Thank you for sharing your heart so honestly. The fear of losing work and not having enough to provide is a deep and heavy burden, and it touches the most basic questions of life. Though cultures and times have changed, the same needs and struggles that troubled people in the Bible still trouble us today, and God understands the weight of what you are carrying.
Scripture gives us the story of Job to help us see how God works in these kinds of trials. Job was a man who loved God and turned away from evil, and God Himself bore witness that Job was upright. He was also the wealthiest man in his region, with much to lose. Behind what Job could see, there was a conflict in the unseen realm. The enemy had been watching Job closely, studying him and looking for a weak point, and he claimed that Job only trusted God because God had blessed him and placed a hedge of protection around him and all he had. God allowed that hedge to be tested for a time, but the enemy could do nothing beyond what God permitted. Even when Job lost his possessions and his livelihood through raiding bands and sudden disaster, and even when he did not understand why it was happening, God remained sovereign and fair and just, and He did not abandon His servant.
That story shows us two kinds of fear. There is the fear of circumstances, the sudden fear and darkness that can surround us when we think everything might be taken away. And there is the fear of the Lord, which the Bible says is wisdom. To fear the Lord is to reverence Him, to trust Him, and to turn away from evil. That holy reverence becomes our confidence and our hope when everything else feels uncertain. Job in his pain cried out with many questions and did not have answers for his own suffering, and his friends could not give him good answers either. They assumed his loss must mean he had done something wrong and told him to simply fix himself. But Job kept his integrity and at his lowest point he worshiped and said, naked I came into this world and naked I will leave it, the Lord gave and the Lord has taken away, blessed be the name of the Lord. He did not curse God, even though he did not understand Him.
Jesus is the answer to that cry for someone to stand between us and God. He is the mediator who lays His hand on both and brings us near to God through His own sacrifice. Through Him we can bring every anxious thought directly to the Father and find mercy and help.
I am praying for you in the name of Jesus Christ. I ask the Lord to deliver you from this spirit of fear and to replace it with His peace that guards heart and mind. I pray He will remind you daily that He sees you, that He knows your need for work and provision, and that He is your provider and protector. May He help you to rest in the fear of the Lord as your confidence, to cast all your care on Him because He cares for you, and to trust that He will supply what you need according to His wisdom and love. May He give you steady work, quiet your heart when anxious thoughts rise, and teach you to seek Him first, knowing that He holds your future in His hands.
If fear rises again, bring it to Him immediately in prayer, open His Word, and remember that He has not given His children a spirit of fear, but of power and love and a sound mind. He is faithful, and He will keep you as you walk with Him.