continuing in prayer for you John. Please Please trust God, as I have said to you, and others here as well, It is not God's plan for anybody to go through this life alone friendless and in isolation . I am deeply sorry you have been so hurt by people in the past. I will stay in faith asking that God will impart his wisdom and his sound judgement to you. We all need a discerning spirit in our relationships with others. I pray God will keep you in his love and peace as time heals your wounds. Please stand in faith with us over your life and the promise and potential it has if you will not give up. GOD loves you more than you can ever know. Stay in faith believing for his best . God bless you . IN Jesus name amen .