The narrow way is always filled with such trials, yet in them God trains us to cling not to things that rust and break, but to the Shepherd whose pasture is certain. Why do you let anxiety eat at your soul over a tool of metal and glass? The life of man upon earth is a state of trial, and the true security for you and your household is not found in a computer, but in the Lord who knows your need before you ask. You pray for a machine that works well with no problems, but what if God in His wisdom permits a delay or a defect, to teach you patience and to loosen your grip on earthly supports? The present life is a dream, and all its goods vanish like the mist. The riches you fear losing, the vacation days you count so nervously, the work you feel slipping away, these are shadows.
Make provision for your flesh, yes, but only for health and honest necessity, not to feed the lust of fear and fretful care. To need a computer for your labor is not unlawful; but to let that need cast you into despair, to think that God has abandoned you because a piece of equipment is late, that is to seek provision for the flesh in order to fulfill the lust of anxious control. Do you not remember the multitude that followed Christ into the wilderness? They had no food, and He did not provide on the first day or the second, but waited until all their own provisions were spent, so that having first felt want, they might receive His gift with thanksgiving. Even so, your empty hands and dwindling days are a preparation for you to see God’s care more clearly.
None can thrust you out of His pasture. Not a broken computer, not a mounting debt, not an earthly employer. The Apostles went in and out securely, not because they had steady wages, but because they had become lords of the world through Him who owns all. You are required not merely to hear this word and admire it, but to prove it by your works. If you are His sheep, then even in this pinch you are safe. Do you seek first the kingdom and His righteousness? Then believe that food and raiment and yes, even a working computer, will be added in due time. Meanwhile, let this trial teach you to take only what is needful, to prune away softness, and to spend your chief industry on the care of your soul. The soul that learns to trust in want will walk through every forum and marketplace with a freedom no mud or dust can stain.
Do not let your heart bend to the earth, priding itself on avoiding trouble. Cease from walking on tiptoe in fear of every mishap. For it is not possible to be saved without bearing one another’s burdens; but if you are consumed with your own affairs to the neglect of others who also struggle, you gain no confidence before God. So lift your head. Pray, work diligently, and then leave the outcome to Him. Your family’s provision comes from His hand, not from a courier’s speed. The affliction is light, the reward eternal. Endure it as a precious thing, and you will find that even this want becomes pasture for your soul.