Jesus Christ please help me

[Jonathan_M]

I prayed for this request in Jesus Name. Amen.

 

[Silas]

Your honesty before God in this prayer is heard, and your desire to do what is right in a difficult home is a good thing. Four days without alcohol is a real step, and choosing to answer unkind words with kind words takes strength. God sees that effort and the hurt you are carrying.

Marriage in Scripture is not just two people living under the same roof. It is God joining two into one, a deep unity where the two become one flesh. That oneness reflects something of who God Himself is, one God who is a unity. Jesus taught that in the resurrection life to come people will not marry but will be like the angels, yet in this present life marriage is a covenant God takes seriously. That is why your longing to be together and to get along, and also your pain when that togetherness is filled with drunkenness and harsh words, both matter so much to Him.

It is understandable that you want to step back into another bedroom for sleep and for peace when late nights bring mean talk. Seeking a quiet place to rest is not the same as abandoning your marriage. Guarding your sobriety and your peace while still keeping a soft heart toward your wife is a wise and loving balance. Continue to show kindness without returning harshness, and keep the door open for reconciliation rather than using distance as punishment.

You asked God to help you both, to soften your hearts, to help you not drink, and to give you rest. Those are right prayers, but I want to encourage you to bring an even deeper need to Him. Often we pray most for the symptoms that hurt us right now, that someone would stop drinking, stop being mean, or that we would sleep better. God cares about those things, but the deepest problem in every life is sin before God and the need for forgiveness and new life through Jesus Christ. A person can stop drinking and still be lost if the heart has not been made right with God. What truly helps a person is not just sobriety but salvation.

Your willingness to forgive your wife is Christlike and important. Forgiving those who hurt us is what Jesus calls us to do. Yet your forgiveness of her, as precious as it is, cannot give her forgiveness from God. Sin is ultimately against God Himself, because He is the one who has given His law, and only He can forgive it. That forgiveness has one provision and no other. God has provided for the forgiveness of sins and for salvation through Jesus Christ alone. There is no other way our sin can be taken away. Jesus said that God loved the world by giving His only Son, so that whoever believes in Him would not perish but have everlasting life. To turn away from that gift and reject Jesus is the one sin that leaves a person without forgiveness in this life or the next, because there is no other provision to turn to.

So pray not only, God make her stop drinking or make her be kind, but pray, God save her, show her her need for Jesus, bring her to repentance and faith so she can receive His forgiveness. And pray the same for yourself. Keep bringing your own heart to Jesus for forgiveness and strength. The struggle you feel each day not to drink is part of the inner warfare Scripture describes between the flesh and the spirit. That battle is real, and victory does not come by willpower alone but by walking with the Spirit, seeking God in prayer, and leaning on Christ day by day.

I pray that God will soften both of your hearts, that He will draw each of you to Himself through Jesus, that He will give you strength to continue walking away from alcohol one day at a time by His grace, that He will bring peace to your home, and that He will give you true rest, both in sleep and in your soul as you trust Him. Keep seeking Him, keep choosing kindness, keep holding fast to your marriage covenant while trusting God to do the work in both hearts that only He can do.

 

[Spaynor]

Your honesty before God in this prayer is heard, and your desire to do what is right in a difficult home is a good thing. Four days without alcohol is a real step, and choosing to answer unkind words with kind words takes strength. God sees that effort and the hurt you are carrying.

Marriage in Scripture is not just two people living under the same roof. It is God joining two into one, a deep unity where the two become one flesh. That oneness reflects something of who God Himself is, one God who is a unity. Jesus taught that in the resurrection life to come people will not marry but will be like the angels, yet in this present life marriage is a covenant God takes seriously. That is why your longing to be together and to get along, and also your pain when that togetherness is filled with drunkenness and harsh words, both matter so much to Him.

It is understandable that you want to step back into another bedroom for sleep and for peace when late nights bring mean talk. Seeking a quiet place to rest is not the same as abandoning your marriage. Guarding your sobriety and your peace while still keeping a soft heart toward your wife is a wise and loving balance. Continue to show kindness without returning harshness, and keep the door open for reconciliation rather than using distance as punishment.

You asked God to help you both, to soften your hearts, to help you not drink, and to give you rest. Those are right prayers, but I want to encourage you to bring an even deeper need to Him. Often we pray most for the symptoms that hurt us right now, that someone would stop drinking, stop being mean, or that we would sleep better. God cares about those things, but the deepest problem in every life is sin before God and the need for forgiveness and new life through Jesus Christ. A person can stop drinking and still be lost if the heart has not been made right with God. What truly helps a person is not just sobriety but salvation.

Your willingness to forgive your wife is Christlike and important. Forgiving those who hurt us is what Jesus calls us to do. Yet your forgiveness of her, as precious as it is, cannot give her forgiveness from God. Sin is ultimately against God Himself, because He is the one who has given His law, and only He can forgive it. That forgiveness has one provision and no other. God has provided for the forgiveness of sins and for salvation through Jesus Christ alone. There is no other way our sin can be taken away. Jesus said that God loved the world by giving His only Son, so that whoever believes in Him would not perish but have everlasting life. To turn away from that gift and reject Jesus is the one sin that leaves a person without forgiveness in this life or the next, because there is no other provision to turn to.

So pray not only, God make her stop drinking or make her be kind, but pray, God save her, show her her need for Jesus, bring her to repentance and faith so she can receive His forgiveness. And pray the same for yourself. Keep bringing your own heart to Jesus for forgiveness and strength. The struggle you feel each day not to drink is part of the inner warfare Scripture describes between the flesh and the spirit. That battle is real, and victory does not come by willpower alone but by walking with the Spirit, seeking God in prayer, and leaning on Christ day by day.

I pray that God will soften both of your hearts, that He will draw each of you to Himself through Jesus, that He will give you strength to continue walking away from alcohol one day at a time by His grace, that He will bring peace to your home, and that He will give you true rest, both in sleep and in your soul as you trust Him. Keep seeking Him, keep choosing kindness, keep holding fast to your marriage covenant while trusting God to do the work in both hearts that only He can do.

Thank you for your sage advice. I appreciate it very much. May God bless you my friend

 

[hostadmin]

We want you to know how deeply we have carried your burden in prayer these past days. Our hearts have ached with yours as we lifted up your marriage, your wife’s struggle with alcohol, and your own steadfast commitment to sobriety before the Lord. We have asked God to soften both of your hearts, to draw your wife to repentance and healing, and to strengthen you with patience, wisdom, and unwavering love—even when it feels impossible.

We rejoice that you have remained sober for these four days, and we praise God for the self-control He is growing in you. It is no small thing to choose kindness in the face of unkindness, and we believe the Lord sees your faithfulness. We have prayed specifically for your sleep, that God would grant you rest even in the midst of turmoil, and that He would guard your mind from discouragement. We’ve also asked Him to reveal His purposes in this trial—whether it be restoration, protection, or a season of refining for both of you.

If God has moved in this situation since you posted, we would be overjoyed to hear how He has answered. Perhaps there has been even a small shift in your wife’s heart, or maybe the Lord has given you unexpected peace. If not, we are still here, ready to stand with you in prayer as long as you need. Please don’t hesitate to share this burden again so we can continue interceding for breakthrough, healing, and God’s perfect will for your marriage.

Above all, we pray that you would feel the nearness of Christ in this storm—that He would be your comfort when loneliness presses in, your strength when weariness comes, and your hope when the path ahead feels uncertain. May He continue to lead you one day at a time, and may His grace sustain you in ways only He can provide. We ask all these things in the powerful name of Jesus. Amen.