We understand your heart’s cry for clarity, healing, and God’s perfect timing in your life. Your words carry deep longing—both for purpose and for relationships that align with God’s will, free from the pain of the past. Let us first address the foundation of all we seek: **salvation and access to God through Jesus Christ alone.** You mention the blood of Jesus and God’s grace, which tells us you know the power of His sacrifice. Yet we must emphasize that *there is no other name under heaven given among men by which we must be saved* (Acts 4:12, WEB). Every prayer, every plea for God’s will, must be rooted in the authority of Jesus Christ, for He is the Way, the Truth, and the Life (John 14:6). Without Him, we have no access to the Father. If you have not surrendered your life fully to Christ—believing in His death and resurrection for your sins—we urge you to do so today. Repentance and faith in Him alone bring true freedom and the promise of eternal life.
Now, let us speak to the longing in your heart for relationships and timing. You ask about "life in *your* time" and reference men from your past who were not "lovers forever." Sister, we must gently but firmly address this: **God’s design for intimacy is sacred and reserved for marriage between one man and one woman (Genesis 2:24, Hebrews 13:4).** Any physical or emotional intimacy outside of this covenant—whether fornication, adultery, or even deep emotional entanglements with those who are not your spouse—is sin before God. If your past includes relationships where boundaries were crossed, we urge you to repent and seek His cleansing. The blood of Jesus *is* sufficient to wash away every sin (1 John 1:9), but true freedom comes when we align our lives with His Word, not our desires.
You also mention DNA and God’s will. While we don’t fully understand your reference, we know this: **Your identity is not found in biology, past mistakes, or even your longings—it is found in Christ.** You are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14), and God’s plan for you is good (Jeremiah 29:11). But His "time" is not ours to demand. Instead, we are called to trust Him, even in waiting. If you are seeking a spouse, we pray you would seek a *godly* husband—one who loves the Lord above all and is committed to biblical marriage. Courtship should be intentional, pure, and directed toward covenant, not temporary fulfillment. Flee from any relationship that dishonors God, even if it breaks your heart to let go. His grace *is* sufficient (2 Corinthians 12:9), and His healing is deeper than any earthly love.
Lastly, we sense a fear of brokenness in your words. Beloved, **God often breaks us to remake us.** A heart surrendered to Him may ache, but it is never abandoned. If you are carrying shame, regret, or bitterness from past relationships, lay it at the cross. Jesus bore your pain so you wouldn’t have to. His yoke is easy, and His burden is light (Matthew 11:30)—but you must release the weight of the past to take hold of it.
Let us pray for you now:
*Heavenly Father, we lift this precious sister to You, knowing You see the depths of her heart. Lord, if she has not fully surrendered to Christ, convict her now. Draw her into Your arms, and let her find her identity in You alone. Wash her clean of every sin—every past relationship that dishonored You, every moment of doubt or fear. Father, heal her heart from brokenness and align her desires with Your Word. If she longs for marriage, prepare her to be a godly wife and bring a man after Your own heart to lead her in righteousness. But first, let her find completeness in You. Teach her to wait on Your timing, trusting that Your grace is sufficient for every need. Break any chain of sin or idolatry in her life, and fill her with Your peace. We rebuke the enemy’s lies that she is defined by her past or her longings. She is Yours, Lord. Cover her with the blood of Jesus and lead her into the fullness of Your will. In the mighty name of Jesus Christ, we pray. Amen.*
Sister, we encourage you to spend time in God’s Word daily, especially in Psalms for healing and Proverbs for wisdom. Surround yourself with believers who will speak truth into your life. If you are struggling with temptation or unresolved sin, confess it to a mature Christian sister or pastor who can walk with you in accountability. God’s best for you is worth the wait—**do not settle for less than His perfect will.** Stand firm, and trust that He who began a good work in you will complete it (Philippians 1:6). We are praying for you.