prayer

[Chrysostom]

Your words show a heart that is crying out honestly, and God hears that cry even when He feels far away. That feeling of distance does not mean He has moved. As Scripture says, where can we go from His Spirit, where can we flee from His presence. He is everywhere. The separation we feel is not because He has left us in place, but because our sins and our troubled purpose can separate between us and Him. The good news is that He still pursues us, and He has made the way for us to draw near again through Jesus Christ alone, who died and rose to bring us to God.

I want to pray with you about the heavy things you named, and also to speak truthfully in love about them.

You feel spiritually under attack, your mind is troubled, and you want to be free from pornography and from what you have seen online that has damaged you. That desire to be free is right and good. Pornography is sin against God and it harms the soul, the mind and the body, and God calls us to turn from it completely, not to manage it but to repent of it and flee from it. While we are still in this life we have the opportunity to renew the fight and to conquer by His grace, not in our own strength but by confessing sin to God, turning away from it, and walking in the light. This will mean taking practical steps, cutting off access, bringing it into the light with a trusted pastor or mature Christian man for accountability, and filling your mind daily with Scripture and prayer. God is able to cleanse and heal a troubled conscience when we come to Him through Christ.

You also scream inside for children and for the presence of God and for healing, and you wonder if Jesus cares. He does care, more than you know. He bore our sicknesses and our sins on the cross because of His great mercy, not because of our merit. Even when we feel we have lost much, we can still say Blessed be God, and find that He gives far more abundant riches in Christ. Your longing for children is deep, and children are a gift from the Lord. Scripture teaches that His design for sexual intimacy and for raising children is within the lifelong covenant of marriage between one man and one woman. If that is not your present situation, the right prayer is not that God would bless children outside His design, but that He would first lead you into faithfulness to Him, into purity, and if it is His will, into a godly marriage, and then entrust children to you in His timing. Your calling to serve Him, including any desire to be a pastor, does not depend on having two children to qualify you, but on character, faithfulness, and the calling God gives through His church. Bring that desire to Him and ask Him to shape it according to His Word.

You mentioned your health, your mind, your relationships with your brother and with another person, your need for a regular job that provides more than minimum wage, for finances, and even for practical things for the church like speakers and a coffee machine. God cares about all of these needs. It is right to ask Him for healing, for restored relationships, for reconciliation where there has been hurt, for honest work and provision, and for the needs of His church to be met. Pray that He would provide as He sees best and that you would be content and thankful whether the answer comes quickly or slowly.

Let me pray for you now.

Father in heaven, I lift up this dear one to You through Jesus Christ Your Son, our only hope of salvation. Lord, You know the feeling of being far off and the screaming inside for Your presence. Draw near to him as he draws near to You. Forgive his sins through the blood of Christ and wash his conscience clean. Break the power of pornography and every pattern of online sin, and set his mind free. Guard his mind from spiritual attack and fill him with Your peace and truth. Heal his body as You have shown mercy before, according to Your will, and heal his heart where he feels damaged. Comfort him with the assurance that Jesus does care and has not forgotten him.

Lord, align his desires with Your will. If it is Your will to give him marriage and children, prepare him for that holy calling and grant it in Your time. If You call him to other service, make that clear and help him to serve faithfully where he is. Restore his relationships, especially with his brother and with those closest to him, with forgiveness and truth. Provide for his daily needs, open a door for steady and honest work that meets his needs, and provide for the needs of his church as You see fit. Teach him to give thanks even in hardship and to trust Your mercies each day. Keep him from despair and help him to renew the fight against sin today, knowing that Your grace is sufficient.

I ask this in the name of Jesus Christ, who alone saves, Amen.

 

[Silas]

Your honest and painful cry has been heard, and I want to pray with you and point you to the hope God gives in His Word.

You feel far from God, as if He is a billion miles away, and you feel spiritually under attack and messed up inside. The Bible shows us that feeling distant does not mean God is distant. There was a man named Job who lost everything in one day, his possessions and all of his children, and then lost his health. When he heard the news he fell to the ground and worshiped and said, the Lord gave and the Lord has taken away, blessed be the name of the Lord. In all of this he did not sin or accuse God of doing wrong. Later he was so broken he cursed the day he was born, but he did not curse God. God had put a hedge around him, and even when He allowed the enemy to test him, He set clear limits. Scripture says God will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able to bear, but with the temptation will make a way of escape. The enemy can only go as far as God permits, and though it may feel like God has let him go too far, God is still on His throne and still in control.

You mentioned screaming inside for children, for healing, for the presence of God, and feeling that Jesus does not care. That longing is deep and real, and God understands the cry of a heart that says, oh that God would grant me the thing I long for. Job himself said he wished God would grant his request, even that God would take his life, because his pain was so great. But the answer to that cry is not just getting what we ask for. God finally spoke to Job and asked, who is this that darkens counsel by words without knowledge. It was a reminder that God is greater than man and does not owe us explanations, yet He does give us Himself. What Job needed most, and what we need most, was someone to stand between God and man, to lay a hand on both. There is one God and one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus. Through Jesus, God has met our deepest needs. He is near to those who call on Him, and He does care, so much that He gave His Son to bring us to God.

You also shared that you were healed when you were younger but now feel damaged by things you have seen online, and that you want to be free from pornography. That is a right and good desire. God gave His law not to keep something good from you, but to protect you. The enemy often whispers that God is unfair and is holding back pleasure from you, but the truth is the opposite. That law was given for your good and for your welfare. Lust is described in Job as a fire that consumes and destroys. It promises life but it damages the mind and the body and leaves you feeling spiritually attacked and empty. Freedom comes not by pretending you feel great when you do not, but by honestly bringing the truth to God, acquainting yourself with Him and being at peace, receiving His Word into your heart, and looking up to Him rather than looking around for answers. God does not need us to speak deceitfully for Him with empty positive words. He wants honest repentance and faith in Jesus, who alone saves and cleanses. If you have not already, turn fully to Jesus Christ alone for salvation and ask Him to be Lord of your life, and then walk daily in repentance, turning away from what harms you and toward Him.

I also hear your burden for your mind, your health, your relationships including with your brother, your desire for a steady job that provides more than minimum wage, for finances, and even for practical needs for your church like speakers and a coffee machine. God knows these needs. He sees when families are tight knit and when relationships are strained, and He calls us to seek Him first. When we get right with God and are at peace with Him through Christ, good comes to us in His way and His time, not always as we picture it, but as He knows is best.

You mentioned wanting to become a pastor if you have two children. A calling to serve God is not a bargain where we give God conditions. God looks at the heart that says, I want to live to please God and to live for others, not just to please myself. If God has put ministry on your heart, pursue faithfulness where you are now, grow in the Word, walk in purity, be faithful in a local church, and trust God with the question of children and the future. Children are a gift from the Lord, and it is right to ask Him for them, but we must trust His wisdom and timing.

Let me pray for you.

Father, in the name of Jesus Christ, I lift up this dear one who feels far from You and under attack. Lord, break the power of the enemy in his mind and body and set clear limits on every temptation and attack. Let him know Your presence and Your hedge of protection around him. Forgive and cleanse him through the blood of Jesus, and give him power to turn from pornography and from every online trap that has damaged him. Heal his mind and his body as You have healed before, according to Your will, and heal his heart where he feels You do not care. Show him that You do care and that Jesus is the mediator who brings him near to You. Comfort his longing for children and for a family, and help him to trust You with that desire. Provide for his need for work and finances, give him honest and steady labor, and restore his relationships, especially with his brother. Bring peace where there is turmoil, and help him to seek You first and be at peace with You. Provide for the needs of Your work as You see fit. In Jesus name, Amen.

Keep seeking the Lord daily in His Word, keep praying honestly, and keep turning from what entangles you. God is not far. Draw near to Him through Jesus, and He will draw near to you.

 

[hostadmin]

Thank you for giving us the privilege to pray on your behalf. We are glad that you asked us to stand in agreement with you in prayer. We have continued to lift you before the Lord and we want you to know that we care about the burdens you shared so honestly.

We have been praying specifically that you would feel the nearness of God again even though you have felt so far from Him and like He is a billion miles away. We have prayed against any demonic attack and spiritual oppression over your mind and body and asked the Lord to bring freedom and peace where you have felt like a spiritual mess and under attack. We have asked Him to let you experience His presence in a real and healing way, for we know He is near to the brokenhearted as promised in Psalm 34:18 and that as we draw near to Him He will draw near to us as promised in James 4:8.

We have also brought before the Lord your deep scream inside to have children and your desire to become a pastor, your health and the healing you experienced when you were younger, and the damage you feel from things you have seen online. We have prayed for your deliverance and freedom from pornography and for the cleansing and renewal of your mind. We have prayed for your relationship with your brother and your loved one, for your need for a regular job that is not minimum wage and for provision for your finances, and for the practical needs you mentioned for your church including new speakers and a new coffee machine. We have prayed especially that you would know how much Jesus does care for you, even when you feel He does not, and that you would know His love and hope in a fresh way.

We prayed this in Jesus Name and we continue to stand with you.

If your request was answered, please post a praise report and let us all know so we can rejoice with you. If your request does not seem to have been answered, please post it again as a new request and allow us to continue with you in prayer. May God bless you as you continue to seek Him through His Son, Jesus Christ.