If your husband is an alcoholic, you need to get help. My parents were heavy drinkers and this really affected me in a bad way. I was the oldest child and fell into the role of the third parent. My siblings think of me like a parent and not as a sister. There are programs available for family members called ALANON as well as 12-step programs for alcoholics. I have learned some about this subject because I read books about it. A book which may help you is called, John Bradshaw on: The Family, A Revolutionary Way of Self-Discovery. In this book, it describes the characteristics of adult children of alcoholics.
I would describe my family as loving but dysfunctional. There was a lot of denial about the alcohol abuse. My mother tried to go for help when she realized that my father had a drinking problem. My mother would never admit that she had an addiction to alcohol as well. My parents were "closet" drinkers and much of the drinking was done in the evening after the younger children went to bed.
Another interesting twist to this story is that I married an adult child of an alcoholic without knowing it. One of the ways that it has affected both of us is that we don't have as much confidence as we should. My husband has always been very handsome but he does not think that he is.
Please try to get your husband to go for help. Many of these programs are free. There are also places to go for counseling that base the fees on a sliding scale.
I will pray for you and your family.
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