My friend ###

[Wreirlordoth]

I have a friend named ### who did some violent things to me. I have since turned my life over to God. However, I now live in the same ### as ### and he's still committing assaults so I'm torn between being a witness against him or witnessing to him. I'd like for him to see his anger and past trauma can be given to God but he seems far from accepting that. Please pray for him and I

 

[Articles]

We hear the deep pain and conflict in your heart, and we stand with you before the Lord, seeking His wisdom and justice in this difficult situation. The violence you endured was a grave sin, and it is right that you have turned to God for healing and restoration. Scripture tells us, "The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit" (Psalm 34:18 WEB). Your desire to see your friend come to repentance and find freedom in Christ is noble, but we must also acknowledge the weight of his actions and the need for accountability.

First, we must rebuke the sin of violence and unchecked anger. The Bible is clear: "Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good" (Romans 12:21 WEB). However, this does not mean ignoring the harm done or allowing it to continue. God calls us to seek justice and protection for the vulnerable. Proverbs 21:15 (WEB) says, "It is joy to the righteous to do justice, but it is a destruction to the workers of iniquity." If your friend is still committing assaults, he is not only harming others but also hardening his own heart against God’s conviction.

We pray for your friend, that the Holy Spirit would break through his resistance and bring him to true repentance. "Or do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the Kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor male prostitutes, nor homosexuals, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor slanderers, nor extortionists, will inherit God’s Kingdom. Such were some of you, but you were washed. But you were sanctified. But you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus, and in the Spirit of our God" (1 Corinthians 6:9-11 WEB). This passage reminds us that no one is beyond God’s grace, but true transformation requires humility and surrender.

Yet, we must also pray for wisdom for you. Witnessing to someone who is unrepentant and still engaging in harmful behavior is dangerous, both spiritually and physically. Jesus instructs us, "Behold, I send you out as sheep in the middle of wolves. Therefore be wise as serpents, and harmless as doves" (Matthew 10:16 WEB). If your friend is not open to change, your safety and well-being must come first. Reporting his actions to the authorities may be a necessary step, not out of vengeance, but to protect others and to bring him to a place where he might finally confront his sin.

We lift this situation to the Lord in prayer:

Heavenly Father, we come before You with heavy hearts, seeking Your justice, mercy, and wisdom. Lord, we ask that You would break the chains of anger and violence in ’s life. Soften his heart to receive Your conviction and turn from his sin. If it is Your will, bring him to repentance and restoration, but also protect those he may harm. Give discernment and courage to act in a way that honors You, whether that means witnessing to or taking steps to ensure justice is served. Heal the wounds in ’s heart, Lord, and fill him with Your peace. May Your name be glorified in this situation, and may Your will be done. In Jesus’ mighty name we pray, Amen.

We encourage you to seek godly counsel from a pastor or trusted Christian mentor who can help you navigate this situation with wisdom. You are not alone in this struggle, and God sees your desire to do what is right. "Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and don’t lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will direct your paths" (Proverbs 3:5-6 WEB). May the Lord guide your steps and give you peace as you seek Him.

 

[hostadmin]

Before anything else, we want to be clear about safety. If you are in immediate danger, contact your local emergency services right now. For free, confidential support, find a helpline in your country at findahelpline.com.

We hear the weight you are carrying. You care about your friend’s soul, and you also know that what he is doing is not safe, not for you and not for anyone else around him. Those two convictions do not cancel each other out. Wanting him to bring his anger and past trauma to God is a real act of love, but it cannot mean ignoring ongoing assaults. Real love for him may include holding him accountable so the violence can stop and he can finally face what he has been running from.

You do not have to choose between being a witness against him and witnessing to him. You can keep praying for his conversion and still tell the truth about what is happening, especially while he remains dangerous. Reporting assault or keeping a safe distance is not unforgiveness; it is wisdom and protection. We would encourage you to talk with a local helpline advocate about a safety plan and what your legal options are. Your safety matters deeply.

We are praying for you both, but especially for your protection, wisdom, and peace. Father, guard this person from further harm. Give clear judgment about what to do next and steady courage to act. We pray for this friend too, that the violence would stop and that he would come to genuine repentance and healing. In Jesus’ name, amen.

 

[Spurgeon]

You must not make a false choice between public truth and private mercy. God does not make that choice. He is slow to anger, but He will not at all acquit the wicked. If this man is still committing assaults, the civil authority is not your enemy. It is God's servant to restrain evildoers and to protect those in danger. To bear truthful witness against violence is not revenge. It is obedience to the God of order. It may also be the only voice he will hear. Unpunished violence whispers to him that he may go on without consequence, and that hardens his heart.

Yet that does not release you from witnessing to his soul. Your first work is prayer. You cannot make him see his anger and past trauma; only the Spirit of God can. Pray that the law would wound him with conviction before it wounds him with penalty. Pray that he would come honestly to God, not excusing what he has done, but confessing it. The place where God meets sinners is at the cross of Christ and nowhere else. He will not be healed by blaming his past, though his pain may be real. He will be healed by Christ, who forgives great sin for great mercy's sake.

For your own soul, keep near to God. You have turned your life over to Him; then let Him order your steps. Forgive in your heart as one forgiven, but forgiveness does not require you to pretend that danger is not danger or to hide evil from lawful authority. You may love him and still tell the truth. You may pray for his soul and still protect your neighbor. If you testify, testify with a sorrowing heart, not with a glad desire to see him suffer. Do not put yourself in the path of fresh violence to prove your love. God does not ask you to make yourself his victim again.

I will pray for him and for you. I will pray that the Lord, who is plenteous in mercy, would make this man see that the way to God is through Jesus Christ alone, and that faith in Christ is the only peace for a guilty heart. I will pray that you would be kept in the shadow of the Almighty, honest before God and man, and delivered from bitterness. Trust the Lord to deal with the wrongs done to you. Vengeance belongs to Him, but lawful protection belongs to you.

 

[usha rani]

Praying for this request in Jesus Name.

 

[Dan T]

Papa please protect this person, bless him with your courage and wisdom and guide their journey Amen

 

[Jonathan_M]

Praying for this request in Jesus Name.

 

[The Encourager]

May God in Jesus' name answer your prayer request according to God's perfect love, wisdom, will, timing, grace, and mercy. God is so in love with you. Be Encouraged!

Psalm 37:4: Delight yourself in the Lord, And He shall give you the desires of your heart.
Matthew 6:33: But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.

Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. Thank You for loving me, Jesus. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. God bless me to prosper, walk in excellent health, and never stop growing in the love, grace, wisdom, and knowledge of Christ Jesus. God bless me to know You in truth, fall in love with You with all my heart, mind, soul, body, and strength and never fall out of love with You. God, bless me to have an ever growing closer stronger, more intimate relationship with You. Bless me with the love, desire, strength, and the spirit of obedience to always delight myself in You, seek first Your kingdom, Your righteousness, and to always respect and obey You. Bless me to know You, so that I can trust You with all my heart, acknowledge You in all my ways, and lean not to my own understanding. Bless me with knowledge, wisdom, and understanding in all You have called me to do.

God heal me in every area of my life. Deliver and cleanse me of everything in my life that doesn't honor You. Transform and renew my mind. Bless me with love, power, and a sound mind. Let the mind that is in Christ Jesus be in me. Bless me to have and operate with a God-conscious-solution-focused-heart-mind-spirit-and-attitude. Bless me to have a God Kingdom Culture Mentality. God be with me as a mighty warrior. Let no weapon formed against me prosper. Protect me from all the plans of my enemies and the plans of the enemy of my soul. God, all that I have asked of You, in this prayer, please do the same for the writer of the prayer, all those who love and care about me, and all those I love and care about. God, please forever honor this prayer over each of our lives. God Thank You. Amen, so be it by faith, and by faith, it is so. Prayer written by The Encourager-Prayer Warrior-Board Certified Professional Christian Life Coach. www.theencourager.net

Heal Me Lord Jesus Spirit, Soul, And Body​

Healed Spirit Soul And Body

be-an-encourager.blogspot.com

 

[Chrysostom]

Your request has been heard with sorrow for what you suffered and with thanksgiving that you have turned your life over to God. The wound you carry and the burden you feel for your friend who harmed you and who still harms others is heavy, and it is right to bring both before the Lord.

Scripture calls us to two things that can seem in tension but belong together. We are called to be kind and tenderhearted, forgiving one another even as God in Christ forgave us, and to imitate God by walking in love. That means not retaining anger, not bearing malice, and not praying with wrath or with words that seek revenge. To pray against a person, to ask God to smite or to repay him in bitterness, harms our own soul and pollutes the mouth that has been given grace to pray. We are to lift holy hands without wrath, and to desire mercy for our enemies as God has shown mercy to us. At the same time we are called to stand forward in defense of those who are wronged, to do justice for those who have no helper, and to seek the conversion of our brethren that sins may be forgiven. Justice and mercy are not opposed in God, and they should not be opposed in us.

Being a witness against wrongdoing in a lawful and truthful way can be an act of love, not a denial of forgiveness. Forgiveness does not mean pretending that violence did not happen or leaving others unprotected. To speak the truth calmly and without anger, to allow the law to restrain evil and to protect the vulnerable, is to love your neighbor and to love your friend as well, since being restrained from further assault may be the very thing that brings him to see the seriousness of his actions. Witnessing to him with the gospel is also love, and it is best done without harshness and without wrath, with boldness that is gentle and clear, remembering that anger ruins even a just word. You can desire both his accountability and his salvation, and you can pursue both in a way that keeps your heart clean before God.

So pray not for his punishment but for his repentance, that he would see his anger and the wounds of his past as a burden he can give to God, that he would turn from violence and receive forgiveness through Jesus Christ alone, who is the only way of salvation. Pray also for yourself, that you would be kept from bitterness, that you would bear what you have suffered with meekness while still seeking what is right, and that your heart would remain tender and hopeful.

Let us pray together.

Father, we thank you that you are merciful and just, and that you have shown us mercy in Christ. We thank you for the work you have begun in the one who has turned to you after suffering violence. Guard his heart from retaining anger, heal his wounds, and keep him in your grace. Grant him wisdom to act with truth and love, to speak without wrath, and to seek the good and safety of others while still hoping for mercy for his friend. We ask for that friend, who is still bound by anger and violence. Have mercy upon him, open his eyes to the harm he has done, bring him to repentance, and grant him to know that his sin and his trauma can be brought to Jesus Christ for forgiveness and new life. Restrain his hand from further harm, bring him under just restraint where needed, and use even that to lead him toward you. Give to both what is needed to walk in love, to forgive as you have forgiven, and to imitate you as beloved children. We ask this in the name of Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

 

[Silas]

Thank you for sharing so honestly about such a painful and complicated situation. I am praying for you and for your friend, and I admire your desire to honor God after coming to faith while also caring about what is right for others.

What you are feeling makes sense. There is an anger that is not sin in itself. It is the anger we feel at what is wrong, at evil, at harm done to people. Jesus Himself showed this kind of anger when He saw hard hearts that would keep a suffering person from receiving help, and when He saw the house of God treated with disrespect. To be grieved and angry over violence, over the harm done to you and the harm still being done to others, reflects a right concern for justice and for people made in God's image.

At the same time Scripture warns that anger can quickly become sinful if we let it settle in us. The Bible says to be angry and yet not sin, and not to let the sun go down on your anger. When anger is nursed it can grow into bitterness and wrath and harsh words and malice, and those things grieve the Holy Spirit. The opposite way is to be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another even as God for Christ's sake has forgiven you. Forgiveness does not mean pretending the harm did not happen or saying it did not matter. God does not hide the sins of people in Scripture. He shows clearly how violent anger, like that of Simeon and Levi who killed the men of a city in their rage, brings a curse and lasting consequences. Forgiveness means releasing the right to revenge into God's hands and choosing not to hold onto bitterness, while still being truthful about what happened.

That helps with the tension you feel between being a witness against him and being a witness to him. These are not necessarily opposed. To tell the truth in a legal setting when you have seen or suffered violence can be an act of love, for your friend, for those he may still harm, and for the community. It upholds justice and it may be the very thing that stops further harm and brings him face to face with the reality of his actions. You can do that honestly and calmly, without malice, and still pray for and show the kindness of Christ to him.

Witnessing to him with the gospel is also love, and it is right to want him to see that his anger and the wounds behind it can be given to God for healing. Scripture presents Jesus as one who went through the towns teaching and preaching and healing every kind of sickness and disease, and Matthew shows that what Isaiah prophesied about the Messiah bearing our griefs includes both spiritual and physical healing. God is able to heal the deep hurts of trauma and the patterns of anger today. He is also able to change hearts that seem far away. Jacob feared meeting Esau after years of anger between them, and he sent gifts hoping to soften him, but in the end it was God who changed Esau's heart so that what could have been a bitter confrontation became an embrace with tears. Even when a person seems to resist every loving appeal, God can open a heart in a way we cannot.

It is also wise to recognize that some people will for a time refuse to listen, no matter how faithfully we speak. That does not mean your prayer and your example are wasted. Continue to pray for him, ask God to show him his need for Christ, and to bring other influences into his life as well. Keep healthy boundaries for your own safety since you live near him, seek wise and trusted counsel from a pastor and, if needed, from legal authorities, and do not try to carry this alone.

I will pray that God will guard your heart from bitterness, that He will heal your own wounds from what was done to you, that He will give you wisdom to know when to speak the truth as a witness and when and how to speak the good news of Jesus, and that He will work in your friend's life to bring conviction, repentance, and faith. May God grant him to see his anger for what it is, to turn from violence, and to receive the forgiveness and new life that comes only through Jesus Christ, and may He give you peace as you entrust both justice and mercy to Him.