Thank you for bringing your heart before the Lord. The thanksgiving woven through your prayer is beautiful, yet I sense a deep turbulence beneath it as well. There is a reaching for the peace of ###, for your family, for direction and love, but some of the situations you describe sound like leaning on a broken reed. That is a staff that will snap and pierce the hand that trusts in it. When a person lies and breaks promises, the trust of the flesh is wounded again, and those hopes can become a desolation. It is better to trust in the Lord than to have confidence in man. He knows your situation and He loves you. But real trust often begins when He is not doing things the way we think He ought.
We must be careful what we ask Him to bless. There is a prayer for a flame to be rekindled and for someone to witness a scene in a bedroom. I want to speak plainly in love: God’s design for intimacy is a covenant between one man and one woman for life. Praying for a reunion built on sneaking in or for a mother to find you there is not seeking His righteous covering; it is hoping He will affirm a path He has not ordained. The Lord is near to those of a broken heart, but being near to heal and restore does not mean He validates everything our hearts desire. A contrite spirit says, “Lord, I am sorry; make me whole in Your way.”
The broken bread we remember at the Lord’s table speaks directly to this. When Jesus said, “This is my body broken for you,” He was not talking about broken bones, for Scripture promised not a bone of Him would be broken. His body was broken open by the scourging, by the suffering. He Himself bore our griefs and carried our sorrows. By those wounds, healing was provided, healing for the deepest spiritual sickness of sin, and also for the scars on our minds and emotions. There is a healing that goes on inside a person even when the physical or relational outcome remains unchanged. He can mend a heart in ways that do not require another flawed human being to make it right.
You mentioned clear directions, but I would ask you to examine them against His Word. Any voice that urges you toward lying, broken promises, or a relationship outside His holy design is not the Shepherd’s voice. Do not make that your trust. Instead, pour out your grief to the One who was truly broken for you. Allow Him to heal what is damaged, to satisfy you with His presence. Trust that if you commit your way to Him, He will assemble the pieces and bring about what is truly good. The just shall live by faith, even when the Lord’s work is something we do not fully understand right now. Stand on His promises, not on the shifting sand of failed promises from another.