We hear your burden about your second oldest son still living in your and your wife's apartment and the frustration you feel because he does nothing to help and spends his time watching TV. We understand the strain this puts on your marriage and your home, and we bring this before the Lord with you.
We want to gently but clearly address something in your request that does not align with biblical principles. You said he needs to live with his lady. If this lady is not his wife, God does not call him to live with her. That would be living together outside of marriage, which Scripture calls fornication and sexual immorality. We must not encourage our children to move from one disobedience into another. Hebrews 13:4 says Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the bed be undefiled: but God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterers. And 1 Corinthians 6:18 says Flee sexual immorality. Every sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body. If your son is in a relationship with a woman, the godly path is not cohabitation, but either to pursue courtship with the goal of marriage to a fellow Christian believer if God wills, or to live separately and pursue purity. Genesis 2:24 says Therefore a man will leave his father and his mother, and will join with his wife, and they will be one flesh. Leaving and joining is framed by marriage between a man and a woman, and we pray for that kind of holy commitment rather than a living arrangement that would dishonor God. If they are not ready for that lifelong covenant, then he should not live with her, but should become responsible for himself as a man.
We also see the issue of idleness and dishonoring your household. Scripture is clear that a child, even a grown child living under his parents' roof, is to honor his father and mother, and that a man is to work diligently. Ephesians 6:1-3 says Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your father and mother, which is the first commandment with a promise: that it may be well with you, and you may live long on the earth. And 2 Thessalonians 3:10 says For even when we were with you, we commanded you this: If anyone will not work, neither let him eat. Colossians 3:23 says Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord, and not for men. A son who sits idle and does not help in the home is not walking in the responsibility God has for him, and as parents you have a biblical right and duty to set loving but firm boundaries in your home.
We also noticed your request did not mention the name of Jesus Christ. We want to lovingly remind you that it is only through Jesus that we have access to God and that our prayers are heard. John 14:6 says Jesus said to him, I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me. And Acts 4:12 says There is salvation in none other, for neither is there any other name under heaven, that is given among men, by which we must be saved. We encourage you to bring every need in the name of Jesus, trusting in His death and resurrection for the forgiveness of sins, and believing that Romans 10:9 says that if you will confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved.
We pray together for you now.
Father in heaven, we come before You in the name of Jesus Christ, Your Son, asking for Your will to be done in this family and this home. Lord, we lift up this husband and wife who are weary and feel their home is not being honored. Grant them wisdom, unity, courage and grace to lead their household in love and truth. Give the father strength to speak with firmness and kindness, and give the wife peace as they seek to honor You together. We lift up their second oldest son to You. Lord, convict his heart where he has been idle and disrespectful, and turn him toward diligence, humility and honor for his parents. Teach him to work heartily as for You and to take responsibility for his own life. If he is in a relationship with a woman, Lord, we ask that You convict him about purity and the sanctity of marriage. If it is Your will for them to be married, lead them toward a godly, biblical marriage between a man and a woman that honors You, with counsel and preparation, and if not, give him the strength to flee sexual immorality and to live in a way that is holy before You. Provide for him a path to independence that is righteous, whether through work and his own housing, and give him a desire to be a godly man and perhaps a godly husband in the future. We ask that You restore peace to this apartment and that this family would seek You first above comfort or convenience. We pray this in the precious and powerful name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior, amen.
We encourage you to have a calm and clear conversation with your son, with your wife united with you, setting clear expectations and a timeline for him to become self supporting and to contribute to the household while he is there, and making clear that living with his girlfriend outside of marriage is not an option you can bless. Encourage him toward employment, stewardship, and if he desires marriage, toward pursuing it in a way that honors God, seeking a Christian believer and seeking pastoral counsel. Trust that as you honor God in your home, He will honor your faithfulness and provide the wisdom you need.
Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. Thank You for loving me, Jesus. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. God bless me to prosper, walk in excellent health, and never stop growing in the love, grace, wisdom, and knowledge of Christ Jesus. God bless me to know You in truth, fall in love with You with all my heart, mind, soul, body, and strength and never fall out of love with You. God, bless me to have an ever growing closer stronger, more intimate relationship with You. Bless me with the love, desire, strength, and the spirit of obedience to always delight myself in You, seek first Your kingdom, Your righteousness, and to always respect and obey You. Bless me to know You, the way You want me to know You. So that I will trust You with my life and anyway that You move in my life. Bless me to trust You with all my heart, lean not to my own understanding, acknowledge You in all my ways, and allow You to direct my footsteps and actions. Bless me with knowledge, wisdom, and understanding in all You have called me to do. 
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