We hear the burden in your heart and we thank you for bringing this before the Lord and for faithfully praying at least twice a day for this young man. We commend your desire to see him come to know Jesus and your compassion for his struggle, and we join with you in prayer for both of you.
We believe God loves your friend deeply and desires that he be saved, for God desires all people to be saved and come to full knowledge of the truth as written in 1 Timothy 2:4, and the Lord is not wishing that any should perish but that all should come to repentance as written in 2 Peter 3:9. We rejoice that he is open to learning about Christianity, and we pray you will continue to share the gospel with clarity and love. Jesus said I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me in John 14:6, and there is salvation in none other, for neither is there any other name under heaven, that is given among men, by which we must be saved in Acts 4:12. It is only through faith in Jesus Christ, believing that God raised Him from the dead and confessing Him as Lord as written in Romans 10:9, that your friend can be forgiven and made new. If he receives Christ he will become a new creation as written in 2 Corinthians 5:17, and Christ can set him free indeed as written in John 8:36.
We also must speak lovingly and honestly about what you have shared concerning his addiction and your relationship with him. Pornography is not a small struggle, it is sexual immorality of the heart. Jesus taught that everyone who gazes at a woman to lust after her has committed adultery with her already in his heart in Matthew 5:28, and we are commanded to flee sexual immorality in 1 Corinthians 6:18. Every other sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body. That addiction brings unhappiness because it enslaves the soul and grieves the Holy Spirit, but God is faithful and will with the temptation also make the way of escape that he may be able to endure it as written in 1 Corinthians 10:13. We pray for his complete deliverance, repentance and purity, and that he would seek accountability and turn from that sin fully as he seeks Jesus.
We also want to guard your heart with the wisdom of Scripture. You describe him as the sweetest guy and you feel Jesus wanted you to meet this man to help him, and we understand how deeply you feel for him even though you have not met in person. Yet we must gently rebuke and caution you about pursuing a romantic relationship with a man who is not a believer in Jesus Christ. Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers, for what fellowship has righteousness and iniquity, or what fellowship has light with darkness in 2 Corinthians 6:14. We believe in the sanctity of marriage as a lifelong commitment between a man and a woman, and we strongly endorse marriage that honors God. Being a boyfriend or girlfriend should be considered courtship with the goal being marriage to another Christian believer, not simply a partnership or dating relationship outside of that purpose. Sex before or outside marriage is fornication and is sin before God. While you have not mentioned sexual sin between you, an online emotional attachment to an unbelieving man can quickly lead your heart away from God's best and leave you stressed, crying late at night and deeply hurt, as you have described. Keep your heart with all diligence, for out of it is the wellspring of life in Proverbs 4:23. It is good to share Christ with him as a brother in need of the gospel, but we encourage you not to pursue a courtship toward marriage unless and until he has genuinely repented, believed in Jesus, and shows the fruit of a transformed life over time, confirmed by mature believers and pastoral counsel. We pray instead that God would bring you a godly Christian husband in His timing if it is His will for you to marry, and that you would seek wisdom as you are still learning and growing, for if any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of God who gives to all liberally in James 1:5.
We also see your pain and sleepless tears and we want to remind you that Yahweh is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit in Psalm 34:18, and that you can cast your cares on Him because He cares for you. In nothing be anxious, but in everything, by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your thoughts in Christ Jesus in Philippians 4:6-7.
We pray together now for you both.
Father in heaven, we come before You in the name of Jesus Christ, for there is no other name by which we can approach Your throne. We thank You for this sister in Christ who has a tender heart for the lost and we ask You to comfort her tonight as she weeps. Wipe her tears, give her Your peace that surpasses understanding, guard her heart and mind, and give her wisdom, discernment and godly counsel as she continues to learn and grow in You. Help her to trust You with this friendship, to maintain holy boundaries, to not be unequally yoked, and to seek first Your kingdom. Lord, we lift up her Muslim friend to You. You know his name and his struggles. We ask that You would open his eyes to see Jesus as the way, the truth and the life, convict him of sin, draw him to repentance and faith, and save him by Your grace. Deliver him from the bondage of pornography and lust, cleanse him, make him new, and set him free to walk in purity. Surround them both with mature believers who can disciple and encourage them, and let Your will be done in both of their lives for Your glory. We ask all this in the mighty name of Jesus, amen.
