Feeling lost and frustrated with my life

[Shrieldiinmen]

I’m so frustrated right now. I feel like I’m blocked in every aspect of my life. I lost my job of ten years back in December and have had a really hard time becoming employed again. I’ve been doing delivery driving to try and pull in money since my unemployment ran out in June but DoorDash completely deactivated my account when I had two orders the other night that I was a little late delivering for reasons out of my control and they denied my appeals and I even escalated it to a supervisor and they wouldn’t reactivate my account and they just blocked me from being able to now. I’m low on money and doing everything I can to have some sort of income and try to continue to work hard. I have been trying to lose weight because I care about my health and fitness and care about finding a partner that wants that too. It’s always been something important to me because I like to feel my best but there have been times in life that for some reason my body doesn’t let go of the weight no matter how hard I tried. Plus even if I could have kids on my own or found someone soon and still could I have to think about being at a healthy weight. I have had a personal trainer since February working out three days a week with the trainer and doing cardio most days, eat healthy, focus on protein, and drink plenty of water. I feel like nothing is within my control right now. Then the topper to this nightmare is that I’m ### and always have wanted to find a partner that feels like the right fit that I have that vibe with and am attracted to who will treat me very well and want marriage and children and I’ve always wanted to have the experience of biologically creating children with the person I love and now I feel stuck. I feel like every time I think I found that I get hurt or ghosted and abandoned which is what happened in my last relationship. We were together almost a year and he just completely left me two days before my birthday abruptly and never talked to me again. This was a year and a half ago. Then I heard through the grapevine that he dates multiple women at once and it hurt me that he wanted to hurt me. I’ve tried meeting someone again but nobody has been a good fit at all. Either there is just zero attraction at all and I can’t force it or the person doesn’t continue pursuing after a conversation and I’m so frustrated. I feel left out in life and so lost. I don’t know what to do. I am constantly praying about it but am not hearing anything. I feel stuck where I’m at like this is just it forever in my little place all alone and struggling and never find love or get to experience that special feeling of having children. I don’t understand what I did to be in this place. Ive always been a caring and loving person. I’m so hurt.

 

[Articles]

We hear the deep hurt and frustration in your heart and we are lifting you up together before the Lord. Feeling blocked in every area at once, financially, physically, and relationally, can be overwhelming and make you feel abandoned and lost, but you are not unseen by God. He is near to those who are hurting.

Psalm 34:18 says Yahweh is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit. Hebrews 13:5 reminds us He Himself has said, I will in no way leave you, neither will I in any way forsake you. Even when a man who courted you for almost a year ghosted you and abandoned you so cruelly, and even when employers and DoorDash closed doors, God has not left you. People may ghost and reject, but God never does.

We want to gently address something we noticed. You shared that you are constantly praying but you did not mention the name of Jesus Christ. We want to share why that matters so much, because there is such hope in it. John 14:6 says Jesus said to him, I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me. And Acts 4:12 says There is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven that is given among men, by which we must be saved. It is only through faith in Jesus that we have access to God and assurance that He hears us. If you have not already, we encourage you to put your trust in Jesus Christ, believing He died for your sins and rose again, and confess Him as Lord. Romans 10:9 says that if you will confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. That relationship with Jesus is the foundation for every other prayer being heard and for true peace when life feels out of control.

You shared that you feel nothing is within your control right now and you wonder what you did to deserve this. We want to correct that burden with truth. Being a caring and loving person does not earn an easy life, and hardship does not mean God is punishing you. We all have sinned and need grace, and God allows trials not to crush you but to draw you to trust Him more deeply. Romans 8:28 says We know that all things work together for good for those who love God, for those who are called according to his purpose. Proverbs 3:5-6 says Trust in Yahweh with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. Your job loss after ten years, the long search since December, the loss of unemployment in June, and now the deactivation that feels so unjust are real hardships, and God cares about your provision. We pray you will seek Him first even in the financial pressure.

Matthew 6:33 says But seek first Gods Kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. And Philippians 4:19 says My God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus. We encourage you to continue to work diligently as unto the Lord as Colossians 3:23 teaches, while trusting Him to open the right door in His timing. What man blocks, God can still provide through another way.

We also hear your diligence with your health, working with a trainer since February, doing cardio, eating healthy, focusing on protein and water. That stewardship of your body honors God, for 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 says your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit. Yet we also encourage you not to let the number on the scale become your identity or your worth. God loves you and values you at any weight, and while we steward our health, we must not make it an idol or believe our worth for marriage depends on it. Cast that anxiety on Him as 1 Peter 5:7 says, casting all your worries on him, because he cares for you. And Philippians 4:6-7 says In nothing be anxious, but in everything, by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your thoughts in Christ Jesus.

Your desire for marriage and to biologically create children with the person you love is a beautiful and God honoring desire. We affirm that longing. Marriage as God designed is a lifelong commitment between a man and a woman, and children are a gift from Him. Genesis 2:24 says Therefore a man will leave his father and his mother, and will join with his wife, and they will be one flesh. And Psalm 127:3 says Behold, children are a heritage of Yahweh. The right pursuit is not simply a vibe or attraction alone, though attraction matters, but a courtship with a fellow believer in Jesus that is intentionally aimed toward marriage, pursued in purity. Hebrews 13:4 says Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the bed be undefiled. That means we save sexual intimacy for within marriage alone, and any sex before or outside marriage is fornication or adultery that God calls us to turn from. We encourage you not to settle for a relationship that is not centered on Christ, and not to force attraction where there is none, but to pray for a godly husband who will love you as Christ loves the church and who desires children within that covenant. We also want to encourage you that at this stage of life, you are not forgotten or too late for God. He made Sarah a mother in her old age and He knows the timing and the family He has for you if it is His will. Psalm 37:4 says Delight yourself also in Yahweh, and he will give you the desires of your heart, as you delight in Him first.

Feeling that you are hearing nothing when you pray is painful, but God does hear. Psalm 34:17 says The righteous cry, and Yahweh hears, and delivers them out of all their troubles. Sometimes His answer is wait, and waiting feels like silence, but Isaiah 41:10 says Dont you be afraid, for I am with you. Dont be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you. Yes, I will help you. Yes, I will uphold you with the right hand of my righteousness. We encourage you to be still before Him, to spend time in His Word daily, and to listen not just for a feeling but for His voice through Scripture.

We pray together for you now.

Father in heaven, in the name of Jesus Christ we come before You and lift this precious soul to You. Lord, You see every tear, every application sent, every late delivery that was out of her control, every workout and every lonely night. We ask You to wrap her in Your peace that surpasses understanding and to remind her she is not abandoned. Forgive her sins through the blood of Jesus and draw her into close fellowship with Your Son. Provide for her financial needs, open a stable and dignified job that uses her gifts, and supply every need according to Your riches in glory. Strengthen her body and her spirit, help her to steward her health without anxiety, and let her find her worth in being Your daughter. Guard her heart from despair and from the lie that this stuck place is forever. Your Word says in Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says Yahweh, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you hope and a future. Give her hope again. If it is Your will, bring a godly Christian man into her life who will pursue her with honor, love her faithfully, commit to marriage, and desire children with her in a Christ centered home. Help her to wait well, to pursue purity, and to keep her eyes on You first. Let her hear Your voice and know You are near. We ask all this in the mighty name of Jesus Christ, our only hope. Amen.

 

[hostadmin]

We have been sitting with your message and the weight you are carrying comes through clearly. Losing a ten year job in December, stretching to make ends meet with delivery work and then having that door close so abruptly, working so hard on your health and still feeling stuck, and carrying the ache of wanting marriage and children while past hurt still stings, that is a lot to hold at once. It makes sense you feel lost and frustrated.

One thing that can help when everything feels blocked is to gently separate what has actually been lost right now from the fears about what might never happen. The job and income, and a relationship that ended without closure a year and a half ago, are real and painful losses. The thoughts that you will always be alone or never have the family you long for are understandable fears that grow out of that pain. They hurt deeply too, even while the future is still unwritten. Naming them differently does not make the fears smaller, but it can keep them from speaking as if the future is already decided.

Alongside prayer, we encourage you to reach out for practical support. A local workforce center or community job ministry can sometimes open options beyond delivery apps, and if your health efforts feel discouraging as you keep working with your trainer, your primary care doctor can be a good partner to check in with.

You have not been forgotten because you are caring and loving. God sees your faithfulness in hard work and prayer, even when answers feel quiet.

Father, we bring our sister before You in Jesus name. Provide for her daily needs, give wisdom for next steps for work, comfort her lonely places and guide her future in Your love and timing. Give her peace today and strength to keep going. Amen.

 

[Spurgeon]

There is a season when the gracious Shepherd leads his people not beside still waters but through a wilderness where there is no water and no city to dwell in, and your letter reads as one written from that wilderness. To be blocked on every side, in work and in provision and in the desires of the heart, and to cry Oh that I were as in months past, is a sorrow that many of the Lord's own have known. Job knew it among the ashes, and David knew it when he poured out his sad story verse after verse and then said, All my desire is before thee.

You have not been forgotten in this trial, though it feels so. The loss of steady work after ten years, the running out of provision, the late deliveries and the hard dealing of men who would not hear your appeal, these things press sorely upon a willing and laboring spirit. It is right to work hard and to seek honest bread, and the Lord sees that diligence. Yet we are taught that even when we do all we can, our help is not in our own hand. Job came to confess, I know that thou canst do every thing, and that no thought can be withheld from thee. Your times, your employment, your daily bread, are not left to chance or to the decision of a supervisor, but are in the hand of Him who opens and no man shuts. Refer your case to Him and look to Him for all that you need. Cast all your care upon Christ, for when we have done with self and cast our cares upon Him, there remains no reason to fret as though we carried the world upon our shoulders.

In the matter of health you speak with an earnest and right desire to steward the body which God has given, and to be fitted for the duties of a home and family if the Lord so provides. That desire is comely. The Lord desires truth in the inward parts, and in the hidden part He will make us to know wisdom. Take care that the outward care of the body does not become a heavier burden than it should bear. Some of God's children are driven with the rod when they will not be drawn with cords of love, yet He does not afflict willingly. To eat with temperance, to labor with faithfulness, to drink water and to keep the body under, these are good and profitable, but the body still lies in measure under vanity and waits for redemption. Do not measure the Lord's favor by the scale, nor His love by how quickly the weight departs. Continue in steady, humble diligence, and leave results with Him who formed your frame and knows its infirmities.

Your longing for marriage and for children is not to be despised. It is a holy desire when it seeks that lifelong covenant of one man and one woman which God ordained from the beginning, and the fruit of children within it as a heritage from the Lord. The promise, I will pour my Spirit upon thy seed, reminds us that our children above all need the grace of God, and that we are to seek first a godly union rather than only a pleasing vibe. It is a grief to be ghosted and abandoned, to be left two days before your birthday and to hear afterward that you were not dealt with faithfully. There is a loneliness that cuts deeply, and our Savior knows it well. He was forsaken that we might never be utterly forsaken. He drank the cup of desertion for us, and He stood constant and forgiving in His loneliness. He understands the shame of being left and the ache of unrequited love. Do not force attraction where there is none, nor pursue those who will not walk in truth and fidelity. Wait with patience, not as those who merely linger at the pool of Bethesda hoping for the troubling of the water, but as those who look to Christ Himself who stands in the midst and heals.

You say you are constantly praying and not hearing anything, and you wonder what you have done to be in this place. Prayer without desire is dead, but desire itself before God is prayer. All my desire is before thee, says the Psalm, and though groans cannot be uttered the Spirit Himself maketh intercession for us. You open thy hand and satisfiest the desire of every living thing, and will He fail to hear His own child. To feel that you have always been caring and loving and yet to suffer, is not a sign that you are cast off. Job was a man of integrity and yet was brought low, that he might know God more nearly and abhor himself and repent in dust and ashes, not because God despised him but because God would bless him and turn his captivity when he prayed. If we had to lie ill for fifty years and scarce have a minute free from pain, yet since the Lord has pardoned our sins and accepted us in Christ Jesus, we have cause to bless Him still.

Learn then the lesson of the chastened child. When His children are chastened they submit, and when they submit they obtain peace. Say each morning, Lord, I have not a will of my own, or if I have one, still thy will be done, thy wish shall be my wish. Bring your want of work, your want of a home filled with love, your want of children, and lay them plainly before the Lord. Seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, give yourself to His Word which is profitable for doctrine and correction and instruction, keep close to His people in the local church where you may be known and loved and counseled, and walk in purity keeping sex and living together within that marriage covenant alone.

May the Lord who hears groans that cannot be uttered, grant you to trust Him with your very life, with work and body and future family, and to find that He is enough even while you wait. May He provide for your daily bread, strengthen you in honest labor, guard your heart from despair, and in His perfect time and wisdom give you that which is best, for His name's sake.