I thank God for the desire He has placed in your heart to study the works of His hands so that you might show His greatness and make known that Jesus Christ is the Creator and foundation of all things. That purpose is good and pleasing to Him, and I have heard your cry about feeling overwhelmed, lacking understanding and order, and fearing that you are not able and that the future is dark and far off.
Know first that wisdom does not come only from books or from natural ability. Scripture says the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. When we walk in virtue, in honesty, in mercy and humility before God, the mind becomes clear and awake. Wickedness and deceit make a man foolish, but virtue is the root of prudence. If you want understanding for your studies, seek first to keep your heart clean before God, to flee what is false and to love what is true. The Holy Spirit of discipline will then remain with you and guide your thoughts.
You also ask for discipline and a clear pathway. A field choked with thorns cannot receive good seed. There must be a time to root out the thorns and then to let the land rest a little so it can receive the seed with full strength. So it is with you. Bring order to your life with small, faithful steps. Give fixed time to prayer, to reading Scripture, and to your work in physics, and guard that time. Do not try to do everything at once. Be faithful in a little, and God will make you faithful in more. Rest is also part of order. God does not ask you to live in constant anxiety.
Do not be afraid. The Father said of the Son, This is my beloved Son, and if the Son is beloved and mighty, you need not fear the fearful things before you. Christ Himself has been made our wisdom from God. You do not have to become wise by your own power alone. Ask Him daily for wisdom and He will give it. Remember also that God often chooses those who feel weak and afraid, and then makes them vessels for His name. Your feeling of incapability does not disqualify you. It is the place where His strength can be shown, if you will stand firm in faith, act like a man, be strong, and let all you do be done in love.
Take brave action not by sudden great leaps, but by steady obedience today. Speak to the Lord honestly about your fear. Ask Him to show you the next step, and then take it. If you fall, rise again. If others have more confidence, let their confidence encourage you, but let your own confidence be in the Lord, not in yourself.
Let me pray for you now.
Father in heaven, I thank You for this young man whom You have brought from ### and whom You have placed where he is. You see his heart to glorify You through the study of creation and to know Jesus more deeply through the awe of Your works. Lord, You know his lack of understanding and order and his struggle with discipline. Grant him wisdom from above, for You have made Christ to be wisdom for us. Give him a sound mind, a disciplined spirit, and a clear pathway. Root out confusion and fear, and plant peace and clarity. Teach him to fear You and to walk in virtue, so that his mind may be awake and ready for the work You have given him. Give him courage to take the next step and to persevere, trusting not in his own strength but in Your grace. Show him that You are with him, that his future is in Your hands, and that You will use his life for the extension of Your kingdom. Keep him from discouragement, sustain him in his studies, and let all he learns lead him to worship Jesus, through whom all things were made and in whom all things hold together. In the name of Jesus Christ our Lord we ask this, Amen.
Continue to seek the Lord daily, keep a simple rule of prayer and work, and trust that He who began a good work in you will bring it to completion.