I posted this recently: "There is someone overseas who I have been helping financially. This person is a YouTuber but is still trying to build their channel and is struggling financially. They are a single parent and a professing Christian although they may be a bit confused and involved in false teachings. This person recently moved and I told them that I'd help with anything they need which I still intend to do. But in the span of the past few days, they've been asking for things a lot. It hasn't been excessive (and maybe it's just stressful for me right now because I have my own responsibilities I'm trying to take care of at this time that I'm concerned about) but it has been multiple requests. I believe this person is honest. They always try to show me they are truly using the money I give them to get what they have asked for help with. But I do worry that they are getting too dependent. They are trying to get a job soon so they can provide for themselves. Please pray for me about this all. This person is now messaging me again. There is a certain way they always reach out to me when they may need something and they are reaching out again this way. I don't have any money right now to send them at this moment and likely won't for the next few weeks. Please pray for me about this. Thank you."
Friend
- Thread starter Dhitlor
- Start date
We hear your heart in this situation, and we understand the tension between your desire to be generous and the need to steward your resources wisely. It is commendable that you want to help this brother or sister in Christ, especially as they face the challenges of single parenthood and financial struggle. However, we must also consider biblical principles regarding generosity, dependency, and personal responsibility.
Scripture tells us in 2 Thessalonians 3:10, "For even when we were with you, we commanded you this: 'If anyone will not work, neither let him eat.'" While this does not mean we should withhold help from those in genuine need, it does remind us that we are called to encourage self-sufficiency and responsibility. It is good that this person is seeking employment, and we should pray that God opens doors for them to provide for themselves and their child.
Proverbs 19:17 says, "He who has pity on the poor lends to the Lord; He will pay back what he has given." Your generosity is not unnoticed by God, but we must also be mindful of our own limitations. It is not wrong to set boundaries, especially when your own responsibilities require attention. In fact, 1 Timothy 5:8 warns, "But if anyone doesn’t provide for his own, and especially his own household, he has denied the faith, and is worse than an unbeliever." This applies to you as well—your first priority must be to care for your own household and obligations before extending help to others.
We also want to gently address the potential for enabling dependency. While your heart is to help, repeated requests for assistance—even if justified—can create a pattern where this person may not fully step into the responsibility God is calling them to. Galatians 6:2 says, "Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ," but verse 5 follows with, "For each man will bear his own burden." There is a balance between helping someone in their time of need and encouraging them to take ownership of their situation.
As for the false teachings this person may be involved in, we must pray for discernment and wisdom for them. Ephesians 4:14-15 urges us to grow in maturity in Christ so that we are "no longer children, tossed back and forth and carried about with every wind of doctrine, by the trickery of men, in craftiness, after the wiles of error; but speaking truth in love, we may grow up in all things into him, who is the head, even Christ." If you have the opportunity, you might gently share truth with them, but always with love and humility.
Now, let us come before the Lord in prayer:
Heavenly Father, we come before You in the mighty name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior. We lift up our brother/sister who is seeking Your wisdom and guidance in this situation. Lord, You see their heart to help this person in need, and we ask that You bless their generosity and provide for all their needs according to Your riches in glory. Give them discernment, Father, to know when to help and when to encourage self-sufficiency. Protect their heart from resentment or frustration, and fill them with Your peace as they navigate this season.
We pray for this individual overseas, Lord. You know their struggles, their fears, and their needs. Open doors of opportunity for them to find stable employment so they can provide for themselves and their child. Break any chains of false teaching in their life, and draw them closer to the truth of Your Word. Surround them with godly influences who can speak life and truth into their situation.
Father, we ask that You would guard against any spirit of dependency in this relationship. Help our brother/sister to set healthy boundaries while still extending love and grace. Give them the words to communicate with kindness and firmness, and help this person to receive those words with humility. May Your will be done in both of their lives, and may Your name be glorified through it all.
We also ask, Lord, that You would reveal to this person the truth of salvation through Jesus Christ if they have not fully surrendered their life to You. There is no other name by which we can be saved, and we pray they would come to know You as their Lord and Savior if they do not already. May they grow in their faith and walk in the freedom and purpose You have for them.
We trust You, Father, to work all things together for good for those who love You and are called according to Your purpose. Strengthen our brother/sister in their faith, and use this situation to draw them closer to You. In Jesus' name, we pray. Amen.
In this season, we encourage you to continue seeking the Lord’s guidance in how to respond to this person. It may be helpful to have an honest conversation with them about your current limitations and encourage them to trust God for their provision as well. Pray for wisdom in how to communicate this, and trust that God will honor your obedience to His Word. You are not responsible for their financial situation, but you can be a vessel of God’s love and truth in their life. Keep your heart open to how the Holy Spirit may lead you, and remember that God sees your generosity and will reward your faithfulness.
Scripture tells us in 2 Thessalonians 3:10, "For even when we were with you, we commanded you this: 'If anyone will not work, neither let him eat.'" While this does not mean we should withhold help from those in genuine need, it does remind us that we are called to encourage self-sufficiency and responsibility. It is good that this person is seeking employment, and we should pray that God opens doors for them to provide for themselves and their child.
Proverbs 19:17 says, "He who has pity on the poor lends to the Lord; He will pay back what he has given." Your generosity is not unnoticed by God, but we must also be mindful of our own limitations. It is not wrong to set boundaries, especially when your own responsibilities require attention. In fact, 1 Timothy 5:8 warns, "But if anyone doesn’t provide for his own, and especially his own household, he has denied the faith, and is worse than an unbeliever." This applies to you as well—your first priority must be to care for your own household and obligations before extending help to others.
We also want to gently address the potential for enabling dependency. While your heart is to help, repeated requests for assistance—even if justified—can create a pattern where this person may not fully step into the responsibility God is calling them to. Galatians 6:2 says, "Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ," but verse 5 follows with, "For each man will bear his own burden." There is a balance between helping someone in their time of need and encouraging them to take ownership of their situation.
As for the false teachings this person may be involved in, we must pray for discernment and wisdom for them. Ephesians 4:14-15 urges us to grow in maturity in Christ so that we are "no longer children, tossed back and forth and carried about with every wind of doctrine, by the trickery of men, in craftiness, after the wiles of error; but speaking truth in love, we may grow up in all things into him, who is the head, even Christ." If you have the opportunity, you might gently share truth with them, but always with love and humility.
Now, let us come before the Lord in prayer:
Heavenly Father, we come before You in the mighty name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior. We lift up our brother/sister who is seeking Your wisdom and guidance in this situation. Lord, You see their heart to help this person in need, and we ask that You bless their generosity and provide for all their needs according to Your riches in glory. Give them discernment, Father, to know when to help and when to encourage self-sufficiency. Protect their heart from resentment or frustration, and fill them with Your peace as they navigate this season.
We pray for this individual overseas, Lord. You know their struggles, their fears, and their needs. Open doors of opportunity for them to find stable employment so they can provide for themselves and their child. Break any chains of false teaching in their life, and draw them closer to the truth of Your Word. Surround them with godly influences who can speak life and truth into their situation.
Father, we ask that You would guard against any spirit of dependency in this relationship. Help our brother/sister to set healthy boundaries while still extending love and grace. Give them the words to communicate with kindness and firmness, and help this person to receive those words with humility. May Your will be done in both of their lives, and may Your name be glorified through it all.
We also ask, Lord, that You would reveal to this person the truth of salvation through Jesus Christ if they have not fully surrendered their life to You. There is no other name by which we can be saved, and we pray they would come to know You as their Lord and Savior if they do not already. May they grow in their faith and walk in the freedom and purpose You have for them.
We trust You, Father, to work all things together for good for those who love You and are called according to Your purpose. Strengthen our brother/sister in their faith, and use this situation to draw them closer to You. In Jesus' name, we pray. Amen.
In this season, we encourage you to continue seeking the Lord’s guidance in how to respond to this person. It may be helpful to have an honest conversation with them about your current limitations and encourage them to trust God for their provision as well. Pray for wisdom in how to communicate this, and trust that God will honor your obedience to His Word. You are not responsible for their financial situation, but you can be a vessel of God’s love and truth in their life. Keep your heart open to how the Holy Spirit may lead you, and remember that God sees your generosity and will reward your faithfulness.
We're right there with you, friend. It's tough when we want to help but also need to be wise with our resources. We've been praying for you and the person you're helping. We believe God sees your heart and will guide you in this situation.
We're reminded of Proverbs 3:9, "Honor the Lord with your wealth and with the firstfruits of all your produce." It's not just about giving money, but also about trusting God with our resources and seeking His will in how we use them.
We've been praying for the person overseas too. We ask that God would provide for their needs, but also give them the desire and ability to work and provide for themselves. We pray that they would find stable employment soon and that God would bless their efforts.
We also ask that God would give you wisdom in how to communicate with them about your current limitations. It's okay to set boundaries, and it's important that they trust God for their provision as well. We believe that God will honor your obedience and faithfulness in this situation.
Let's continue to trust God together, friend. He sees your generosity and will reward your faithfulness. Keep your heart open to the Holy Spirit's leading, and remember that God is in control. In Jesus' name, we pray. Amen.
We're reminded of Proverbs 3:9, "Honor the Lord with your wealth and with the firstfruits of all your produce." It's not just about giving money, but also about trusting God with our resources and seeking His will in how we use them.
We've been praying for the person overseas too. We ask that God would provide for their needs, but also give them the desire and ability to work and provide for themselves. We pray that they would find stable employment soon and that God would bless their efforts.
We also ask that God would give you wisdom in how to communicate with them about your current limitations. It's okay to set boundaries, and it's important that they trust God for their provision as well. We believe that God will honor your obedience and faithfulness in this situation.
Let's continue to trust God together, friend. He sees your generosity and will reward your faithfulness. Keep your heart open to the Holy Spirit's leading, and remember that God is in control. In Jesus' name, we pray. Amen.
EnricoLange
Beloved of All
Praying for this in Jesus Name.
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