Silas
Beloved of All
Your honest prayer shows both deep pain and a sincere desire to honor God in your marriage, and God sees that. He established marriage as a lifelong covenant between one man and one woman, and He calls both husband and wife to faithfulness within it. It is right to bring your husband, your marriage, and that other relationship before the Lord and ask Him to work.
I will pray with you that God will convict your husband's heart, break the hold of any relationship outside your covenant, and draw him to repentance and to return home. Pray too that the Lord will restore a desire for you that belongs within marriage alone, and that any tie that does not belong there would be ended. Only God can change a heart, but He is able to open eyes, turn a person from darkness to light, and lead him toward what is right.
You also asked for open communication. The Scriptures show how God spoke with Moses as a friend speaks with a friend, in a real dialogue where both speak and are heard. That kind of honest, clear exchange is what God desires for a husband and wife as well. Ask the Lord to soften both of your hearts so that you can speak truthfully and listen graciously, without anger or hidden bitterness blocking the way. Pray that He will give you both words that are kind and ears that are willing to hear.
You asked for help to be obedient and kind and forgiving. That request is very close to the heart of what Jesus taught. Forgiveness is not a matter of keeping count, as if you could forgive seven times or even seventy times seven and then be finished. It is a matter of the spirit, an attitude of the heart. If you try to count that far you will lose count, and that is the point. Love is long suffering and kind, and it does not keep a record of wrongs to use later.
True forgiveness is also from the heart and it is complete. To say I forgive you but I will never forget is not real forgiveness. It is like burying the hatchet but leaving the handle sticking up so you can find it again. We often forgive that way, but God does not. When God forgives through Jesus Christ, His forgiveness is total. He washes and cleanses, He does not bring the sin up again, He treats you as though you had never done it. He calls you justified. Because we have received that kind of mercy, we are called to follow His example and walk in love as Christ loved us and gave Himself for us.
Jesus made this very practical when He taught His disciples to pray, forgive us as we forgive others, and then He stressed that if we will not forgive others, we close the door in our own hearts to fully receiving the Father's forgiveness. Holding on to bitterness and resentment does not only hurt the marriage, it harms you spiritually and emotionally.
You cannot create this kind of forgiveness on your own, and God does not expect you to. He commands it and then He gives the ability when you are willing. So the prayer becomes, Lord, give me a willing heart. Take away the bitterness and give me Your spirit of forgiveness. If you are willing, He will help you to forgive from the heart, not just with words, and to extend the same complete, forgetting kind of grace that He has shown you.
May the Lord help you to remain obedient to His word, to respond with kindness even when it is difficult, and to keep a forgiving spirit day by day. That does not mean pretending the hurt is not real or that trust is instantly restored. It means choosing, with God's help, not to hold the offense against your husband in a way that poisons your heart, while still trusting God to bring conviction, healing, and right order to your home.
Let us pray. Father, in the name of Jesus we bring this marriage before You. You see the hurt, the separation, and the temptation that has come between this husband and wife. We ask You to convict of sin, to break every tie that does not belong in this covenant, and to turn this husband's heart toward You and toward his wife. Restore open and honest communication between them. Give this wife a willing heart, fill her with Your spirit of forgiveness, take away bitterness, and help her to walk in obedience and kindness and a love that is patient. Wash both of them with Your forgiveness and cleansing as they turn to You, and bring healing according to Your will. Amen.
I will pray with you that God will convict your husband's heart, break the hold of any relationship outside your covenant, and draw him to repentance and to return home. Pray too that the Lord will restore a desire for you that belongs within marriage alone, and that any tie that does not belong there would be ended. Only God can change a heart, but He is able to open eyes, turn a person from darkness to light, and lead him toward what is right.
You also asked for open communication. The Scriptures show how God spoke with Moses as a friend speaks with a friend, in a real dialogue where both speak and are heard. That kind of honest, clear exchange is what God desires for a husband and wife as well. Ask the Lord to soften both of your hearts so that you can speak truthfully and listen graciously, without anger or hidden bitterness blocking the way. Pray that He will give you both words that are kind and ears that are willing to hear.
You asked for help to be obedient and kind and forgiving. That request is very close to the heart of what Jesus taught. Forgiveness is not a matter of keeping count, as if you could forgive seven times or even seventy times seven and then be finished. It is a matter of the spirit, an attitude of the heart. If you try to count that far you will lose count, and that is the point. Love is long suffering and kind, and it does not keep a record of wrongs to use later.
True forgiveness is also from the heart and it is complete. To say I forgive you but I will never forget is not real forgiveness. It is like burying the hatchet but leaving the handle sticking up so you can find it again. We often forgive that way, but God does not. When God forgives through Jesus Christ, His forgiveness is total. He washes and cleanses, He does not bring the sin up again, He treats you as though you had never done it. He calls you justified. Because we have received that kind of mercy, we are called to follow His example and walk in love as Christ loved us and gave Himself for us.
Jesus made this very practical when He taught His disciples to pray, forgive us as we forgive others, and then He stressed that if we will not forgive others, we close the door in our own hearts to fully receiving the Father's forgiveness. Holding on to bitterness and resentment does not only hurt the marriage, it harms you spiritually and emotionally.
You cannot create this kind of forgiveness on your own, and God does not expect you to. He commands it and then He gives the ability when you are willing. So the prayer becomes, Lord, give me a willing heart. Take away the bitterness and give me Your spirit of forgiveness. If you are willing, He will help you to forgive from the heart, not just with words, and to extend the same complete, forgetting kind of grace that He has shown you.
May the Lord help you to remain obedient to His word, to respond with kindness even when it is difficult, and to keep a forgiving spirit day by day. That does not mean pretending the hurt is not real or that trust is instantly restored. It means choosing, with God's help, not to hold the offense against your husband in a way that poisons your heart, while still trusting God to bring conviction, healing, and right order to your home.
Let us pray. Father, in the name of Jesus we bring this marriage before You. You see the hurt, the separation, and the temptation that has come between this husband and wife. We ask You to convict of sin, to break every tie that does not belong in this covenant, and to turn this husband's heart toward You and toward his wife. Restore open and honest communication between them. Give this wife a willing heart, fill her with Your spirit of forgiveness, take away bitterness, and help her to walk in obedience and kindness and a love that is patient. Wash both of them with Your forgiveness and cleansing as they turn to You, and bring healing according to Your will. Amen.
