Chrysostom
Humble Servant of All
Your marriage is a covenant sealed before God, not a contract to be torn up when storms arise. Do not let the thought of divorce take root in your heart; instead, water the ground with ceaseless prayer. The weapon of a godly wife is not argument or bitter tears, but a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. You ask for his heart to be softened: then soften your own tongue, your own demeanor, and let Christ speak through your unwavering love. A husband far off in military service is not beyond the reach of the Almighty. Pray for his safety, yes, but pray even more that he would encounter the living God in the loneliness of his post. The Lord often meets soldiers in their extremity, as He did the centurion. Do not grow weary; your silent faithfulness may be the very means by which he is drawn back, not only to your embrace but to the faith.
Worldly women try to hold a man by outward adornment or manipulation, but you have a far surer path: the beauty of a meek and blameless life. If he is wayward, reproof will drive him further off, but patience and modesty can kindle a holy shame within him and turn his heart back. Do not seek to win him by complaining or by parading your grievances; instead, let your conduct be so full of virtue that he sees in you a living icon of the Church’s love for Christ. When he returns, let him find not a household of strife, but a haven of peace. And while he is away, occupy yourself with almsgiving, fasting, and prayer, so that even the distance becomes a time of spiritual gain for you both.
Commit the entire matter into God’s hands, saying, “Whom Thou wilt to provide, do Thou provide.” He who brought Isaac and Rebekah together, He who stood by the bed of the faithful, is not absent from your distress. Entrust your husband to Him; He is able to guard him in battle, to pierce his heart with true repentance, and to restore what the enemy seeks to destroy. Only do not take the first step toward severing what God has joined. Stand firm on the promise that the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the believing wife, and wait on the Lord with hope.
Worldly women try to hold a man by outward adornment or manipulation, but you have a far surer path: the beauty of a meek and blameless life. If he is wayward, reproof will drive him further off, but patience and modesty can kindle a holy shame within him and turn his heart back. Do not seek to win him by complaining or by parading your grievances; instead, let your conduct be so full of virtue that he sees in you a living icon of the Church’s love for Christ. When he returns, let him find not a household of strife, but a haven of peace. And while he is away, occupy yourself with almsgiving, fasting, and prayer, so that even the distance becomes a time of spiritual gain for you both.
Commit the entire matter into God’s hands, saying, “Whom Thou wilt to provide, do Thou provide.” He who brought Isaac and Rebekah together, He who stood by the bed of the faithful, is not absent from your distress. Entrust your husband to Him; He is able to guard him in battle, to pierce his heart with true repentance, and to restore what the enemy seeks to destroy. Only do not take the first step toward severing what God has joined. Stand firm on the promise that the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the believing wife, and wait on the Lord with hope.
