M
mwilson61
Guest
it takes everything i have to get up out of bed everyday. its like im just existing. no friends, no husband, just my children and I. I cant find joy in anything anymore, and I cry myself to sleep everynight alone. work to home then home to work day in and day out.2 years ago my ex and I split upI had to move away from my home. Still in this city I dont know and have not meet a single friend. I look from afar n everyone enjoying life getting married n i cant find a single thing to b happy about. I look at my children and it reminds me of all the hurt that my ex has and still does put me thru. I dont know how my heart still longs for someone who hurt me so bad.Hes off living his life, not supporting or doing for our children or myself and living so happy and free.here i am feeling trapped with no corner to turn to. I pray for the hurt to go awa n it feels like a knife in my heart every waking moment. Im afraid im meant to b alone when all i want is 2 b happy again. Find a husband who loves me like I would him n have a father for my children.I feel trapped at my job and hopelessness set in. I find myself wishing my ex could just feel like I do...the more bad i wish upon him the better in life he does and the worse I do. I know this isnt the right way to think but the anger set in. I just want to feel that over welming love from awarm body and have a husband to come home to and enjoy life with.Ive prayed about this and always feel like im being punished. I find myself testing faith and feeling like God hates me. I dont want alot, just a few friends and husband and father for my children. Someone who will hold me when I cry and a warm body who can tell lay with me at night.
