confusion

[Brother in Christ (JC)]

I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.

The verse above thoroughly explains how I feel.
I wish I didn’t exist, and even though I understand there is a 'reason' for me being here. I wish I wasn’t, though I don’t think I would end my existence I just wish I wasn’t. It makes me feel guilty, because I know life is a "gift" (though, I don’t know how much I believe that life is a gift--often times it seems like a curse and we are just paying for the sins of our forefathers, always striving, always working, even if we are in Christ. Though, yes I get it ).

I should feel happy and grateful that God has protected my life.

Everything hurts. Physically, mentally, emotionally etc

Just pray for me.
I am currently in medical school doing poorly, surrounded by people who are doing well --I feel like this is the last chance to make something of myself and to do something worthwhile at ### years old, I don't know what I would do if I failed...

Even before school started things were hard. My faith has waned in the past four years and it seems my life has gone from ‘frying pan to fire’, its been blow after blow. I try to keep an optimistic outlook and put my trust and hope in God that things will be ok, that they can even be good on this earth in my lifetime... ....but my reality just hurts. I find praying hard talk less of reading the bible.
I can’t retain any information in school, my recall is getting worse I can't remember the words I want to use many times, I am mixing up words.. often times the homonym is what I write down, and it takes me seconds to remember the correct word to put down, it is a struggle to bring myself to do anything. I've prayed against laziness, depression, I try to be positive because I know mindset is 'everything'.

Many times I wish I wasn’t married, I wish I was alone.
I don’t even like myself—I seem not to have any good qualities anymore, things I used to like about myself seem to be less important or good. It is coming to a point that I am afraid to have kids, because I don't want them to be like me. I don't want them to potentially deal with whatever genetic disposition I may have to the problems I having now. (I've have been praying for my kids since I was kid)

I always used to have hope, but let down after let down… stress after stress has really gotten to me over the past four years. It leaves me wondering where did I go wrong, who did I offend?

I am grateful for a roof over my head, food to eat, that all my basic needs are met... I dunno maybe this is as a result of '1st world issues" coming from a background as a 1st generation child of immigrants I recognize my blessings and privilege in that regard.

I don’t know I am just tired. I always been prone to crying, but now it seems like I cry everyday.
I guess pray for me to pass this quarter in school, my marriage, for mental health, physical health, and faith--to find I good church family after being hurt by 'church families' in the past.

Hope deferred makes the heart sick.. I feel like I’ve been sick for awhile I honestly don’t know what to do what to say or not say… what to do
I feel like my prayers fall on deaf ears, for whatever reason so maybe the prayers of others will help me.

Sorry this prayer request is so scatterbrained maybe its more venting.

May God bless you as you pray for me.

You are loved and no one can take that away from you. You are a child of God and He will not abandoned you. Lord I pray for comfort and direction to be instilled upon your child. You said if 2 or more are gathered in my name, that You would be in the midst of them. We stand in agreement for peace and restoration in Jesus' precious name.

I thought that this poem that I wrote some time ago about loneliness may comfort you a bit.
I know of your ways
My precious child.
A little gray
Around the edges
And most certainly wild.

But you will not be forsaken
For you have found the Way.
Now the hands that I have taken
Are yours on this day.

No matter what you have done
No matter where you are,
From the rising of the sun
To the bright evening star.

My grace and compassion
Will pour down from My throne
You will not be abandoned,
You are never alone.
In God's Love.

 

[Kadaenreck]

Remove her confusion and reveal what should be done in the name of Jesus Amen

 

[Kiersa]

I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.
The verse above thoroughly explains how I feel.
I wish I didn’t exist, and even though I understand there is a 'reason' for me being here. I wish I wasn’t, though I don’t think I would end my existence I just wish I wasn’t. It makes me feel guilty, because I know life is a "gift" (though, I don’t know how much I believe that life is a gift--often times it seems like a curse and we are just paying for the sins of our forefathers, always striving, always working, even if we are in Christ. Though, yes I get it).
I should feel happy and grateful that God has protected my life.
Everything hurts. Physically, mentally, emotionally etc.
Just pray for me.
I am currently in medical school doing poorly, surrounded by people who are doing well --I feel like this is the last chance to make something of myself and to do something worthwhile at ### years old, I don't know what I would do if I failed...
Even before school started things were hard. My faith has waned in the past four years and it seems my life has gone from ‘frying pan to fire’, its been blow after blow. I try to keep an optimistic outlook and put my trust and hope in God that things will be ok, that they can even be good on this earth in my lifetime... ....but my reality just hurts. I find praying hard talk less of reading the bible.
I can’t retain any information in school, my recall is getting worse I can't remember the words I want to use many times, I am mixing up words.. often times the homonym is what I write down, and it takes me seconds to remember the correct word to put down, it is a struggle to bring myself to do anything. I've prayed against laziness, depression, I try to be positive because I know mindset is 'everything'.
Many times I wish I wasn’t married, I wish I was alone.
I don’t even like myself—I seem not to have any good qualities anymore, things I used to like about myself seem to be less important or good. It is coming to a point that I am afraid to have kids, because I don't want them to be like me. I don't want them to potentially deal with whatever genetic disposition I may have to the problems I having now. (I've have been praying for my kids since I was kid)
I always used to have hope, but let down after let down… stress after stress has really gotten to me over the past four years. It leaves me wondering where did I go wrong, who did I offend?
I am grateful for a roof over my head, food to eat, that all my basic needs are met... I dunno maybe this is as a result of '1st world issues" coming from a background as a 1st generation child of immigrants I recognize my blessings and privilege in that regard.
I don’t know I am just tired. I always been prone to crying, but now it seems like I cry everyday.
I guess pray for me to pass this quarter in school, my marriage, for mental health, physical health, and faith--to find I good church family after being hurt by 'church families' in the past.
Hope deferred makes the heart sick.. I feel like I’ve been sick for awhile I honestly don’t know what to do what to say or not say… what to do
I feel like my prayers fall on deaf ears, for whatever reason so maybe the prayers of others will help me.
Sorry this prayer request is so scatterbrained maybe its more venting.
May God bless you as you pray for me.

I pray for you in Jesus name Amen

 

[Riuful]

I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.
The verse above thoroughly explains how I feel.
I wish I didn’t exist, and even though I understand there is a 'reason' for me being here. I wish I wasn’t, though I don’t think I would end my existence I just wish I wasn’t. It makes me feel guilty, because I know life is a "gift" (though, I don’t know how much I believe that life is a gift--often times it seems like a curse and we are just paying for the sins of our forefathers, always striving, always working, even if we are in Christ. Though, yes I get it).
I should feel happy and grateful that God has protected my life.
Everything hurts. Physically, mentally, emotionally etc.
Just pray for me.
I am currently in medical school doing poorly, surrounded by people who are doing well --I feel like this is the last chance to make something of myself and to do something worthwhile at ### years old, I don't know what I would do if I failed...
Even before school started things were hard. My faith has waned in the past four years and it seems my life has gone from ‘frying pan to fire’, its been blow after blow. I try to keep an optimistic outlook and put my trust and hope in God that things will be ok, that they can even be good on this earth in my lifetime... ....but my reality just hurts. I find praying hard talk less of reading the bible.
I can’t retain any information in school, my recall is getting worse I can't remember the words I want to use many times, I am mixing up words.. often times the homonym is what I write down, and it takes me seconds to remember the correct word to put down, it is a struggle to bring myself to do anything. I've prayed against laziness, depression, I try to be positive because I know mindset is 'everything'.
Many times I wish I wasn’t married, I wish I was alone.
I don’t even like myself—I seem not to have any good qualities anymore, things I used to like about myself seem to be less important or good. It is coming to a point that I am afraid to have kids, because I don't want them to be like me. I don't want them to potentially deal with whatever genetic disposition I may have to the problems I having now. (I've have been praying for my kids since I was kid)
I always used to have hope, but let down after let down… stress after stress has really gotten to me over the past four years. It leaves me wondering where did I go wrong, who did I offend?
I am grateful for a roof over my head, food to eat, that all my basic needs are met... I dunno maybe this is as a result of '1st world issues" coming from a background as a 1st generation child of immigrants I recognize my blessings and privilege in that regard.
I don’t know I am just tired. I always been prone to crying, but now it seems like I cry everyday.
I guess pray for me to pass this quarter in school, my marriage, for mental health, physical health, and faith--to find I good church family after being hurt by 'church families' in the past.
Hope deferred makes the heart sick.. I feel like I’ve been sick for awhile I honestly don’t know what to do what to say or not say… what to do
I feel like my prayers fall on deaf ears, for whatever reason so maybe the prayers of others will help me.
Sorry this prayer request is so scatterbrained maybe its more venting.
May God bless you as you pray for me.

My dear focus on the positive things that give you hope and you will start to gain strength to overcome try not to dig searching for the source of your problems in life just as you are weak and confused surrender all your burdens to our Lord and be patient because God's ways of solving issues are different from ours it is a journey we learn to walk with him a day at a time. Our Father we pray for our dear one remember him in all his battles we pray this in Jesus name Amen.

 

[Tukarryn]

God will be with you, help you and be there for you. In Jesus name. Amen

 

[tops89]

You are loved and no one can take that away from you. You are a child of God and He will not abandon you. Lord I pray for comfort and direction to be instilled upon your child. You said if 2 or more are gathered in my name, that You would be in the midst of them. We stand in agreement for peace and restoration in Jesus' precious name.

I thought that this poem that I wrote some time ago about loneliness may comfort you a bit.
I know of your ways
My precious child.
A little gray
Around the edges
And most certainly wild.

But you will not be forsaken
For you have found the Way.
Now the hands that I have taken
Are yours on this day.

No matter what you have done
No matter where you are,
From the rising of the sun
To the bright evening star.

My grace and compassion
Will pour down from My throne
You will not be abandoned,
You are never alone.
In God's Love.

Amen beautiful poem

 

[tops89]

Remove her confusion and reveal what should be done in the name of Jesus Amen

Amen

 

[tops89]

I pray for you in Jesus name Amen

Amen. thank you.

 

[tops89]

My dear focuss on the positive things that give you hope and you will start to gain strength to overcome. Try not to dig searching for the source of your problems in life; just as you are weak and confused, surrender all your burdens to our Lord and be patient because God's ways of solving issues are different from ours. It is a journey we learn to walk with Him a day at a time. Our Father, we pray for our dear one, remember him in all his battles. We pray this in Jesus' name. Amen

Amen I will try to do that, though it's hard.

 

[tops89]

Dear ###, Dr. Heal thyself. It appears that you are what we call depressed and may be in need of sunshine. May I suggest antdepressants, or St. John's Wort? Vitamin D, and lots of sunshine and walking?

I will pray for you, but you need to sleep, eat, and take care of yourself before your memory will work.

Father, please see ###, and help them see what they must do to serve you and feel better in this tent that we live in. Fix ### Father, so that they can help many come to you. This I pray in Yeshuah's mighty name. Amen

Amen!
Funny you mention St John's Wort and Vit D as I am currently in a more naturopathic holistic medical school and have worked with botanicals, diets, & supplements in the past. I need to make sure to take care of myself you're right.

Amen amen. I appreciate that I will try to take your advice.