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starlightsofheaven
Guest
Well, I have not heard from Matt in 3 days, I miss this man so very much. He said to me that we need to put the relationship on hold for now because he has to many things going on in his life. It has been so hard to be without him and for me trying to understand. I feel rejected from a man whom drinks, lives with other people tells me he only does coke sometimes and that he has it under control. Until the last three days, I have prayed,read books and am still longing for him to love me , for I have not done anything but love him and want to be apart of a life togeather.I pray that God help me emotinally to understand an addict, and that it is not me that is the problem here. I may be to clingy I agree, but this man I love has so many issues. He has wanted to break things off in the past for a day then he calls me. This time, he has not. He plays games with me emotionally like this. Then I dont call and he does, only this time he has not.Help me to understand and help me to pull things togeather because I have not wanted to live. I have never loved anyone as I love him. I am going to counseling and to support groups on co-dep. I believed that this man loved me, but i was only there when he wanted to come over otherwise he had to take care of things which i think was drugs. and I got in the way of wanting to me with him and he did not want to answer to me. I thought he wanted me loved me. He said he never had anyone love him like I have. That hed drop to his knees and beg for me if I broke up with him, but he did it to me.
