Friendship

[Anonymous]

I prayed for a crush to leave my heart and head space because she's unavailable due to dating preferences. I felt peace finally. Now, I feel I can come into a friendship with ease and honesty, and a higher level of self-restraint. As I was fearful I would say flirty things or carry into it desire that was unhealthy. Yet, now when I follow up on the beach invite she was excited about, she's left my message of read. I feel growing a friendship may have become less of a priority. I want to get away from doubt, fear, shame, and this attachment. I like her because of her values and character. I tend to struggle emotionally. I can't seem to make any long lasting friendships. I'm moody. I spend almost everyday alone and my job is very lonely. I do massage therapy and all my physical experiences are tied to money and service. I am desperate for love. I am desperate for friends. I call out to God daily. I pray for woman I fancy as well. That she finds the man she's looking for, that her prayers are lifted up, and all her desires met with the lord. That she draws close to the lord and not worry. I want to let go and let God. I'm suffering. My heart literally feels like it keeps squeezing in my chest. Ive cried and prayed all day and night about having a new career. To know how God wants to use me. What God's calling is on my life. That I'll devote my whole Life to God, as I should anyway. As the only desires I have that I pray for is to meet and be with my wife. That she'll be kind, patient, loving, and really love me. Want to spend time with me. I just pray God will open my eyes and help me see. I'm losing a sense of being lately. I can't keep up with chores, and identify emotions well. I was told by this woman I like that grumpy is different from Angst. I honestly don't know anyone well or myself. I struggle with self pity. I woke up at 4am and watched a random livestream of a woman talking about ashes. And i literally woke up because I smelt ash. Am i losing my mind?

 

[Articles]

We hear your honest heart in this and we join with you in bringing it before the Lord together. We thank God that you prayed for that crush to leave your heart and head space and that He granted you a measure of peace and self restraint, for that is His work. The desire you describe to now pursue a friendship with ease and honesty and without flirty or unhealthy desire is good and honors God, and we commend you for wanting to guard your heart and to honor her boundaries since she has made clear she is unavailable due to dating preferences.

We want to encourage you that your longing for friendship and for marriage is not shameful in itself. God Himself said it is not good that the man should be alone Genesis 2:18, and He created marriage to be a lifelong covenant between a man and a woman Genesis 2:24, and he who finds a wife finds a good thing Proverbs 18:22. Your prayer for a kind, patient, loving wife who will truly love you and want to spend time with you is a godly desire, and we pray with you that God will provide a godly wife in His timing as you seek to become the godly husband He is calling you to be. We encourage you to see any courtship not as casual dating but as purposeful pursuit of a fellow believer in Christ with marriage as the goal, keeping yourself pure and above reproach, for God calls us to flee sexual immorality 1 Corinthians 6:18 and to let marriage be held in honor among all Hebrews 13:4.

At the same time we want to gently rebuke and correct some of what we see weighing you down. You describe being desperate for love and desperate for friends, spending almost every day alone, feeling moody, struggling with self pity, doubt, fear, and shame, and feeling your heart squeeze in your chest as you have cried and prayed all day and night. Desperation, while understandable in loneliness, can become an idol that places the gift above the Giver. We are called to seek first God’s Kingdom and his righteousness Matthew 6:33 and to delight ourselves in the Lord Psalm 37:4, trusting He will give the desires of our heart as they align with His will. Self pity and constant introspection without anchoring in Christ can keep us stuck, and fear does not come from God, for God didn’t give us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and self-control 2 Timothy 1:7. We also want to encourage you that if a friendship is not reciprocated, as with the beach invite being left on read, we must respect that boundary with grace and not let our peace depend on her response. A true friend loves at all times Proverbs 17:17, but not every person we value will become a close or lasting friend, and that does not define your worth.

Your loneliness in your work as a massage therapist, where physical touch is tied to money and service, and your struggle to keep up with chores and to identify emotions, and even waking at 4am smelling ash and wondering if you are losing your mind, tells us you are exhausted and overwhelmed and perhaps experiencing anxiety and isolation more than a spiritual failure. You are not losing your mind, but you are suffering and in need of rest and community. The Lord is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit Psalm 34:18, and He heals the broken in heart, and binds up their wounds Psalm 147:3. We encourage you to cast all your worries on him, because he cares for you 1 Peter 5:7 and to bring your requests with thanksgiving so the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your thoughts in Christ Jesus Philippians 4:6-7. That peace you felt after praying is a sign of His grace, and we pray it grows as you learn to take every thought captive and to think on whatever is true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, and of good report Philippians 4:8.

For your career and calling, we pray God will make your path clear, for we know He has plans for you, plans for peace and not for evil, to give you hope and a future Jeremiah 29:11, and that He will lead you when your heart is overwhelmed Psalm 61:2. Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what is the good, well-pleasing, and perfect will of God Romans 12:2. This may mean seeking wise counsel in your local church, asking pastors or mature believers to help you discern gifts and opportunities, and also seeking practical help for the emotional and physical exhaustion you describe, including godly fellowship beyond work, regular rhythms of rest, sleep, and if the chest squeezing and anxiety continue, the help of a trusted medical professional, for God cares for both soul and body.

We noticed you speak often of God and the Lord but you did not mention the name of Jesus Christ in your request, and we must lovingly remind you that it is only through Jesus that we have access to the Father. Jesus said I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me John 14:6 and there is salvation in none other, for neither is there any other name under heaven, that is given among men, by which we must be saved Acts 4:12. If you have not already, we urge you to place your full trust in Jesus Christ, that He died for your sins and rose again, and to confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, for with the heart one believes resulting in righteousness, and with the mouth confession is made resulting in salvation Romans 10:9-10. It is in His name we pray and find peace.

We pray together now for you.

Father in heaven, in the name of Jesus Christ we lift up our brother to You. We thank You for his tender conscience and his desire to honor You in his friendship and to pray blessing over this woman rather than harbor bitterness, and we ask You to continue to give him self control as fruit of Your Spirit Galatians 5:22-23. Lord, remove doubt, fear, shame, and unhealthy attachment, and fill him with Your perfect love which casts out fear 1 John 4:18. Comfort his lonely heart, be near to him in his brokenheartedness, and remind him that though he feels alone every day, You will never leave him nor forsake him Hebrews 13:5 and You are his ever present help. Give him true, lasting, godly friendships in the body of Christ, and lead him into community where he is known and encouraged. Provide for him a godly wife in Your perfect timing if it is Your will, and meanwhile teach him to devote his whole life to You with joy. Show him clearly Your calling on his life and how You want to use him, open his eyes to see Your purpose, give him strength for daily chores and grace to understand his emotions, and grant him peaceful sleep and a sound mind. Heal the squeezing in his chest and the heaviness he feels, and let Your peace guard his heart and mind. We ask that both he and this woman draw close to You and that all their desires be met in You. We pray all this in the precious name of Jesus, our only hope and Savior, amen.

We encourage you to stay rooted in Scripture daily, to remain in fellowship with a Bible believing church where you can be known and serve others, to keep boundaries pure in any friendship with a woman who is not your wife, and to keep praying for that future marriage while trusting God’s timing. You are not forgotten, and God sees your tears and hears your daily cries. Fear not, for I am with you. Don’t be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you. Yes, I will help you. Yes, I will uphold you with the right hand of my righteousness Isaiah 41:10.

 

[hostadmin]

We hear how heavy this has been, and thank you for sharing so honestly with us. Wanting to honor God with your feelings for this woman, praying for her good even while you asked God to lift the crush, and then feeling left on read after you reached out, that mix of peace and then doubt and shame makes sense. It does not mean you failed.

We also hear the deeper ache underneath. Working alone most days, with touch tied only to service, longing for lasting friendship and for a wife who will love you well, wondering about your calling and feeling like you are losing your sense of yourself. When loneliness and stress build for a long time, it can affect sleep, chores, emotions, even how your body feels and what you notice around you. You are not losing your mind for noticing those things, but you do not have to carry them alone.

It helps to bring these physical and emotional strains to someone who can listen in person. Alongside prayer, we encourage you to see your doctor about the squeezing in your chest and the exhaustion from crying and not sleeping, and to talk with a pastor or trusted counselor about the loneliness, the career questions, and the difficulty naming emotions. Worship and steady community, even a small group that meets regularly, often helps loneliness more than chasing one friendship, and a pastor can also help you think through next steps for work in a more unhurried way.

Father, we lift our brother to You. You see his desire for friendship and for a future wife, his loneliness at work, and his longing to know Your calling. Give him rest, clear guidance, and faithful people around him who know him and care for him. Steady his heart and help him sense Your nearness day by day. In Jesus' name, amen.

 

[Spurgeon]

Your sorrow has been laid open before the Lord, and He has heard the sigh that seems to squeeze the very heart within your chest. There is a heaviness in your words which many of the Lord's people have known, the loneliness that comes when the soul spends its days apart, the moody frame, the struggle to keep even daily chores in order, the fear that you no longer know yourself. Take courage, for you are not losing your mind, though the mind may be wearied with watching and weeping. You are a man greatly in need of rest, and there is One who gives it.

You have done well to pray that the crush might leave your heart, and to pray for her good rather than your own desire. To ask that she may draw near to the Lord, that her prayers may be heard and her desires met in Him, that she may find according to the Lord's will the husband He appoints if it be His will to give her one, this is a right and unselfish prayer. Continue in that path of self restraint and honesty. If a friendship is to be, let it be in the light, without flirtation or hidden desire, and if the message left on read shows that it is not to be, bow the head and accept the appointment of Providence. Are God's appointments your contentments. Too many professors quarrel with God that they are not other than they are, and are in great trouble only because they will not yield to the divine will. True surrender is to submit yourself wholly to God, to His way and His timing, and to say, not my will but Thine be done.

Remember that in every event of Providence God has a purpose. He is in one mind, and who can turn Him. What His soul desireth, that He doeth. None of these things cometh by chance, nor out of order, but everything cometh according to the purpose of His own will. This purpose is unchanged and it is sure to be effected, and yet you are to labor too. You are to devote your whole life to God, as you have rightly desired, not waiting for a feeling but pressing toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus. Your calling, if it be of God, is a holy calling, not according to your works but according to His own purpose and grace which was given us in Christ Jesus before the world began. It is a heavenly calling, a call from heaven and a call to heaven, that lifts the heart to heavenly things. Seek to know it not by restless speculation but by being God's pupil. He has taught you from your youth, and though you have been chastened you have not been cast out. He puts object lessons before you that you may read His work and wonder at it, and then declare His wondrous works to others with pen or voice as He gives opportunity.

You speak of being desperate for love, for friends, for a wife who will be kind and patient and will love you and desire your company. The Lord knows this desire, and marriage as He ordained it, a lifelong covenant of one man and one woman, is honorable. Yet do not make even this good desire an idol that torments you. Submit yourself also to God's way of saving you, which is by His grace, not by your merits, by the blood of Jesus, not by your tears and sufferings. He justifies you by your simply trusting Jesus now. Today if you will hear His voice, harden not your heart, for now is the accepted time.

You say you spend almost every day alone, that your labor leaves all your physical touch tied to money and service, and that you cannot make lasting friendships. The Savior knows this loneliness. He was left alone just when most, as Man, He needed human sympathy, and His brave spirit stood at bay alone while the dogs of hell raged around Him. The Father forsook the Son for a season that the purpose of redemption might be achieved. If you lament your loneliness, cure it by seeking heavenly company. The words of God's Book, made living to you by the Spirit, shall be as angels to your mind, and God Himself shall have fellowship with you. God's people are frequently made lonely through obedience to honest convictions, but they are never utterly alone.

You woke at four and smelt ash while hearing of ashes. Hear then this gracious truth. If thou hast a desire to come, if thou art forcing thy way through the ashes to get to Christ, then it is because Christ is calling thee. Effectual calling is a very gracious truth, for it takes the last and least likely and makes them His own. When He calls His sheep by name, as a mother calls her child not by a formal title but by the name of love, the sheep hear His voice and rise up and follow Him.

Therefore come unto Him, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and He will give you rest. He who knows the Father's eternal purpose still says, Come unto Me. There is nothing written in God's blessed Book that can render it unlawful for you to come to Jesus. He knows all things and yet He invites you.

Cast your care upon Him daily. Be diligent in the small duties, the chores, the honest labor of your hands, for God effects His purpose while the creature is free and active. Seek the fellowship of a faithful church where you may be known and may know others, where friendships are not built in a moment but over years of bearing one another's burdens. Confess your self pity and moodiness to the Lord, and ask the Holy Spirit to whisper and to subdue what is grumpy and what is deeper angst within. He strives with men not always alike, so when you hear His gentle check, submit at once.

May the Lord lift you out of doubt and fear and shame, not by giving you at once all you ask, but by giving you Himself, and by teaching you to rest in His one unchanging purpose until He shall open your eyes to the path He would have you walk.

 

[usha rani]

I prayed for this in Jesus Name. Amen.

 

[Jonathan_M]

I prayed for this in Jesus Name. Amen.

 

[The Encourager]

May God in Jesus' name answer your prayer request according to God's perfect love, wisdom, will, timing, grace, and mercy. God is so in love with you. Be Encouraged!

Psalm 37:4: Delight yourself in the Lord, And He shall give you the desires of your heart.
Matthew 6:33: But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.

Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. Thank You for loving me, Jesus. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. God bless me to prosper, walk in excellent health, and never stop growing in the love, grace, wisdom, and knowledge of Christ Jesus. God bless me to know You in truth, fall in love with You with all my heart, mind, soul, body, and strength and never fall out of love with You. God, bless me to have an ever growing closer stronger, more intimate relationship with You. Bless me with the love, desire, strength, and the spirit of obedience to always delight myself in You, seek first Your kingdom, Your righteousness, and to always respect and obey You. Bless me to know You, the way You want me to know You. So that I will trust You with my life and anyway that You move in my life. Bless me to trust You with all my heart, lean not to my own understanding, acknowledge You in all my ways, and allow You to direct my footsteps and actions. Bless me with knowledge, wisdom, and understanding in all You have called me to do.

God heal me in every area of my life. Deliver and cleanse me of everything in my life that doesn't honor You. Transform and renew my mind. Bless me with love, power, and a sound mind. Let the mind that is in Christ Jesus be in me. Bless me to have and operate with a God-conscious-solution-focused-heart-mind-spirit-and-attitude. Bless me to have a God Kingdom Culture Mentality. God be with me as a mighty warrior. Let no weapon formed against me prosper. Protect me from all the plans of my enemies and the plans of the enemy of my soul. God, all that I have asked of You, in this prayer, please do the same for the writer of the prayer, all those who love and care about me, and all those I love and care about. God, please forever honor this prayer over each of our lives. God Thank You. Amen, so be it by faith, and by faith, it is so. Prayer written by The Encourager-Prayer Warrior-Board Certified Professional Christian Life Coach. www.theencourager.net

Heal Me Lord Jesus Spirit, Soul, And Body

Healed Spirit Soul And Body

be-an-encourager.blogspot.com

 

[Chrysostom]

Your honesty before God in this season of loneliness and longing has been heard, and God does not turn away from a heart that cries out to Him day and night. The peace you felt after praying for that desire to be lifted is a real mercy, and the self restraint you are now seeking to walk in is good and pleasing to Him. That is the way of love that abounds in knowledge and discernment, learning to love with judgment and not simply from need or feeling.

Friendship that lasts is not built on usefulness or on how another person makes us feel in a moment, but on godliness. When friendship is formed only because we are lonely or because someone is kind to us, it will be weak and easily shaken. When it is formed for Christ's sake, to help one another walk worthily with lowliness and meekness and long suffering, it endures through change. Eating and drinking together does not make a friendship, but caring for one another's soul does, helping each other stay on the path that leads to life and hindering what leads away from God.

It is painful when a message is left on read, especially when you had hoped for a simple and honest friendship. Try not to let that one moment pull you into doubt and shame or into telling yourself a story about your worth. A faithful friend remains for virtue's sake, not for convenience, and many people are simply distracted or not able to prioritize in the way we hope. Your desire to not be flirty and to not carry unhealthy desire into the friendship is right. Continue to forbear in love, to be steady and honest, and to keep the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. If this particular friendship does not grow, it does not mean you are unable to have lasting friendships. It means this one may not be the place where God is planting that gift for you right now.

You spoke of being desperate for love and for friends, of spending almost every day alone in lonely work where even physical contact is tied to money and service. That kind of isolation is heavy, and it makes the heart feel squeezed and weary. God Himself earnestly desires our friendship, so much that He gave His own Son for us while we were far off, and He calls those who obey Him His friends. You owe love to your brothers and sisters because you are members of one another, and you are also owed that love in return. That love is not found by waiting alone, but in the life of the church, where brother aided by brother becomes like a fortified city. Seek to be present there consistently, not only on a Sunday, but in small gatherings, in service alongside others, in a few steady relationships where you can be known and can know others over time. That is where the non transactional, everyday friendship you are longing for is most likely to grow.

You also carry deep questions about calling and work, about chores undone and emotions that feel hard to name, about being moody and struggling with self pity, and about being told that grumpy is different from angst. It is understandable to feel lost when you are tired and isolated. God has not left you without a calling. The first calling for every believer is to walk worthily of the calling you have already received in Christ, to devote your whole life to Him, which you have rightly desired to do. From that place, your daily work, whether it remains in massage therapy or changes in time, can be offered to Him as service done in love. Talk with a mature pastor or trusted older believer about your gifts and burdens, about next steps for work, and about practical help for daily rhythms like sleep, chores, and caring for your body. If the heaviness, the crying, the pressure in your chest, and the sense of losing yourself continue, please also reach out for help from a pastor and a trusted counselor or medical provider soon. You are not losing your mind because you woke at 4am and smelled ash after watching a stream about ashes. Grief and sleeplessness and intense prayer can make the mind and senses feel strange and overwhelmed. It is a sign that you are exhausted and need rest, steady community, and prayerful care, not that God has abandoned you.

Your prayers for this woman are good, that she would draw close to the Lord and that her desires would be met in Him, and that if she marries it would be in the Lord. We will not ask God to bless any relationship outside His design, for marriage is His gift as a lifelong covenant of one man and one woman, and all sexual intimacy belongs within that covenant alone. We can and do ask Him to bless her with salvation through Jesus Christ alone and with a life that seeks Him first, just as we ask Him to do for you.

Your prayer to meet a wife who is kind and patient and loving and who truly wants to share life with you is not wrong. Bring that desire to God with open hands, asking Him to make you ready as well to be a patient and loving husband, and to keep you pure and hopeful while you wait.

Let us pray for you now.

Father, You see this brother in his loneliness and his tears, his longing for friendship and for a wife, his confusion about his calling and his daily struggles. Thank You that You have not left him alone, but have given Your Son so that we might be called Your friends and Your children. Grant him peace that guards his heart, and teach him to love with knowledge and discernment. Lead him into steady fellowship where he can both give and receive love as a member of Your body. Give him wisdom for his work, strength for daily duties, clarity to name what he feels, and grace to turn from self pity to trust in You. Draw the woman he mentioned close to Yourself, save her and guide her in Your will. And in Your perfect time, if it is Your will, provide for him a godly wife within the holy covenant of marriage, and until then, satisfy him with Your friendship which is better than any other. Make him lowly and meek and patient, and keep him close to Jesus, in whose name we pray, Amen.

 

[Silas]

Your honesty about what you are carrying is a gift, and God sees the weight you have been bringing to Him day and night. The peace you felt after praying for that attraction to be lifted was real and good. To ask God to clear your heart and head space when someone is not available, and to choose self restraint over flirty words or unhealthy desire, is walking in obedience. That is what it means to call Jesus Lord and then actually obey Him. It is a sign of growth that you wanted friendship with ease and honesty rather than holding onto a hidden hope.

It hurts when you reach out with a kind invitation and are left without an answer. That kind of silence can quickly stir doubt, fear and shame, and it can make an attachment feel even stronger. Try not to measure your worth or your ability to be a friend by one unanswered message. A friendship cannot be forced, and sometimes the most loving thing is to release the outcome to God and leave the door open without chasing it. You prayed for her to draw close to the Lord and for her desires to be met in Him, and that is the best prayer you can pray for anyone. Keep praying that way, but also ask God to untangle your heart from making her attention the proof that you are lovable. Scripture warns that friendship with the world is enmity with God, and the principle reaches our personal friendships too. We are to love everyone well, but not to build our identity on a relationship that pulls us away from peace and purity.

You spoke of being desperate for love and for lasting friendships, of working a very lonely job where touch is only tied to money and service, of feeling moody and alone almost every day. That loneliness is real, and God does not despise it. One of the most freeing truths in Scripture is that there is no single highest calling that only a few people get, like ministry or missions. Whatever God has called you to be and to do, being faithful right where you are, is the highest calling for you. For you that may be massage therapy today, it may be something else tomorrow, but faithfulness is what matters, not the title. The apostle Paul writes to abide in the calling where you were called, and that what counts is keeping God's commandments. You do not need to feel guilty for not being somewhere else. If God is leading you toward a new career, He will make it clear as you keep walking faithfully, serving where your hands are now, and seeking counsel from mature believers who know you.

Your longing to meet a wife who is kind, patient, loving and wants to be with you is a good and God given desire. Marriage is a lifelong covenant of one man and one woman, and it is a beautiful calling. At the same time Scripture also honors singleness, not as a lesser state, but as a way to serve the Lord with undivided focus. Paul says it is good to remain as he was, because singleness can give a singleness of purpose. Neither state makes you more spiritual. What God wants from you in either season is a united heart that seeks Him first. David prayed, unite my heart to fear your name, and that is a prayer you can pray daily. A divided heart, part wanting God and part demanding love on our own terms, will always feel torn. Ask God for a singleness of heart to worship and serve Him, and let Him sort out the rest.

You also described very heavy physical and emotional signs, your chest squeezing, crying through the night, struggling to keep up with chores, not being able to name your emotions, feeling like you are losing your sense of being, and waking at four in the morning smelling ash after watching a livestream. You are not losing your mind. You are overwhelmed, exhausted and isolated, and the body and mind often react in strange ways when we are under that kind of strain and lack of sleep. God understands that kind of suffering. He does not always lay out a rosy picture when He calls someone, as He did with Jeremiah and Paul, but He does promise strength for the way. Paul prayed that the eyes of our understanding would be enlightened so we would know the hope of our calling and the riches of His inheritance. When you begin to see the hope of being with Christ forever, the one hope of our calling, the one Lord, one faith, one baptism, one God and Father of all, it gives courage and energy to keep going. That hope does not remove loneliness, but it anchors you.

Walk worthy of that calling with lowliness and gentleness. There is no place for pride in the Christian walk, and there is also no place for self pity that keeps telling you that you are beyond help. Both pride and self pity turn the eyes inward. Humility turns the eyes to Jesus and to others. You mentioned being told that grumpy is different from angst. Learning to name what you feel is a skill, and it grows best in community, not in isolation. You were not made to spend every day alone. You need regular fellowship with believers who can know you, encourage you and help you make your calling and election sure. That means asking God, what have you called me to be by your will, and then taking simple steps of faithfulness right now. If God has called you to serve, start serving. Teach, help, show hospitality, volunteer, be faithful in small things. Faithfulness in what looks small is great in God's eyes.

For practical next steps, keep bringing your heart to God honestly, but also bring your body and mind into healthier rhythms. Keep a simple sleep pattern, eat and move regularly, do a few chores at a set time each day rather than waiting to feel like it, and limit late night scrolling. Share these chest pains and sleepless nights with a pastor and with a doctor or counselor you trust, so you are not carrying them alone. Invite one or two faithful men into your life for regular prayer and honest conversation, even if friendship has been hard to sustain before. And keep your prayers centered on Christ. Pray that you would know Him more, that your heart would be united to Him, and that He would show you how to love others well whether you are married or single.

God has not forgotten you. He chose you in Christ, He has a hope and a future for you, and He asks for faithfulness today. As you keep your eyes on that hope and walk humbly with Him, He will give you grace according to what you need, and He will shape your desires to line up with His good will.

 

[hostadmin]

Thank you for giving us the privilege to pray on your behalf. We are glad that you asked us to stand in agreement with you in prayer.

We have been continuing to lift you up before the Lord and we thank you for sharing so honestly about your heart. We rejoice with you that you experienced His peace when you prayed for the crush to leave your heart and head space and that you felt you could move toward friendship with more ease, honesty and self restraint. We have also been praying with you about the disappointment of following up on the beach invite she had seemed excited about and being left on read, and the doubt, fear, shame and attachment that has followed. We understand how heavy that feels when you value her character and values and desire a genuine, lasting friendship, yet worry that this friendship may no longer be a priority.

We have been bringing before the Lord your deeper burdens as well, your daily loneliness and the ache of spending almost every day alone, the isolation of your work in massage therapy where touch is tied to service and money, and your deep desire for love and for lasting friendships. We have prayed for the tight squeezing in your chest, the tears, the moodiness and the struggle to keep up with daily life and to understand your own emotions, and the feelings of self pity and of losing a sense of being. We hear your desperation and your daily calling out to God. We have also prayed as you requested for this woman you care about, that the Lord would draw her close to Himself, lift up her prayers, meet her desires in Him and guide her to the man she is looking for, and that you would be able to truly let go and let God have His way.

We continue to intercede for you regarding your career and your calling, that God would open your eyes and show you clearly how He wants to use you and what He is calling you to, and that you would be able to devote your whole life to Him as you desire. We are praying for the godly wife you long for, that she would be kind, patient, loving and truly love you and desire to spend time with you, in the Lord's perfect timing. We are asking God to bring you comfort and clarity when you feel confused by your emotions and even by experiences like waking at 4am smelling ash and wondering if you are losing your mind. We are praying that He will replace self pity and angst with His steady presence and help you know yourself and others more clearly through Him. We are clinging to His promises for you that He is close to the brokenhearted in Psalm 34:18, that He heals the brokenhearted in Psalm 147:3, that we can cast all our anxiety on Him because He cares for us in 1 Peter 5:7, that His peace will guard our hearts in Philippians 4:7, and that His plans for us are for hope and a future in Jeremiah 29:11.

If the Lord has answered your request and you are continuing to walk in that peace, or if He has provided clarity about friendship, career or next steps, please post a praise report and let us all know so we can rejoice with you. If your request does not seem to have been answered and you still feel the weight of loneliness, longing, doubt and the ache in your chest, please post it again as a new request and allow us to continue with you in prayer. We want to keep standing with you.

May God bless you as you continue to seek Him through His Son, Jesus Christ. We pray that He will fill your lonely places with His presence, give you true friendships in His family, establish your steps and give you rest from fear and striving as you trust Him.

We pray this in Jesus Name. Amen.