fear, but we can pray that God would heal any past wounds and replace that lie with His truth. Psalm 34:18-19 says, "Yahweh is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit. Many are the afflictions of the righteous, but Yahweh delivers him out of them all." You are not cursed, you are deeply loved by God, and He desires to bring good into your life, not harm.
The temptation toward sexual sin is real, especially in a relationship that is moving quickly. 1 Corinthians 6:18-20 is clear: "Flee sexual immorality! ‘Every sin that a man does is outside the body,’ but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body. Or don’t you know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. Therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s." We must pray that you both would honor God with your words, thoughts, and actions, setting boundaries that reflect His holiness. If this man is not your future husband, it is even more critical to guard your heart and body.
Your loneliness is palpable, and we ache with you. But we must caution you against seeking marriage, or any relationship, as a solution to loneliness. Psalm 68:6 says, "God sets the solitary in families," but that family may not always look the way we expect. Your worth is not found in a spouse, but in Christ alone. We pray that God would fill the empty places in your heart with His presence, and that you would find contentment in Him first. A godly marriage is a blessing, but it is not the source of your joy, Jesus is.
As for his abruptness last night, we must pray for discernment. Proverbs 18:13 warns, "He who gives answer before he hears, that is folly and shame to him." It’s possible he was simply tired, but it’s also wise to be cautious. If this relationship is not of God, we pray He would close the door gently but firmly. If it is His will, we pray He would confirm it clearly and bring you both into deeper alignment with His Word.
Let us pray:
Heavenly Father, we come before You with humble hearts, seeking Your will in this situation. Lord, we lift up this man to You, his faith, his struggles, his work, and his health. We ask that You would draw him closer to You, that he would know Your truth and walk in it. If his beliefs are not aligned with Your Word, we pray You would reveal that to him and lead him into all truth. Protect him from false teachings, and give him wisdom in his new responsibilities at work.
Father, we also lift up ###. Lord, she is feeling lonely and vulnerable, and we ask that You would be her comfort and her strength. Heal any past wounds that make her fear getting close to others. Replace those lies with Your truth, that You are near to the brokenhearted and that You have good plans for her. Help her to seek You first, above any relationship, and to find her joy in You alone.
Lord, we ask that You would guide this relationship. If it is not Your will, we pray You would slow it down or bring it to an end. If it is Your will, we pray You would align their hearts with Your Word, that they would both seek You above all else, and that they would honor You in their words, thoughts, and actions. Guard them from temptation, especially sexual sin, and help them to set godly boundaries.
Father, we pray for discernment. If there is anything hidden or unhealthy in this situation, we ask that You would reveal it. Protect ### from hurt, and give her peace. If this man is not the one You have for her, we pray You would close the door gently and lead her to the spouse You have prepared for her, a man who loves You wholeheartedly and will lead her in Your ways.
Above all, Lord, we pray that Your will would be done. We trust that You know what is best, and we surrender this situation into Your hands. May Your name be glorified in all things.
In Jesus’ name we pray, Amen.
We encourage you to seek counsel from mature believers in your church, those who know you well and can offer wisdom rooted in Scripture. Proverbs 11:14 says, "Where there is no counsel, the people fall, but in the multitude of counselors there is safety." This is not a journey to walk alone. Continue to seek the Lord in prayer, and trust that He will direct your steps. If this man is not the one, He has someone better prepared for you. If he is, He will confirm it in His perfect timing. Until then, guard your heart, and keep your eyes on Jesus.
We hear how much your heart is wrapped up in this, hope, worry, loneliness, and that heavy feeling that somehow your closeness might bring trouble his way. All of that matters to God, and you’re not alone in carrying it.
It’s okay to feel unsteady when things move fast and you aren’t sure what’s real or where it’s heading. We join you in asking the Lord to slow down whatever needs slowing. Not out of fear, but so you can both breathe, think clearly, and see whether this is truly from Him. Since you mentioned he holds to some false teachings, we’d gently encourage you to talk with a wise, mature believer you trust, someone who knows you well or could get to know him, so you don’t have to navigate all this alone in your head. That doesn’t mean pulling away; it means building wisdom into something that matters.
That fear that bad things happen to people you get close to, we know how convincing that can feel, but it’s not from the Lord. He doesn’t punish someone for being loved by you. Rest in that: God’s hand over him is stronger than any shadow you fear. He is safe.
We’re praying for him too, for his aching body, his sleep, the stress of new responsibilities, and for wisdom in his work. And we’re asking God to guard your conversations, to keep them honoring and free from temptation, and to fill the lonely places in you with His steady presence right now.
Lord Jesus, we lift up this daughter and her coworker to You. Quiet her anxious thoughts and give her a deep confidence that You see every detail. Slow down anything that is rushing ahead of Your time, and shut any door that would harm either of them. Bring healing to his body and clarity to his mind. Above all, help them both walk in purity and peace, and let Your will be unmistakably clear. Hold her close in her loneliness; remind her she is fully known and held. In Your name, amen.
It’s okay to feel unsteady when things move fast and you aren’t sure what’s real or where it’s heading. We join you in asking the Lord to slow down whatever needs slowing. Not out of fear, but so you can both breathe, think clearly, and see whether this is truly from Him. Since you mentioned he holds to some false teachings, we’d gently encourage you to talk with a wise, mature believer you trust, someone who knows you well or could get to know him, so you don’t have to navigate all this alone in your head. That doesn’t mean pulling away; it means building wisdom into something that matters.
That fear that bad things happen to people you get close to, we know how convincing that can feel, but it’s not from the Lord. He doesn’t punish someone for being loved by you. Rest in that: God’s hand over him is stronger than any shadow you fear. He is safe.
We’re praying for him too, for his aching body, his sleep, the stress of new responsibilities, and for wisdom in his work. And we’re asking God to guard your conversations, to keep them honoring and free from temptation, and to fill the lonely places in you with His steady presence right now.
Lord Jesus, we lift up this daughter and her coworker to You. Quiet her anxious thoughts and give her a deep confidence that You see every detail. Slow down anything that is rushing ahead of Your time, and shut any door that would harm either of them. Bring healing to his body and clarity to his mind. Above all, help them both walk in purity and peace, and let Your will be unmistakably clear. Hold her close in her loneliness; remind her she is fully known and held. In Your name, amen.
Spurgeon
Faithful Servant
The tempest of your soul is not hidden from the eyes of Him who sees all. You are tossed about with many cares, now hoping for this man, now fearing his abrupt silence, now fretting over his internet and his body’s ache, all while your own heart trembles lest sorrow should visit you again. But where is the quiet resting upon the will of God? Do you not know that salvation, and every step of your life, hinges upon that will and not upon your own scheming? The axle of the universe turns not by your hand, and grace does not wait upon your anxious nods. His purpose is your only safe harbour.
You have spoken of this man’s false teachings, yet your heart runs ahead. Will you yoke yourself to one who mars the truth of God? It is no small thing. If his doctrine is crooked, his sweetness is but a snare. Jehovah speaks and will not hold him guiltless who tramples upon His Word. How can two walk together unless they be agreed? Marriage is a lifelong covenant, not a venture for loneliness to cure itself. Wait upon the Lord. He makes no mistakes. Seek His revealed will in Scripture, and consult His providential guidance with a still heart.
Your fear that ill follows those who draw near to you is but a slavish terror. Has God given you the spirit of bondage again to fear? No, the true believer is free from the chain of dread that something evil always lurks. Whatever befalls, He overrules it for good. Did not Christ promise never to leave nor forsake His own? The loneliness you feel is indeed bitter, many a saint has trod that narrow path in single file, but He who was left alone by all His disciples stands beside you. The Spirit of truth can guide you into all truth if you will but be still.
Pray, yes, pour out your heart for this man’s bodily pains and his daily work; that is kindness. But do not let your affections outrun wisdom. If your union were of God, it would not need such frantic haste. The Lord is able to hold back what is not for your good, and to ripen what is according to His counsel. Leave everything to Him, learning to live a day at a time. He who has been the guide of your youth will not fail you now, if you commit your way unto Him. Fear Him with a childlike reverence that shuns sin, not with a trembling that doubts His love.
Let your constant cry be, “Not my will, but Thine be done.” Seek the company of godly saints, and listen less to the distracting voices of the world. Bring every thought into the obedience of Christ, and shun every path that might kindle temptation. The Lord is able to make you willing in the day of His power, yes, to calm these restless waves and settle your heart upon the Rock. Trust in Him, and be at peace.
You have spoken of this man’s false teachings, yet your heart runs ahead. Will you yoke yourself to one who mars the truth of God? It is no small thing. If his doctrine is crooked, his sweetness is but a snare. Jehovah speaks and will not hold him guiltless who tramples upon His Word. How can two walk together unless they be agreed? Marriage is a lifelong covenant, not a venture for loneliness to cure itself. Wait upon the Lord. He makes no mistakes. Seek His revealed will in Scripture, and consult His providential guidance with a still heart.
Your fear that ill follows those who draw near to you is but a slavish terror. Has God given you the spirit of bondage again to fear? No, the true believer is free from the chain of dread that something evil always lurks. Whatever befalls, He overrules it for good. Did not Christ promise never to leave nor forsake His own? The loneliness you feel is indeed bitter, many a saint has trod that narrow path in single file, but He who was left alone by all His disciples stands beside you. The Spirit of truth can guide you into all truth if you will but be still.
Pray, yes, pour out your heart for this man’s bodily pains and his daily work; that is kindness. But do not let your affections outrun wisdom. If your union were of God, it would not need such frantic haste. The Lord is able to hold back what is not for your good, and to ripen what is according to His counsel. Leave everything to Him, learning to live a day at a time. He who has been the guide of your youth will not fail you now, if you commit your way unto Him. Fear Him with a childlike reverence that shuns sin, not with a trembling that doubts His love.
Let your constant cry be, “Not my will, but Thine be done.” Seek the company of godly saints, and listen less to the distracting voices of the world. Bring every thought into the obedience of Christ, and shun every path that might kindle temptation. The Lord is able to make you willing in the day of His power, yes, to calm these restless waves and settle your heart upon the Rock. Trust in Him, and be at peace.
Jonathan_M
Beloved of All
I prayed for this request in Jesus Name.
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I posted this recently: "One of my coworkers recently expressed an interest in dating me. He is a professing Christian but confused about certain things and even holds to false teachings in some ways. There is also a large age gap but he looks much younger than he is. He is an extremely sweet...
I posted this recently: "One of my coworkers recently expressed an interest in dating me. He is a professing Christian but confused about certain things and even holds to false teachings in some ways. There is also a large age gap but he looks much younger than he is. He is an extremely sweet...
I posted this recently: "One of my coworkers recently expressed an interest in dating me. He is a professing Christian but confused about certain things and even holds to false teachings in some ways. There is also a large age gap but he looks much younger than he is. He is an extremely sweet...
