We hear your heart, brother, and we lift you up before the Lord with great compassion. The pain of loss—especially the fracturing of a marriage and family—is deep, and the weight of lingering feelings can feel unbearable. But we stand with you in the truth that God is near to the brokenhearted (Psalm 34:18) and that He is able to restore what has been broken, whether that be your heart, your family, or your future.
First, we must address the reality of your situation with honesty and love. Divorce is a grievous wound, and Scripture makes it clear that God hates it (Malachi 2:16). Yet we also know that He is a God of redemption, and He can bring beauty from ashes (Isaiah 61:3). Your battle with alcoholism is not something to be taken lightly—it is a snare that can destroy lives, families, and futures. We encourage you to seek accountability, counseling, and support through a Christ-centered recovery program. The enemy would love to keep you bound, but Jesus came to set the captives free (Luke 4:18). Confess this struggle to the Lord and to trusted believers who can walk with you in victory.
Now, regarding your feelings for your ex-wife and her new relationship, we must speak truth in love. It is natural to long for reconciliation, especially when children are involved, but we must surrender this desire to the Lord and ask Him to align your heart with His will. Reconciliation is only possible if it is God’s plan—and if it is, He will make a way. But if her heart is hardened or if she has moved on in a way that dishonors God, we must trust that He has something better for you. For now, we rebuke the spirit of bitterness, jealousy, and unforgiveness that may be trying to take root in your heart. The Word commands us to forgive as we have been forgiven (Colossians 3:13) and to bless those who may have wronged us (Romans 12:14). This does not mean what happened was right, but it means we release the offense to God and choose to walk in freedom.
We also must address the reality of her new relationship. If she is in an unbiblical union—whether that be with someone who is not a believer, or if she has remarried without biblical grounds—we must pray for her to come to repentance and for God to intervene. But if she is in a relationship that is honoring to God, then we must ask the Lord to help you release her fully into His hands. Your peace cannot be dependent on her choices. True joy comes from Christ alone (Nehemiah 8:10), and He is more than able to fill the void in your heart.
Let us pray for you now:
Heavenly Father, we come before You on behalf of our brother who is carrying the weight of a broken marriage, the struggle of addiction, and the pain of unrequited feelings. Lord, You see his heart, and You know the depths of his sorrow. We ask that You would draw near to him, comfort him, and remind him that he is not alone. Father, we pray for his healing—emotionally, spiritually, and physically. Break the chains of alcoholism in his life, and replace his dependence on substances with a dependence on You. Surround him with godly men who can walk with him in accountability and truth.
Lord, we lift up his ex-wife to You. If it is Your will for reconciliation, we ask that You soften her heart and open her eyes to the possibility of restoration. But if it is not Your plan, we ask that You help our brother release her fully into Your hands. Remove any bitterness, jealousy, or unforgiveness from his heart, and replace it with Your peace. Help him to genuinely wish her well, not out of obligation, but out of a heart that trusts You with his future.
Father, we also pray for his children. May they see their father walking in faith, relying on You, and modeling a life of repentance and redemption. Protect their hearts from the wounds of divorce, and let them know that You are their ultimate Father who will never leave them nor forsake them.
Lord, we ask that You would begin to rebuild what has been broken. Open doors for our brother to find a godly wife—one who will encourage him in his faith, support him in his recovery, and love his children as her own. Prepare his heart to receive love again, and help him to trust that You have good plans for his future (Jeremiah 29:11).
Finally, Father, we pray that our brother would fix his eyes on Jesus—the Author and Perfecter of his faith (Hebrews 12:2). May he find his identity in You, not in his past failures or his present struggles. Fill him with Your Holy Spirit, and let him walk in the freedom that only You can provide. We ask all of this in the mighty name of Jesus, for it is only through Him that we have access to You. Amen.
Brother, we want to encourage you with this truth: God is not done with you. Your story is not over, and your best days can still be ahead. But you must choose to walk in obedience, one day at a time. Seek the Lord with all your heart, and He will direct your paths (Proverbs 3:5-6). Surround yourself with believers who will speak life into you, hold you accountable, and remind you of God’s promises. And remember, your worth is not found in your past or in your relationship status—it is found in Christ alone.
If you have not already, we strongly encourage you to get involved in a local church where you can find support, discipleship, and community. You do not have to walk this road alone. And if you have not fully surrendered your life to Jesus, we urge you to do so today. The Bible tells us that if we confess with our mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in our heart that God raised Him from the dead, we will be saved (Romans 10:9). There is no greater hope, no greater peace, and no greater purpose than knowing Christ and being known by Him.
You are loved, you are valued, and you are not forgotten. Keep pressing into the Lord, and He will lead you to still waters and green pastures (Psalm 23:2).
