What to do?

Anonymous

Beloved of All
Lord, I ask for authority and respect from my company and colleagues. Despite me forgiving them, being nice and seeing the same ppl to disrepect me but being nice to others on a continual cycle which i don't know what to do anymore and it is make work difficult when i need help from them. Is it time for me quit?
 
We hear the heaviness in your heart and we join with you in bringing this workplace burden before the Lord. It is painful to show forgiveness and kindness and yet continually feel disrespected while seeing those same colleagues treat others well, and even more difficult when that disrespect makes it hard to get the help you need to do your work well. We commend you for choosing forgiveness, for that reflects the heart of Christ, and we understand why you are asking whether it is time to leave.

We want to remind you that our work is ultimately unto the Lord. Colossians 3:23 says Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord, and not for men. When our ways please Him, He is able to give favor even in difficult places. Proverbs 16:7 says When a man's ways please Yahweh, he makes even his enemies to be at peace with him. Authority and respect that are lasting do not come from demanding them from people but from God who establishes and lifts up. At the same time, Scripture calls us to pursue peace as far as it depends on us. Romans 12:18 says If it is possible, as much as it is up to you, be at peace with all men. And Proverbs 15:1 says A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. Continuing to respond with gentleness, professionalism, and excellence, while also speaking truth calmly about what you need to do your job, honors God.

Forgiveness does not mean we ignore ongoing patterns or never set wise boundaries. Matthew 5:44 says But I tell you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who mistreat you and persecute you, and we see you have been trying to live this out. Loving them and praying for them can go together with humbly and clearly communicating your needs, documenting when you are hindered from doing your work, and seeking godly counsel and, if needed, speaking with a supervisor or another trusted authority in the company. This is not complaining but seeking to work in an orderly and respectful way.

Regarding whether to quit, we encourage you not to make that decision hastily out of hurt alone, but to seek the Lord's wisdom and timing. James 1:5 says But if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him. We encourage you to ask God for clear direction, to seek counsel from mature believers who know your situation, to consider your responsibilities and provision, and to pray for open doors if He is leading you elsewhere and for grace to remain if He is calling you to stay and be a light there for a season. The Lord may use this trial to refine your character and to show His strength in you, or He may be preparing a better place for you to serve Him.

We also noticed your prayer addressed the Lord but did not mention the name of Jesus, and we want to gently remind you that it is only through Jesus that we have access to the Father. John 14:6 says Jesus said to him, I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me. And Acts 4:12 says There is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven that is given among men, by which we must be saved. It is because of what Jesus did on the cross and His resurrection that we can come boldly to God, be forgiven, and be heard. We pray in His name with confidence.

We pray together for you now. Father, we lift up our brother or sister before You in the name of Jesus Christ. You see every instance of disrespect and every act of forgiveness offered. We ask You to grant favor and godly respect in that workplace, to soften the hearts of colleagues, and to give wisdom to speak and act in a way that pleases You. Grant clarity about whether to stay or to go, provide wise counsel, and open or close doors according to Your perfect will. Strengthen this dear one to work heartily for You, to guard their heart from bitterness, and to find their identity and worth in Christ alone. Provide for every need and let Your peace rule in their heart as they trust You. We ask all this in the mighty name of Jesus, amen.

We encourage you to keep praying daily for your colleagues by name, to continue in faithful, excellent work, to seek a conversation with a supervisor about practical needs for collaboration, and to wait on the Lord's timing before quitting. He is with you in this difficult cycle and He will guide you step by step as you seek Him.
 
We hear how tiring this cycle has been for you, trying to forgive and be kind, and still feeling singled out for disrespect while others are treated differently. When you need help to do your work and it is withheld, it makes every day harder, and it makes sense you are asking whether staying is sustainable.

Being gracious is not the same as having no boundaries. Respect in a workplace grows not just from being nice, but from clear, calm expectations about how work gets done together. It can help to step back for a short time before making a big decision about quitting.

One steady next step we would encourage is to get perspective outside the daily pressure. In the next week, jot down just the facts when cooperation breaks down, what you needed, who you asked, what happened, and then take those notes to one wise person you trust, whether a supervisor, mentor, or counselor outside the company, to help you sort what is a pattern that might be addressed and what may be a sign it is time to look elsewhere. That outside view can keep you from carrying the decision alone.

We are carrying this with you in prayer.

Father, we lift our friend to You in Jesus' name. You see the effort they have made and the discouragement they feel. Give them wisdom for each conversation, favor where help is needed, and clear guidance about whether to stay or to step away. Guard their heart with Your peace and lead them to the right next place. Amen.
 
Your words carry the weight of a tried and weary heart, and I have heard your cry before the Lord concerning the want of respect and the continual disrespect you meet with at your work, though you have sought to forgive and to be kind.

Let me first speak to you of that forgiveness which you have shown. It is a noble thing, and greatly to be commended, for we are taught to forgive even as Christ forgave us. The pattern set before us is not a forgiveness that waits till the offender is worthy, but a divine forgiveness, a complete forgiveness, a continuous forgiveness. He forgave us at the first all our sins, and He continues daily to forgive, and His forgiveness is eternal. When we have tasted such mercy, for us to forgive ought to be as natural as to open our hands. It is a joint stock business of mutual forgiveness, and members of the household of faith should take large shares in it. Remember that revenge is paltry, but forgiveness is great minded and gloriously ennobling. You have done well to forgive, and you must not repent of it though men do not return kindness for kindness. Yet know this, that the forgiveness which is with God is the root of all. There is forgiveness with Him, and that is a matter of certainty, without limit, and it is to be obtained through Jesus Christ His Son alone. See that your own soul is living in the power of that forgiveness, for then you will have strength to forgive others still.

But to forgive does not mean that you must invite further injury without wisdom, nor does being kind mean you must be without boundaries. Our Lord forgives perfectly, yet He does not call evil good. You may with meekness and with grace speak the truth, and seek what is right. If you need help from colleagues to do your work faithfully, it is lawful and right to seek it in a proper way. Go quietly and humbly to those who are set over you, not with complaint or bitterness, but with a plain statement of what hinders your labour, and ask for counsel. Seek also a faithful brother or pastor who knows you and can give you wise counsel face to face, for we see through a glass darkly when our own hearts are sore.

You ask if it is time to quit. Be not hasty in this matter. Remember Job, of whom it is written, In all this Job sinned not, nor charged God foolishly. He kept right with God under great trial and temptation, though he lost much and was sorely tried by the words and dealings of others. He did not sin by despair, saying I shall never look up again, nor by unbelieving speeches. God was able to uphold Job in all this, and you may be sure He can support you. Do not let a hasty resolve be made in the heat of discouragement. We do not serve God for wages, but we still have respect unto the recompense of the reward, and we desire to do our work faithfully where He has placed us.

Therefore I would counsel you thus. First, wait upon the Lord in prayer, not only for authority and respect from men, but for wisdom, for patience, and for favour to do your work as unto the Lord. True authority is not demanded, it is given by God and confirmed by faithful, humble, and diligent service. Second, examine your own ways before the Lord, and ask Him to show you if there be any thing in your manner or work that may be amended, and be willing to be taught. Third, continue in that ennobling grace of forgiveness, yet do not suffer in silence if there is a right and orderly way to seek help. Speak with gentleness and truth. Fourth, consider your provision and your responsibilities, and do not leave your post without clear guidance and an open door from the Lord, lest you exchange one trial for a greater one. If after prayer, counsel, and patient trying of every proper means, the place remains destructive to your soul or your ability to provide, then the Lord may indeed call you elsewhere, and He will make the way plain.

I will pray for you, that the Lord who upholds the tried and who has forgiveness without limit would grant you a quiet spirit, daily strength to forgive as you have been forgiven, wisdom to know how to act, and grace to keep from sinning under provocation. May He give you favour where it is needed for your work, and may He teach you to find your first respect not in the esteem of men, but in being accepted in the Beloved, and to labour faithfully until He Himself shall say, well done.
 
May God in Jesus' name answer your prayer request according to God's perfect love, wisdom, will, timing, grace, and mercy. God is so in love with you. Be Encouraged!

Psalm 37:4: Delight yourself in the Lord, And He shall give you the desires of your heart.
Matthew 6:33: But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.

🙏Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. Thank You for loving me, Jesus. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. God bless me to prosper, walk in excellent health, and never stop growing in the love, grace, wisdom, and knowledge of Christ Jesus. God bless me to know You in truth, fall in love with You with all my heart, mind, soul, body, and strength and never fall out of love with You. God, bless me to have an ever growing closer stronger, more intimate relationship with You. Bless me with the love, desire, strength, and the spirit of obedience to always delight myself in You, seek first Your kingdom, Your righteousness, and to always respect and obey You. Bless me to know You, the way You want me to know You. So that I will trust You with my life and anyway that You move in my life. Bless me to trust You with all my heart, lean not to my own understanding, acknowledge You in all my ways, and allow You to direct my footsteps and actions. Bless me with knowledge, wisdom, and understanding in all You have called me to do.

God heal me in every area of my life. Deliver and cleanse me of everything in my life that doesn't honor You. Transform and renew my mind. Bless me with love, power, and a sound mind. Let the mind that is in Christ Jesus be in me. Bless me to have and operate with a God-conscious-solution-focused-heart-mind-spirit-and-attitude. Bless me to have a God Kingdom Culture Mentality. God be with me as a mighty warrior. Let no weapon formed against me prosper. Protect me from all the plans of my enemies and the plans of the enemy of my soul. God, all that I have asked of You, in this prayer, please do the same for the writer of the prayer, all those who love and care about me, and all those I love and care about. God, please forever honor this prayer over each of our lives. God Thank You. Amen, so be it by faith, and by faith, it is so. Prayer written by The Encourager-Prayer Warrior-Board Certified Professional Christian Life Coach. www.theencourager.net

Heal Me Lord Jesus Spirit, Soul, And Body
 
Your weariness in this cycle is heard, and it is painful to keep forgiving and showing kindness while still receiving disrespect, especially when you depend on these same colleagues to do your work well.

Scripture teaches that forgiveness is not only a duty we offer to others but a gift God first gives to us and trains in us. To be taught to have a gentle and human soul, to not repay disrespect with disrespect, is itself grace. The blessing the Psalms speak of is for those whose sins are forgiven and covered, and when we have received that great mercy we are then able to extend mercy to others. That does not mean the hurt is small, but it does mean you can bring both your own failings and the wrongs done against you honestly before God, naming them plainly, so you can know more deeply how much you have been forgiven and how much strength He can give you to walk in gentleness.

You asked God for authority and respect. True authority in the Christian understanding is not seized or demanded, it is received from above and exercised under God. The apostles could act with authority only because they had received it from Christ, and even the centurion who understood power knew that his own ability to command came from being himself under authority. In the workplace this means respect is not created simply by being nicer or by trying harder to please people who treat you unevenly. It grows as you remain under Christ's authority, doing your work faithfully as for the Lord rather than for people, speaking truthfully, keeping your word, and serving others without partiality. People often notice consistency, humility and competence over time more than they respond to immediate kindness alone.

It is right to examine your own heart before God, to ask Him to show you any place where you may need to grow, and to thank Him for His forgiveness. It is also right to seek wisdom for how to work with difficult colleagues. Continual forgiveness does not require you to pretend the pattern is not happening or to never address it. Consider these steps prayerfully:

Pray for your colleagues by name, that God would work in their hearts and in yours, and that you would be kept from bitterness.

Seek counsel from a mature believer or pastor who knows you, and if possible from a wise and trusted person at work who can give you perspective on what is happening.

When you need help to do your job, make requests clearly, calmly and in writing when appropriate, so expectations are clear and you have a record of what you have asked.

Set respectful boundaries. You can be kind without accepting mockery or dismissive language. A quiet, steady response such as, I want to work well with you, please speak to me respectfully so we can get this done, can be both gentle and firm.

Continue to do your work with excellence, remembering that your ultimate service is to Christ. That steadiness often commends you more than any attempt to force respect.

About quitting, do not decide in the height of discouragement alone. Scripture does not call you to remain where you are being harmed without seeking help, but it does call you to act with wisdom and provision in mind. Ask whether the disrespect is something that can be addressed through a conversation with a supervisor or human resources, whether there are other roles within the company, and whether God may be opening another opportunity. Pray, seek counsel, count the cost for your household, and look for open doors rather than simply escaping a hard place. If you do leave, let it be a clear step led by God, not only a reaction to hurt.

I will pray for you now.

Father, you see this weariness and the repeated sting of being treated as less than others. You know the desire to be respected and to have the help needed to do good work. Grant this one a deeper sense of your forgiveness and covering, and form a gentle and steady heart that does not return evil for evil. Give wisdom to know how to speak and act with grace and truth, and give favor where you will. Provide wise counselors and, if needed, a way forward whether to stay and be a light in this workplace or to move to another place where gifts can be used well. Sustain daily bread and daily strength, and let all be done for your glory through Jesus Christ. Amen.
 

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