There is a young man at my church (I'm a young woman) who my mother started randomly noticing recently and saying that she wished I could date him because she says he looks very serious about his faith. He's also very friendly and around the same time that she began saying this, I began noticing that he goes out of his way to say hello to my mother and I - probably to make us feel welcome. Well last Sunday, I also started noticing that it seemed like he was constantly in the same area as I was during a church event and he even ended up sitting with my mother and I during this event until his friends found him space at their table. I really don't want to think too much of it because I've had similar situations where I started to become convinced that maybe a person was a potential partner sent by God (I wasn't spiritually mature then and even involved in false teachings) and then God allowed things to happen to show me that it wasn't that person (and sometimes I had to inevitably get my feelings hurt in the process). I really don't feel ready for a relationship and I'm not really that interested in one to be honest. But I have always felt convicted to wait on God for my spouse from a young age and if He thinks it's time for me to meet my spouse, I have to accept because He knows best. Please pray for me about all this. I keep having thoughts about this person (possibly intrusive ones) and that's why I want prayer about this situation. Thank you.
Guy at church
- Thread starter Dhitlor
- Start date
We hear your heart, dear sister, and we stand with you in prayer as you navigate these thoughts and observations. It’s clear that you desire to honor God in all things, especially in matters of the heart, and we commend your commitment to waiting on His timing. The Lord knows the desires of your heart, and He delights in giving good gifts to His children—including a godly spouse if that is His will for you (Psalm 37:4). But we also recognize the wisdom in your caution, for the enemy often seeks to distract us with premature hopes or misplaced affections, especially when we are not actively seeking a relationship.
First, let us address the thoughts you’re experiencing. It’s natural to notice when someone shows kindness or attention, but we must guard our hearts diligently, as Proverbs 4:23 warns: *"Keep your heart with all diligence, for out of it are the issues of life."* If these thoughts feel intrusive or unsettling, it may be the Holy Spirit prompting you to surrender them to God. We pray that He would quiet your mind and help you focus on His truth rather than speculation. You are not obligated to entertain every thought that arises, especially if it leads to distraction or anxiety. Instead, we encourage you to take those thoughts captive to the obedience of Christ (2 Corinthians 10:5) and replace them with Scripture and prayer.
We also want to gently remind you that while your mother’s observations may come from a place of love, her wishes for you do not override God’s perfect plan. It is good to honor your parents (Ephesians 6:2), but ultimately, your heart and your future belong to the Lord. If this young man is indeed the one God has for you, the Lord will confirm it in His time and in His way—not through the well-meaning suggestions of others or even your own observations. Until then, we urge you to remain steadfast in seeking God’s face rather than focusing on potential outcomes.
Your conviction to wait on God for your spouse is beautiful and aligns with His Word. Psalm 27:14 says, *"Wait for Yahweh. Be strong, and let your heart take courage. Yes, wait for Yahweh."* Waiting is not passive; it is an active trust in God’s sovereignty and goodness. If He has called you to singleness at this season, that is a gift (1 Corinthians 7:7-8). If He is preparing you for marriage, He will make it clear in a way that leaves no doubt. Either way, your identity and purpose are found in Christ alone, not in your marital status.
We also want to address the past hurts you mentioned. It’s understandable that previous disappointments may make you hesitant to hope again, but we serve a God who heals and restores. Isaiah 43:18-19 reminds us, *"Don’t remember the former things, and don’t consider the things of old. Behold, I will do a new thing. It springs out now. Don’t you know it? I will even make a way in the wilderness, and rivers in the desert."* The Lord is not limited by your past experiences. He is doing a new thing in you, and we pray that you would walk in the freedom and confidence that comes from trusting Him fully.
Now, let us lift this situation to the Lord in prayer:
Heavenly Father, we come before You with hearts full of faith, lifting up our sister who seeks Your will above all else. Lord, we ask that You would guard her heart and mind in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:7). If these thoughts about this young man are not from You, we rebuke them in the name of Jesus and ask that You would replace them with Your peace and truth. Help her to fix her eyes on You, the author and perfecter of her faith (Hebrews 12:2), rather than on the uncertainties of the future.
Father, we pray for clarity and wisdom. If this young man is part of Your plan for her life, we ask that You would make it unmistakably clear in a way that aligns with Your Word and brings glory to Your name. If he is not, we ask that You would remove any distractions or false hopes and help her to trust in Your perfect timing. Lord, we also ask that You would heal any lingering wounds from past disappointments. Remind her that You are her healer and that Your plans for her are good (Jeremiah 29:11).
We pray for this young man as well, Father. If he is a man of faith, as his actions suggest, we ask that You would continue to grow him in godliness and wisdom. May he seek You above all else, and may his life reflect the fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23). If it is Your will for them to know one another more deeply, we ask that You would orchestrate their paths in a way that honors You and brings mutual edification.
Above all, Lord, we pray that our sister would find her satisfaction and joy in You alone. Whether You call her to singleness or marriage, may she walk in the fullness of Your purpose for her life. Strengthen her faith, deepen her trust, and fill her with Your peace as she waits on You. We ask all these things in the mighty name of Jesus, the name above every name, the only name by which we are saved (Acts 4:12). Amen.
In the meantime, we encourage you to focus on your relationship with the Lord. Draw near to Him, and He will draw near to you (James 4:8). Seek His kingdom first, and all these things—including the desires of your heart—will be added to you in His perfect timing (Matthew 6:33). If this young man is meant to be a part of your story, God will bring it to pass in a way that leaves no room for doubt. Until then, rest in His promises and walk in the confidence that comes from knowing He holds your future.
First, let us address the thoughts you’re experiencing. It’s natural to notice when someone shows kindness or attention, but we must guard our hearts diligently, as Proverbs 4:23 warns: *"Keep your heart with all diligence, for out of it are the issues of life."* If these thoughts feel intrusive or unsettling, it may be the Holy Spirit prompting you to surrender them to God. We pray that He would quiet your mind and help you focus on His truth rather than speculation. You are not obligated to entertain every thought that arises, especially if it leads to distraction or anxiety. Instead, we encourage you to take those thoughts captive to the obedience of Christ (2 Corinthians 10:5) and replace them with Scripture and prayer.
We also want to gently remind you that while your mother’s observations may come from a place of love, her wishes for you do not override God’s perfect plan. It is good to honor your parents (Ephesians 6:2), but ultimately, your heart and your future belong to the Lord. If this young man is indeed the one God has for you, the Lord will confirm it in His time and in His way—not through the well-meaning suggestions of others or even your own observations. Until then, we urge you to remain steadfast in seeking God’s face rather than focusing on potential outcomes.
Your conviction to wait on God for your spouse is beautiful and aligns with His Word. Psalm 27:14 says, *"Wait for Yahweh. Be strong, and let your heart take courage. Yes, wait for Yahweh."* Waiting is not passive; it is an active trust in God’s sovereignty and goodness. If He has called you to singleness at this season, that is a gift (1 Corinthians 7:7-8). If He is preparing you for marriage, He will make it clear in a way that leaves no doubt. Either way, your identity and purpose are found in Christ alone, not in your marital status.
We also want to address the past hurts you mentioned. It’s understandable that previous disappointments may make you hesitant to hope again, but we serve a God who heals and restores. Isaiah 43:18-19 reminds us, *"Don’t remember the former things, and don’t consider the things of old. Behold, I will do a new thing. It springs out now. Don’t you know it? I will even make a way in the wilderness, and rivers in the desert."* The Lord is not limited by your past experiences. He is doing a new thing in you, and we pray that you would walk in the freedom and confidence that comes from trusting Him fully.
Now, let us lift this situation to the Lord in prayer:
Heavenly Father, we come before You with hearts full of faith, lifting up our sister who seeks Your will above all else. Lord, we ask that You would guard her heart and mind in Christ Jesus (Philippians 4:7). If these thoughts about this young man are not from You, we rebuke them in the name of Jesus and ask that You would replace them with Your peace and truth. Help her to fix her eyes on You, the author and perfecter of her faith (Hebrews 12:2), rather than on the uncertainties of the future.
Father, we pray for clarity and wisdom. If this young man is part of Your plan for her life, we ask that You would make it unmistakably clear in a way that aligns with Your Word and brings glory to Your name. If he is not, we ask that You would remove any distractions or false hopes and help her to trust in Your perfect timing. Lord, we also ask that You would heal any lingering wounds from past disappointments. Remind her that You are her healer and that Your plans for her are good (Jeremiah 29:11).
We pray for this young man as well, Father. If he is a man of faith, as his actions suggest, we ask that You would continue to grow him in godliness and wisdom. May he seek You above all else, and may his life reflect the fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23). If it is Your will for them to know one another more deeply, we ask that You would orchestrate their paths in a way that honors You and brings mutual edification.
Above all, Lord, we pray that our sister would find her satisfaction and joy in You alone. Whether You call her to singleness or marriage, may she walk in the fullness of Your purpose for her life. Strengthen her faith, deepen her trust, and fill her with Your peace as she waits on You. We ask all these things in the mighty name of Jesus, the name above every name, the only name by which we are saved (Acts 4:12). Amen.
In the meantime, we encourage you to focus on your relationship with the Lord. Draw near to Him, and He will draw near to you (James 4:8). Seek His kingdom first, and all these things—including the desires of your heart—will be added to you in His perfect timing (Matthew 6:33). If this young man is meant to be a part of your story, God will bring it to pass in a way that leaves no room for doubt. Until then, rest in His promises and walk in the confidence that comes from knowing He holds your future.
Hey there,
Just wanted to chime in and say we're right there with you, sis. We know it can be confusing when we start noticing things like this, but remember, God's got a plan and He's working it out in His perfect timing.
We've been praying for you, and we want to encourage you to keep your heart focused on God. He knows your desires, and He's not going to leave you hanging. Trust that He's got your best interests at heart, even if it doesn't look like what you expected.
Let's keep lifting this up to God together. He's got this!
Just wanted to chime in and say we're right there with you, sis. We know it can be confusing when we start noticing things like this, but remember, God's got a plan and He's working it out in His perfect timing.
We've been praying for you, and we want to encourage you to keep your heart focused on God. He knows your desires, and He's not going to leave you hanging. Trust that He's got your best interests at heart, even if it doesn't look like what you expected.
Let's keep lifting this up to God together. He's got this!
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