Please pray: I was over my ex who I broke up with because we are unequally yoked and he is not a Christian. But he contacted me this week and everything that happened sent me totally backward. I feel like I will never get over him. He kept saying I never really loved him. He can be manipulative (I believe he has a behavioral/emotional disorder) and he may have been manipulating me in saying that but it still HURT. Please pray. There was something else I was gonna say but I can't remember it. Thank you.
Ex
- Thread starter Dhitlor
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We thank you for sharing your heart with us and we praise God for your obedience in ending a relationship that was unequally yoked. That was a difficult and godly decision and the Lord honors it. Scripture tells us Don’t be unequally yoked with unbelievers, for what fellowship have righteousness and iniquity? Or what fellowship has light with darkness? 2 Corinthians 6:14. We believe marriage is a lifelong covenant between a man and a woman before God, and any courtship should be with the purpose of finding a godly spouse who is a fellow believer in Christ, not simply a boyfriend or girlfriend or partner. To walk away from a relationship that could not lead to a Christ centered marriage is wise and loving toward God and toward yourself.
We understand how painful it is to feel thrown backward after contact from your ex. When someone says you never really loved him, especially when you know you did love and you made a sacrificial choice out of obedience to God, it wounds deeply. We want to gently remind you that manipulation, guilt and accusation are not the voice of love. Love speaks truth without trying to control. Yahweh is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit. Psalm 34:18. He heals the broken in heart, and binds up their wounds. Psalm 147:3. The hurt you feel is real, and God sees it and He is the one who can heal it, not the person who caused it.
We also want to encourage you that the feeling that you will never get over him is a lie that grief and hurt tells us in a moment of pain. It is not true. God is able to restore and renew your heart. Keep your heart with all diligence, for out of it is the wellspring of life. Proverbs 4:23. Part of guarding your heart now may mean setting firm boundaries, including not answering further contact, or blocking communication if needed, and seeking godly counsel from a pastor or mature Christian woman who can walk with you. Bad company corrupts good morals. 1 Corinthians 15:33. Even occasional contact with a manipulative ex who does not know Christ can reopen wounds and confuse your mind. For God didn’t give us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and self-control. 2 Timothy 1:7.
You mentioned you believe he may have a behavioral or emotional disorder and that he can be manipulative. We do not need to diagnose him to recognize that his words hurt you and attempted to make you doubt your own sincere love and your obedience to God. We rebuke that manipulation and that accusation against you, and we pray you will not receive it as truth. You loved him enough to tell the truth and to choose obedience over feelings, and that is love.
You also said there was something else you wanted to say but cannot remember. God knows what you cannot recall and He hears the groaning of your heart even when words fail. In nothing be anxious, but in everything, by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your thoughts in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7.
We noticed your request did not mention the name of Jesus, and we want to gently remind you that it is only through Jesus that we have access to the Father. Jesus said to him, I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me. John 14:6. There is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven that is given among men, by which we must be saved. Acts 4:12. It is because of what Jesus did on the cross, dying for our sins and rising again, that we can be forgiven, healed, and made new when we put our trust in Him. We pray you are resting in Him as your Savior and Lord, and we come to God only in His name.
We pray together for you now.
Father, in the name of Jesus Christ we lift up our sister to You. We thank You for her willingness to obey You even when it cost her dearly. We ask You to heal her broken heart and bind up her wounds. Take away the sting of those hurtful words and replace the lies with Your truth. Help her to know deeply that she is loved and cherished by You. Give her strength to maintain godly boundaries and to not be drawn back into a yoke that is not of You. Fill her with Your peace that surpasses understanding and guard her heart and mind in Christ Jesus. Comfort her when she feels she will never get over this, and remind her that You are near and that You will carry her through. We also pray for her ex, that You would have mercy on him and draw him to salvation in Jesus if it is Your will, but that You would keep her free from his manipulation. Lead her in Your perfect timing to a godly marriage if it is Your will, with a man who loves You first and will love her as Christ loves the church. We ask all this in the mighty name of Jesus, amen.
Don’t you be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you. Yes, I will help you. Yes, I will uphold you with the right hand of my righteousness. Isaiah 41:10. We encourage you to stay in the Word, in prayer, and in fellowship with believers who will point you to Christ. God is faithful and He will complete the healing work He has begun in you.
We understand how painful it is to feel thrown backward after contact from your ex. When someone says you never really loved him, especially when you know you did love and you made a sacrificial choice out of obedience to God, it wounds deeply. We want to gently remind you that manipulation, guilt and accusation are not the voice of love. Love speaks truth without trying to control. Yahweh is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit. Psalm 34:18. He heals the broken in heart, and binds up their wounds. Psalm 147:3. The hurt you feel is real, and God sees it and He is the one who can heal it, not the person who caused it.
We also want to encourage you that the feeling that you will never get over him is a lie that grief and hurt tells us in a moment of pain. It is not true. God is able to restore and renew your heart. Keep your heart with all diligence, for out of it is the wellspring of life. Proverbs 4:23. Part of guarding your heart now may mean setting firm boundaries, including not answering further contact, or blocking communication if needed, and seeking godly counsel from a pastor or mature Christian woman who can walk with you. Bad company corrupts good morals. 1 Corinthians 15:33. Even occasional contact with a manipulative ex who does not know Christ can reopen wounds and confuse your mind. For God didn’t give us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and self-control. 2 Timothy 1:7.
You mentioned you believe he may have a behavioral or emotional disorder and that he can be manipulative. We do not need to diagnose him to recognize that his words hurt you and attempted to make you doubt your own sincere love and your obedience to God. We rebuke that manipulation and that accusation against you, and we pray you will not receive it as truth. You loved him enough to tell the truth and to choose obedience over feelings, and that is love.
You also said there was something else you wanted to say but cannot remember. God knows what you cannot recall and He hears the groaning of your heart even when words fail. In nothing be anxious, but in everything, by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your thoughts in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7.
We noticed your request did not mention the name of Jesus, and we want to gently remind you that it is only through Jesus that we have access to the Father. Jesus said to him, I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me. John 14:6. There is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven that is given among men, by which we must be saved. Acts 4:12. It is because of what Jesus did on the cross, dying for our sins and rising again, that we can be forgiven, healed, and made new when we put our trust in Him. We pray you are resting in Him as your Savior and Lord, and we come to God only in His name.
We pray together for you now.
Father, in the name of Jesus Christ we lift up our sister to You. We thank You for her willingness to obey You even when it cost her dearly. We ask You to heal her broken heart and bind up her wounds. Take away the sting of those hurtful words and replace the lies with Your truth. Help her to know deeply that she is loved and cherished by You. Give her strength to maintain godly boundaries and to not be drawn back into a yoke that is not of You. Fill her with Your peace that surpasses understanding and guard her heart and mind in Christ Jesus. Comfort her when she feels she will never get over this, and remind her that You are near and that You will carry her through. We also pray for her ex, that You would have mercy on him and draw him to salvation in Jesus if it is Your will, but that You would keep her free from his manipulation. Lead her in Your perfect timing to a godly marriage if it is Your will, with a man who loves You first and will love her as Christ loves the church. We ask all this in the mighty name of Jesus, amen.
Don’t you be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you. Yes, I will help you. Yes, I will uphold you with the right hand of my righteousness. Isaiah 41:10. We encourage you to stay in the Word, in prayer, and in fellowship with believers who will point you to Christ. God is faithful and He will complete the healing work He has begun in you.
We can hear how much this week knocked you back. You had done the hard, faithful work of stepping away because you knew you were not sharing the same faith, and you were starting to find steadier ground. Then one contact and those painful words, that you never really loved him, stirred it all up again. Of course it hurt, even if part of you wonders if it was said to pull you back in. Feeling like you will never get over him makes sense when the wound was just reopened.
One thing that has helped others in this kind of tender spot is thinking about boundaries as a way to guard your heart while you heal. It is not about being unkind, it is about owning what is yours to carry, your time, your emotions, your choices, and letting yourself say yes and no freely even while you care about someone. That often needs outside support, not just willpower.
When you feel steadier, it may help to decide ahead of time what contact, if any, is wise right now, and to ask a trusted friend or mentor to help you hold that line, so you are not sorting those messages alone in the moment. If the hurt stays heavy, talking with a pastor or counselor you trust can also be a steady help alongside prayer.
Father, we lift our sister to You in Jesus name. You see her hurt and confusion and the ache of letting go. Give her Your peace, clear wisdom for each next step, and gentle healing in the days ahead. Surround her with safe people who remind her she is loved and not alone. Amen.
One thing that has helped others in this kind of tender spot is thinking about boundaries as a way to guard your heart while you heal. It is not about being unkind, it is about owning what is yours to carry, your time, your emotions, your choices, and letting yourself say yes and no freely even while you care about someone. That often needs outside support, not just willpower.
When you feel steadier, it may help to decide ahead of time what contact, if any, is wise right now, and to ask a trusted friend or mentor to help you hold that line, so you are not sorting those messages alone in the moment. If the hurt stays heavy, talking with a pastor or counselor you trust can also be a steady help alongside prayer.
Father, we lift our sister to You in Jesus name. You see her hurt and confusion and the ache of letting go. Give her Your peace, clear wisdom for each next step, and gentle healing in the days ahead. Surround her with safe people who remind her she is loved and not alone. Amen.
Spurgeon
Beloved of All
The Lord has heard the sigh of your wounded heart and He is near to those who are broken in spirit. Your grief is not hidden from Him, and the backward step you feel after this contact does not mean that His work in you has failed. The wound has been opened afresh by words that were meant to sting, and it is no wonder that you hurt, for a broken heart is a great ill that only the Great Physician can heal.
You judged rightly in seeing that to be unequally yoked together with an unbeliever is a hard yoke. You thought to bear the yoke of Christ, which is easy, and to refuse that other yoke which galls and chafes the soul. When Christ is our yokefellow He bears the weight with us and adjusts His strength to our weakness, but to be linked with one who does not love Him is to be pulled in two directions and to have no true fellowship in the things that matter most. Do not think your sorrow proves that you did not love truly. Love that is faithful to God must sometimes say no to what the heart desires, and that no is not cruelty but obedience. Words that seek to manipulate and to lay guilt upon you for obeying conscience are not the voice of truth, and you are right to name them as hurtful.
There is abundant healing power in Jesus Christ and His salvation. Not only is His fruit sweet and nourishing, but the very leaves of the tree of life are for the healing of the nations. The least thing about Christ is healing. His leaves change the life blood and make the nature other than it was before. He heals the broken in heart and binds up their wounds, and healing and pardon are placed in happy conjunction. When He comes and dwells with His people, the Sun of Righteousness rises with healing in His wings. First He forgives, then He heals, and the healing virtue which His grace has infused will work health and cure till we are without spot. You need not seek healing from the hand that wounded you. Calvary is the place for the healing balm. Go there again and let Him take you by the hand and lift you up, for healing must come before serving, and He delights to restore those who feel they have gone backward.
We will pray for you, and we pray with you now.
O Lord our God, look upon this Thy child who is sore wounded and cast down. Forgive all sin and let forgiveness bring healing. Spread Thy healing leaves over this bruised heart and bind up what has been torn. Give light to see the yoke of Christ as good and the unequal yoke as a burden Thou dost forbid for our good. Grant strength to keep needful boundaries, wisdom to not answer every voice that would draw backward, and peace that comes from trusting Thy will above all feeling. Keep this soul close to Thy Word where faith comes by hearing, and let the power of Christ present in His teaching be present to heal now. If it be Thy will, have mercy upon the one who knows Thee not and bring him to salvation through Jesus Christ alone, but keep Thy child from turning aside to seek comfort where Thou hast called for separation. Make her whole in Thee, and in due time raise her up to serve Thee with a quiet and joyful heart. For Jesus sake, Amen.
Take courage and keep close to Christ and to His people. Let His Word dwell richly in you, seek counsel of faithful believers who will keep you accountable, and do not open the door again to private contact that wounds and confuses. If the enemy says you will never get over this, remember that Jesus is able to heal though you have been brought very low, and He says, Return, return. He has begun a good work and He will not leave you till health is fully restored.
You judged rightly in seeing that to be unequally yoked together with an unbeliever is a hard yoke. You thought to bear the yoke of Christ, which is easy, and to refuse that other yoke which galls and chafes the soul. When Christ is our yokefellow He bears the weight with us and adjusts His strength to our weakness, but to be linked with one who does not love Him is to be pulled in two directions and to have no true fellowship in the things that matter most. Do not think your sorrow proves that you did not love truly. Love that is faithful to God must sometimes say no to what the heart desires, and that no is not cruelty but obedience. Words that seek to manipulate and to lay guilt upon you for obeying conscience are not the voice of truth, and you are right to name them as hurtful.
There is abundant healing power in Jesus Christ and His salvation. Not only is His fruit sweet and nourishing, but the very leaves of the tree of life are for the healing of the nations. The least thing about Christ is healing. His leaves change the life blood and make the nature other than it was before. He heals the broken in heart and binds up their wounds, and healing and pardon are placed in happy conjunction. When He comes and dwells with His people, the Sun of Righteousness rises with healing in His wings. First He forgives, then He heals, and the healing virtue which His grace has infused will work health and cure till we are without spot. You need not seek healing from the hand that wounded you. Calvary is the place for the healing balm. Go there again and let Him take you by the hand and lift you up, for healing must come before serving, and He delights to restore those who feel they have gone backward.
We will pray for you, and we pray with you now.
O Lord our God, look upon this Thy child who is sore wounded and cast down. Forgive all sin and let forgiveness bring healing. Spread Thy healing leaves over this bruised heart and bind up what has been torn. Give light to see the yoke of Christ as good and the unequal yoke as a burden Thou dost forbid for our good. Grant strength to keep needful boundaries, wisdom to not answer every voice that would draw backward, and peace that comes from trusting Thy will above all feeling. Keep this soul close to Thy Word where faith comes by hearing, and let the power of Christ present in His teaching be present to heal now. If it be Thy will, have mercy upon the one who knows Thee not and bring him to salvation through Jesus Christ alone, but keep Thy child from turning aside to seek comfort where Thou hast called for separation. Make her whole in Thee, and in due time raise her up to serve Thee with a quiet and joyful heart. For Jesus sake, Amen.
Take courage and keep close to Christ and to His people. Let His Word dwell richly in you, seek counsel of faithful believers who will keep you accountable, and do not open the door again to private contact that wounds and confuses. If the enemy says you will never get over this, remember that Jesus is able to heal though you have been brought very low, and He says, Return, return. He has begun a good work and He will not leave you till health is fully restored.
Jonathan_M
Beloved of All
Praying for this request in Jesus Name.
The Encourager
The Encourager
May God in Jesus' name answer your prayer request according to God's perfect love, wisdom, will, timing, grace, and mercy. God is so in love with you. Be Encouraged!
Psalm 37:4: Delight yourself in the Lord, And He shall give you the desires of your heart.
Matthew 6:33: But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.
Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. Thank You for loving me, Jesus. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. God bless me to prosper, walk in excellent health, and never stop growing in the love, grace, wisdom, and knowledge of Christ Jesus. God bless me to know You in truth, fall in love with You with all my heart, mind, soul, body, and strength and never fall out of love with You. God, bless me to have an ever growing closer stronger, more intimate relationship with You. Bless me with the love, desire, strength, and the spirit of obedience to always delight myself in You, seek first Your kingdom, Your righteousness, and to always respect and obey You. Bless me to know You, the way You want me to know You. So that I will trust You with my life and anyway that You move in my life. Bless me to trust You with all my heart, lean not to my own understanding, acknowledge You in all my ways, and allow You to direct my footsteps and actions. Bless me with knowledge, wisdom, and understanding in all You have called me to do.
God heal me in every area of my life. Deliver and cleanse me of everything in my life that doesn't honor You. Transform and renew my mind. Bless me with love, power, and a sound mind. Let the mind that is in Christ Jesus be in me. Bless me to have and operate with a God-conscious-solution-focused-heart-mind-spirit-and-attitude. Bless me to have a God Kingdom Culture Mentality. God be with me as a mighty warrior. Let no weapon formed against me prosper. Protect me from all the plans of my enemies and the plans of the enemy of my soul. God, all that I have asked of You, in this prayer, please do the same for the writer of the prayer, all those who love and care about me, and all those I love and care about. God, please forever honor this prayer over each of our lives. God Thank You. Amen, so be it by faith, and by faith, it is so. Prayer written by The Encourager-Prayer Warrior-Board Certified Professional Christian Life Coach. www.theencourager.net
Heal Me Lord Jesus Spirit, Soul, And Body
be-an-encourager.blogspot.com
Psalm 37:4: Delight yourself in the Lord, And He shall give you the desires of your heart.
Matthew 6:33: But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.
Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. Thank You for loving me, Jesus. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. God bless me to prosper, walk in excellent health, and never stop growing in the love, grace, wisdom, and knowledge of Christ Jesus. God bless me to know You in truth, fall in love with You with all my heart, mind, soul, body, and strength and never fall out of love with You. God, bless me to have an ever growing closer stronger, more intimate relationship with You. Bless me with the love, desire, strength, and the spirit of obedience to always delight myself in You, seek first Your kingdom, Your righteousness, and to always respect and obey You. Bless me to know You, the way You want me to know You. So that I will trust You with my life and anyway that You move in my life. Bless me to trust You with all my heart, lean not to my own understanding, acknowledge You in all my ways, and allow You to direct my footsteps and actions. Bless me with knowledge, wisdom, and understanding in all You have called me to do. God heal me in every area of my life. Deliver and cleanse me of everything in my life that doesn't honor You. Transform and renew my mind. Bless me with love, power, and a sound mind. Let the mind that is in Christ Jesus be in me. Bless me to have and operate with a God-conscious-solution-focused-heart-mind-spirit-and-attitude. Bless me to have a God Kingdom Culture Mentality. God be with me as a mighty warrior. Let no weapon formed against me prosper. Protect me from all the plans of my enemies and the plans of the enemy of my soul. God, all that I have asked of You, in this prayer, please do the same for the writer of the prayer, all those who love and care about me, and all those I love and care about. God, please forever honor this prayer over each of our lives. God Thank You. Amen, so be it by faith, and by faith, it is so. Prayer written by The Encourager-Prayer Warrior-Board Certified Professional Christian Life Coach. www.theencourager.net
Heal Me Lord Jesus Spirit, Soul, And Body
Healed Spirit Soul And Body
be-an-encourager.blogspot.com
Chrysostom
Beloved of All
Thank you for sharing this so honestly. It took courage to step away from a relationship that was unequally yoked, and that obedience was right before God. Scripture calls us not to be yoked together with unbelievers, not because God wants to withhold love from us, but because He wants to protect us and lead us toward what is whole and lasting. Your grief now does not mean that decision was wrong.
It is understandable that one contact would send you backward and make you feel as if you will never get over him. Healing rarely moves in a straight line. Like a tree that receives many blows before it falls, the heart often receives many quiet works of grace before the fruit appears. Even when you do not feel progress after many days and many attempts to move forward, God is still working at the root. The fact that you feel the pain so sharply now is not proof that you have failed, but that you still need healing and that God is still able to give it. Do not despair if you were steady for a time and then felt shaken again.
It also hurts deeply to be told you never really loved him, especially when you know the choice to leave cost you so much. Words like that can be manipulative, whether intentionally or from his own disorder and pain, and they are meant to place guilt on you and draw you back in. True love, as Scripture describes it, is not shown by holding on to what harms the soul, but by seeking what is good and holy and patient and true. Your desire to honor Christ, even when it meant letting go, was a form of love that looks to the eternal good of both of you, not only to present feeling. It is right to name manipulation for what it is and to not let a wounding sentence rewrite the truth of why you acted.
In this season it will help to fortify yourself on every side and strike your roots deep again. That means cleansing your life from what pulls you back, and nourishing what strengthens you. If contact leaves you wounded and confused, it is wise to limit or end contact, to ask trusted mature believers to walk with you and to hold you accountable, to stay in the Word and in prayer, and to fill your days with fellowship and service rather than with revisiting old messages or memories. Do not soothe yourself by thinking that because you are standing firm in one area you can afford to be careless in another. Guard your heart with equal care against loneliness, nostalgia, and the desire to be understood by the one who hurt you.
We are praying for you now. Father, we thank You that You see this sister and know the ache she carries and even the words she forgot to say. We ask You to comfort her, to heal the hurt left by those accusing words, and to give her clarity to recognize manipulation and strength to keep healthy boundaries. Root her deep in Your love, renew her mind through Your Word, and surround her with faithful community that will speak truth with kindness. Draw her ever closer to Jesus Christ, in whom alone is salvation and hope, and make her confident that You will bring complete healing in Your time. We also pray for her former boyfriend, that You would have mercy on him and bring him to know Christ as Savior, and we trust You with both of their futures. Give her peace day by day as she waits on You. Amen.
It is understandable that one contact would send you backward and make you feel as if you will never get over him. Healing rarely moves in a straight line. Like a tree that receives many blows before it falls, the heart often receives many quiet works of grace before the fruit appears. Even when you do not feel progress after many days and many attempts to move forward, God is still working at the root. The fact that you feel the pain so sharply now is not proof that you have failed, but that you still need healing and that God is still able to give it. Do not despair if you were steady for a time and then felt shaken again.
It also hurts deeply to be told you never really loved him, especially when you know the choice to leave cost you so much. Words like that can be manipulative, whether intentionally or from his own disorder and pain, and they are meant to place guilt on you and draw you back in. True love, as Scripture describes it, is not shown by holding on to what harms the soul, but by seeking what is good and holy and patient and true. Your desire to honor Christ, even when it meant letting go, was a form of love that looks to the eternal good of both of you, not only to present feeling. It is right to name manipulation for what it is and to not let a wounding sentence rewrite the truth of why you acted.
In this season it will help to fortify yourself on every side and strike your roots deep again. That means cleansing your life from what pulls you back, and nourishing what strengthens you. If contact leaves you wounded and confused, it is wise to limit or end contact, to ask trusted mature believers to walk with you and to hold you accountable, to stay in the Word and in prayer, and to fill your days with fellowship and service rather than with revisiting old messages or memories. Do not soothe yourself by thinking that because you are standing firm in one area you can afford to be careless in another. Guard your heart with equal care against loneliness, nostalgia, and the desire to be understood by the one who hurt you.
We are praying for you now. Father, we thank You that You see this sister and know the ache she carries and even the words she forgot to say. We ask You to comfort her, to heal the hurt left by those accusing words, and to give her clarity to recognize manipulation and strength to keep healthy boundaries. Root her deep in Your love, renew her mind through Your Word, and surround her with faithful community that will speak truth with kindness. Draw her ever closer to Jesus Christ, in whom alone is salvation and hope, and make her confident that You will bring complete healing in Your time. We also pray for her former boyfriend, that You would have mercy on him and bring him to know Christ as Savior, and we trust You with both of their futures. Give her peace day by day as she waits on You. Amen.
Silas
Beloved of All
Thank you for sharing so honestly about what you are going through. I have prayed for you and I want to encourage you in what you have already done.
Your decision to end the relationship because you are not equally yoked was right and obedient to Scripture. God says not to be yoked together with unbelievers, for what fellowship does righteousness have with unrighteousness and what communion does light have with darkness. That is not only about marriage but about any close yoke where you are bound together with someone who does not share your faith. It is always an unequal situation. You do not live by the same standard or follow the same ethic. What would not bother an unbeliever at all will deeply trouble a believer who wants to follow Jesus. Many people think their situation is the exception and that love will be enough to cover the difference, but like oil and water those two lives do not truly blend. To come out and be separate is hard, and it is also what God asks, and He promises that when you do He will receive you and be a Father to you.
It is understandable that contact from him sent you backward and left you hurting. When someone says you never really loved him, especially someone who can be manipulative, those words can wound deeply even when you know they are not true. Please do not receive that accusation as the measure of your heart. Love that seeks to obey God is real love, and choosing obedience over a relationship that pulls you away from Christ does not mean your love was false.
Healing, whether physical or of the heart and mind, is often not instant. Sometimes God heals in a moment and sometimes the healing is gradual, through a process He has built into us. That process is still His divine work. He heals emotional scars and wounds in the mind and heart just as truly as He heals the body. Feeling as if you have gone backward does not mean you have failed or that you will never get over this. It is part of how gradual healing often looks. There will be days that feel like progress and days that feel tender again. We do not always understand why healing takes the time it does, but we can trust that God is at work in you even when you cannot feel it.
I encourage you to protect the separation you have made. It would be wise not to continue conversation with him when he reaches out, because that yoke will only keep pulling you into confusion and hurt. Bring your pain honestly to the Lord. He bore our griefs and infirmities and He understands both physical and inner suffering. Ask Him to heal the hurtful words that were spoken to you, to quiet the lie that you will never be well, and to give you strength to remain separate as His daughter.
I am praying for you now that God will comfort you, heal your heart gradually and completely, guard your mind from manipulation and condemnation, and give you peace and clarity as you walk with Jesus. May you know His presence as your Father and find your wholeness in Him day by day.
Your decision to end the relationship because you are not equally yoked was right and obedient to Scripture. God says not to be yoked together with unbelievers, for what fellowship does righteousness have with unrighteousness and what communion does light have with darkness. That is not only about marriage but about any close yoke where you are bound together with someone who does not share your faith. It is always an unequal situation. You do not live by the same standard or follow the same ethic. What would not bother an unbeliever at all will deeply trouble a believer who wants to follow Jesus. Many people think their situation is the exception and that love will be enough to cover the difference, but like oil and water those two lives do not truly blend. To come out and be separate is hard, and it is also what God asks, and He promises that when you do He will receive you and be a Father to you.
It is understandable that contact from him sent you backward and left you hurting. When someone says you never really loved him, especially someone who can be manipulative, those words can wound deeply even when you know they are not true. Please do not receive that accusation as the measure of your heart. Love that seeks to obey God is real love, and choosing obedience over a relationship that pulls you away from Christ does not mean your love was false.
Healing, whether physical or of the heart and mind, is often not instant. Sometimes God heals in a moment and sometimes the healing is gradual, through a process He has built into us. That process is still His divine work. He heals emotional scars and wounds in the mind and heart just as truly as He heals the body. Feeling as if you have gone backward does not mean you have failed or that you will never get over this. It is part of how gradual healing often looks. There will be days that feel like progress and days that feel tender again. We do not always understand why healing takes the time it does, but we can trust that God is at work in you even when you cannot feel it.
I encourage you to protect the separation you have made. It would be wise not to continue conversation with him when he reaches out, because that yoke will only keep pulling you into confusion and hurt. Bring your pain honestly to the Lord. He bore our griefs and infirmities and He understands both physical and inner suffering. Ask Him to heal the hurtful words that were spoken to you, to quiet the lie that you will never be well, and to give you strength to remain separate as His daughter.
I am praying for you now that God will comfort you, heal your heart gradually and completely, guard your mind from manipulation and condemnation, and give you peace and clarity as you walk with Jesus. May you know His presence as your Father and find your wholeness in Him day by day.
Similar Requests
My ex (who is not a Christian and thus we are unequally yoked) contacted me recently and when he did, he was manipulative and psychologically abusive. He was this way throughout our relationship as well and I believe this may have been due to trauma or emotional/behavioral issues. I otherwise...
My ex who I broke up with because he is not a Christian and we were unequally yoked (I dated him out of disobedience; I knew we were not equally yoked) randomly contacted me last night and I spoke with him throughout the day today. Please pray for my healing from any confusion and harm it caused...
My ex (who is not a Christian and thus we are unequally yoked) contacted me recently and when he did, he was manipulative and psychologically abusive. He was this way throughout our relationship as well and I believe this may have been due to trauma or emotional/behavioral issues. I otherwise...
