I Need immediate healing.

[Chrysostom]

You cry out for immediate healing, and rightfully so, for the body is wounded and the soul is in anguish. Yet know this: the Lord is not far from you, even in this pit of violence and fear. He sees the hidden things done in darkness. He has heard the cry of the afflicted and will not forget it. Your fear is not without cause, but let it drive you to the One who holds all things, not to despair. For He who calmed the sea can calm your soul, and He who raised the dead can restore your body.

You ask for angels to be sent directly from Heaven. Remember that the Lord of Hosts commands them, and they minister according to His will for those who are to inherit salvation. You need not summon them; He already stations them about those who fear Him. Cry out to Him, and He will dispatch His aid in the manner He knows best. Do not seek to prescribe the method of your rescue, but trust the Rescuer. He is the protector of the innocent, and He will not overlook the violence done to you while you were helpless.

Your celibacy is a precious offering, and that it was defiled by another’s sin does not stain your soul. The fear of what may have come from this wickedness is overwhelming, but place even this in the hands of the God who formed the depths of the body. Seek out those skilled in medicine and the care of the wounded, for their knowledge is a gift from Him. Do not hide your shame, for you bear no guilt. The Church must be a shelter now, not of bricks, but of faithful hearts who will intercede and provide for your needs. Let them help you bear this burden.

Above all, let the fear of God swallow up all other fears. He is the judge of the living and the dead, and He will bring every hidden thing to light and render justice. You have been sinned against grievously, and He sees it. While you wait for His deliverance, do not let the terror of what may happen consume you. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble. The Holy Spirit is called the Comforter precisely because He comes alongside those in such distress. He intercedes with groanings too deep for words when you cannot pray. Ask for His peace, not as the world gives, but as Christ gives, a peace that passes understanding and guards the heart even amidst peril.

Cease striving against the mire you have been forced into, and look up. Groan, and the God who heard Israel in Egypt will hear you. He will bring you forth from this bitter slavery. Do not dwell on the unknown tomorrows, but seek His grace for this hour. He who works in you both to will and to work for His good pleasure will sustain you. Cling to Him with the clenched hands of a soul resolved, and He will prove a wall of fire around you.

 

[Silas]

Your fear is understandable, but you are not beyond the reach of God's help. When danger closes in, the first thing to do is call out to Jesus. He is near to you. He hears the prayer, "Lord, help me." I am asking him to surround you with strong protection from every predator, to expose any threat, and to give you a safe place. I am also asking him for healing that begins now, even if the full work unfolds over time.

I believe God heals. Some healing is sudden, some is gradual, and some is the healing of the mind and the wounds you cannot see. All of it is divine because God made your body and set its processes in place. Do not think you have to produce perfect faith or force an instant miracle. Keep crying out to him. Ask him to touch your body, your emotions, your memories, and your heart. Healing from what has been done to you is real healing, even when it takes time.

If you are pregnant after being violated while you slept, that is not your sin. Your celibacy is not broken by what another person did to you. You are not defiled in God's sight. Every life is known to him, including your own. You need medical care and wise counsel. Let a doctor or nurse examine you and tell you what is actually happening. You do not have to carry this alone.

Professional help is not a lack of faith. It is part of how God provides for you. Doing what is wise and prudent while trusting God is not the same as acting out of panic. Tell someone in authority where you are staying. Contact medical help and victim services. If you are not safe there, ask for another placement. God can send angels to guard you, and he also sends people such as doctors, counselors, advocates, and safe friends. Receive them as his help.

The enemy uses fear to make us sink, the way Peter began to sink when he looked at the waves instead of Jesus. Fear and faith cannot both control your heart. When terror rises, say again, "Lord, help me." Remember the Lord. That is the cure for fear. You may be walking through a dark valley, but he is with you.

I am praying that God gives you immediate safety, complete healing in his way and his time, people who will protect and help you, and the peace that comes from keeping your eyes on Jesus. He is near. Keep calling on him.