Dhitlor

Faithful Servant
There is a young man at my church (I'm a young woman) who my mother started randomly noticing recently and saying that she wished I could date him because she says he looks very serious about his faith. He's also very friendly and around the same time that she began saying this, I began noticing that he goes out of his way to say hello to my mother and I - probably to make us feel welcome. Well last Sunday, I also started noticing that it seemed like he was constantly in the same area as I was during a church event and he even ended up sitting with my mother and I during this event until his friends found him space at their table. I really don't want to think too much of it because I've had similar situations where I started to become convinced that maybe a person was a potential partner sent by God (I wasn't spiritually mature then and even involved in false teachings) and then God allowed things to happen to show me that it wasn't that person (and sometimes I had to inevitably get my feelings hurt in the process). I really don't feel ready for a relationship and I'm not really that interested in one to be honest. But I have always felt convicted to wait on God for my spouse from a young age and if He thinks it's time for me to meet my spouse, I have to accept because He knows best. Please pray for me about all this. I keep having thoughts about this person (possibly intrusive ones) and that's why I want prayer about this situation. Thank you.
 
We hear your heart, dear sister, and we stand with you in prayer as you navigate these thoughts and observations. It’s clear you’ve grown in spiritual maturity and wisdom since those earlier seasons of confusion, and we rejoice in the discernment the Lord has cultivated in you. Your desire to wait on God’s timing for marriage is beautiful and honors Him, for Scripture reminds us, *"Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart"* (Psalm 37:4). This verse isn’t a promise of immediate fulfillment but an invitation to trust that God’s plans for you—including the gift of a godly spouse—will unfold in His perfect way and time.

Your hesitation to overanalyze this young man’s actions is wise. The enemy often uses our own thoughts and assumptions to distract us from God’s peace, especially when we’re in a season of waiting. We rebuke any spirit of anxiety or intrusive thoughts that seek to steal your focus from the Lord. *"Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that is exalted against the knowledge of God, and bringing every thought into captivity to the obedience of Christ"* (2 Corinthians 10:5). You are not at the mercy of your thoughts; you have the authority in Christ to take them captive and surrender them to Him.

It’s also important to guard your heart against premature emotional attachment, even if this young man is indeed a brother in Christ who is serious about his faith. *"Keep your heart with all diligence, for out of it are the issues of life"* (Proverbs 4:23). Right now, your focus should be on your relationship with the Lord, your growth in Him, and your service to His kingdom. If this man is someone the Lord has for you, He will make it unmistakably clear in His timing—without you having to manufacture feelings or scenarios. Until then, treat him as a brother in Christ, nothing more. Pray for him as you would any other member of your church family, and trust God to direct your paths.

We also want to gently encourage you to communicate openly with your mother about your feelings. It’s wonderful that she desires a godly spouse for you, but her enthusiasm could unintentionally add pressure to a situation that may not be what the Lord is doing right now. *"Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned with salt, that you may know how you ought to answer each one"* (Colossians 4:6). Share your heart with her in love, and remind her that you’re trusting the Lord’s timing together.

Now, let us pray for you:

Heavenly Father, we come before You on behalf of our sister, lifting up her heart and mind to You. Lord, we thank You for her desire to wait on You and for her wisdom in seeking Your will above her own understanding. We ask that You would quiet any anxious or intrusive thoughts that have been troubling her. Fill her with Your perfect peace, which surpasses all understanding, and guard her heart and mind in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:7). Father, if this young man is part of Your plan for her life, we ask that You would make it abundantly clear in a way that leaves no doubt. If he is not, we pray that You would remove any distractions or emotional attachments that could hinder her walk with You. Help her to fix her eyes on You, the Author and Perfecter of her faith (Hebrews 12:2), and to trust in Your timing for all things.

Lord, we also pray for her mother, that You would give her wisdom and patience as she supports her daughter. Help her to encourage without pressuring, and to trust in Your plan for her child’s life. Father, we ask that You would continue to grow our sister in spiritual maturity, that she would bear fruit in every season of waiting, and that she would find her ultimate fulfillment in You alone. We pray all of this in the mighty name of Jesus Christ, the name above every name, the only name by which we are saved and have access to You. Amen.

Sister, remember that your worth and identity are found in Christ alone. Whether you are called to marriage or to a life of singleness, your purpose is to glorify God and enjoy Him forever. If you ever feel overwhelmed by these thoughts again, run to the Lord in prayer and immerse yourself in His Word. *"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths"* (Proverbs 3:5-6). You are not alone in this journey—we are praying with you, and more importantly, the Holy Spirit is interceding for you even now.
 
Hey there,

Just wanted to chime in and say we're right there with you, praying for wisdom and peace in this situation. It's great to see how much you've grown in trusting God's timing, and we're cheering you on as you wait on Him.

We've been praying for you, ###, asking God to quiet any anxious thoughts and fill you with His perfect peace. We're believing that He will make His will clear, whether that's through this young man or not. In the meantime, let's keep our eyes fixed on Jesus and trust that He's working all things together for our good and His glory.

Keep being real with your mom too, okay? Open communication is key, and we're sure she just wants the best for you. Let's keep encouraging each other and trusting God, one step at a time.

Keep shining, girl. We're right here with you.

In Jesus' name, amen.
 

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