We hear your heart, dear sister, and we stand with you in prayer as you navigate this struggle with trust in your courtship. First, we want to affirm your desire to align your thoughts with God’s truth—this is a beautiful act of faith, and we praise the Lord for your willingness to surrender this burden to Him. The pain of betrayal is deep, and it is understandable that it has left scars on your heart. Yet we must also gently address the nature of your relationship, for Scripture is clear about the purpose and boundaries of courtship.
You mention that you have a boyfriend, but we must encourage you both to consider whether this relationship is moving toward the holy covenant of marriage, as God designed. Courtship is not merely a season of companionship but a time of discernment, preparation, and intentional pursuit of a godly spouse. If this relationship is not firmly rooted in the commitment to marry—with purity, accountability, and a shared devotion to Christ—then it may be wise to step back and seek the Lord’s guidance on whether this is His will for you both. "Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers, for what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?" (2 Corinthians 6:14). If your boyfriend is not a believer, or if he is not pursuing holiness alongside you, this could be a source of ongoing struggle.
Now, regarding trust: the enemy would love nothing more than to keep you bound in fear and suspicion, for it robs you of the peace and joy that Christ died to give you. The fact that your boyfriend lied once does not mean he is lying now, but we must also acknowledge that sin has consequences. Proverbs 28:13 tells us, "He who conceals his sins doesn’t prosper, but whoever confesses and renounces them finds mercy." Has he repented before God and before you? Has he demonstrated a pattern of honesty and transparency since that failure? If not, this may be an opportunity for godly confrontation and accountability. If he has, then your struggle is not with him but with the lingering effects of that wound—and that is where the Lord’s healing must come in.
We must also address the spiritual aspect of this battle. The enemy thrives on division, doubt, and strife in relationships. He whispers lies to make you question your boyfriend’s integrity, just as he did with Eve in the Garden. But we have the authority in Christ to rebuke those lies and stand on God’s truth. "For though we walk in the flesh, we don’t wage war according to the flesh; for the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh, but mighty before God to the throwing down of strongholds, throwing down imaginations and every high thing that is exalted against the knowledge of God, and bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ" (2 Corinthians 10:3-5). Every time a thought of suspicion arises, you must take it captive and replace it with Scripture. "Love believes all things, hopes all things" (1 Corinthians 13:7). This does not mean being naive, but it does mean choosing to extend grace when there is no evidence of deceit.
We also encourage you to examine your own heart. Are you holding onto this hurt as a form of self-protection? Are you allowing bitterness to take root? Hebrews 12:15 warns, "Looking carefully lest there be any man who falls short of the grace of God; lest any root of bitterness springing up trouble you, and many be defiled by it." Forgiveness does not mean excusing his sin, but it does mean releasing the debt to God and choosing to walk in freedom. If he has repented, have you truly forgiven him? If not, this could be hindering your ability to trust.
Let us pray for you now:
Heavenly Father, we come before You in the mighty name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior. We lift up this dear sister to You, knowing that You see the depths of her heart and the struggles she faces. Lord, You are the God of all comfort, and we ask that You would heal the wounds of betrayal in her life. Where there is fear, replace it with Your perfect love, which casts out all fear (1 John 4:18). Where there is suspicion, replace it with the peace that surpasses all understanding (Philippians 4:7).
Father, we ask that You would give her discernment to know whether this relationship is honoring to You. If it is Your will for her to move forward toward marriage with this man, then we pray that You would knit their hearts together in trust and transparency. Convict him of any areas where he is not walking in integrity, and give him the strength to repent and change. If this relationship is not of You, then we ask that You would make that clear to her and give her the courage to walk away.
Lord, we rebuke the spirit of distrust and division that has taken root in her mind. We declare that every lie from the enemy is broken in the name of Jesus. We speak truth over her: she is a daughter of the King, redeemed by the blood of Christ, and called to walk in freedom. Help her to take every thought captive and to replace every lie with Your Word. Teach her to love as You love—with patience, kindness, and a heart that believes the best.
Father, we also ask that You would guard her heart from bitterness. Where there is unforgiveness, soften her heart to release it to You. Where there is pain, bring healing and restoration. Surround her with godly counsel and community who will speak truth into her life and hold her accountable.
Above all, Lord, we pray that You would be glorified in this situation. Whether this relationship continues or comes to an end, we ask that You would use it to draw her closer to You. May she find her identity, security, and worth in You alone, and may she trust in Your perfect plan for her life.
We ask all of this in the powerful, matchless name of Jesus Christ, the name above every name, the name by which we are saved and through which we have access to the Father. Amen.
In closing, we encourage you to seek wise, biblical counsel from a pastor or trusted Christian mentor. Share your struggles with them, and allow them to speak truth into your life. Surround yourself with believers who will pray for you and hold you accountable. And remember, dear sister, that your ultimate trust must be in the Lord, not in any man. "Trust in Yahweh with all your heart, and don’t lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight" (Proverbs 3:5-6). He is faithful, and He will never leave you nor forsake you.