We have heard your cry and we are lifting you before the throne of grace together, for your life feels overwhelming and broken in many areas at once and we do not take that lightly.
We want to gently but truthfully address what you have shared about struggling with porn. This is sin before God, for Jesus said everyone who gazes at a woman to lust after her has committed adultery with her already in his heart in Matthew 5:28, and we are commanded to flee sexual immorality in 1 Corinthians 6:18. Every other sin that a man does is outside the body, but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body. Porn defiles the heart, hardens the conscience, and keeps you feeling far from God and spiritually down. We urge you to repent and turn from it completely, to confess it openly to God who promises if we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous to forgive us the sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness in 1 John 1:9, and to put practical guards in place, cutting off access, bringing it into the light with a trusted mature Christian brother or pastor, and pursuing purity. God can create in you a clean heart and renew a right spirit within you as in Psalm 51:10, but this requires a decisive break and walking in the Spirit.
We also hear how worthless you feel because you are not married and do not have children, and how your heart screams for children and you feel God does not care. We want to rebuke that lie with truth. Your worth is not measured by marriage or children, though both are beautiful gifts. You are fearfully and wonderfully made in Psalm 139:14, created in God's image in Genesis 1:27, and you are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works in Ephesians 2:10. Children are indeed a heritage of the Lord in Psalm 127:3, and marriage between a man and a woman is God's good design for a lifelong commitment, and we will pray that if it is His will He brings you a godly spouse in His timing, a marriage that honors Him where courtship is pursued with the goal of marriage to another Christian believer and kept pure, for sex before or outside marriage is fornication and dishonors God. But whether single or married, with or without children, you are fully seen, known, and loved by God, and your life has deep purpose in Him right now.
We hear your pain about having no job and needing constant income, and about the heart you had to go to Israel and do archaeology and how that was destroyed and the difficulty with your brother that cost you that opportunity and income. God sees that disappointment and loss. We are called to forgive as God in Christ forgave us in Ephesians 4:32, and to trust that even when people fail us or doors close, God is still sovereign and has plans for you. For we know the thoughts that He thinks toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you hope and a future in Jeremiah 29:11. He promises to supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus in Philippians 4:19, and to seek first God's Kingdom and his righteousness and all these things will be given to you as well in Matthew 6:33. We pray for open doors for honest work and provision, and for healing between you and your brother.
You have said many times that you feel so far from God and spiritually such a mess and that God does not care. That feeling is real but it is not the truth. The Lord is near to those who are brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit in Psalm 34:18, and we are told to cast all your worries on him, because he cares for you in 1 Peter 5:7. Nothing can separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord in Romans 8:38-39. If you feel far, God says draw near to God, and he will draw near to you in James 4:8. He has not abandoned you. He invites you to come near through Jesus.
We noticed you speak often of God but you did not mention the name of Jesus Christ, and we must speak to this because it is central. It is only through Jesus that we have access to the Father, for Jesus said I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me in John 14:6, and there is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven that is given among men by which we must be saved in Acts 4:12. If you have not yet put your trust in Jesus, who died for your sins and rose again, we urge you to call on Him today, for if you will confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved in Romans 10:9. It is in His name we pray and find breakthrough, peace, and cleansing.
So together we pray for you now.
Father in heaven, we lift this dear one to You together in the name of Jesus Christ. You see the mess, the unemployment, the financial pressure, the spiritual heaviness, the battle with lust, the ache for marriage and children, the shattered dream concerning Israel and archaeology, and the wound with his brother. Lord have mercy and bring breakthrough. Forgive sin, cleanse the heart, break the chains of pornography and set him free to walk in purity and holiness. Let him know how deeply You care and how near You are to the brokenhearted. Remind him that his value is in being Your child, not in his marital status. Provide for his daily needs, open doors for steady and dignified work, and guide his steps. Heal the hurt over lost opportunities and bring reconciliation and forgiveness where there is division. Draw him close when he feels far, renew his spirit, and let him know Your love that never fails. We ask that You lead him to a godly marriage if it is Your will, a union that honors You, and help him to pursue courtship in purity and faith. We pray for hope to replace despair and for faith to rise, that he would trust that You do care and You are working for good. We ask all this in the mighty name of Jesus Christ, our only hope and Savior, amen.
We encourage you to stay in the Word daily, even when you feel dry, to pray honestly, to fellowship with a Bible believing church, to seek accountability for purity, and to keep bringing your needs to God, for He hears. Do not give up, for God is not finished with your story and He can bring beauty from ashes as you walk near to Him in Isaiah 41:10, do not be afraid, for I am with you. Do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you. Yes, I will help you. Yes, I will uphold you with the right hand of my righteousness.
