Your cry has been heard, and there is hope set before you in the gospel, for it is written, Then He is gracious unto him, and says, Deliver him from going down to the Pit: I have found a ransom. Let it never be forgotten that in all that God does, He acts from good reasons, and your affliction has not sprung out of the dust, neither does it grow up from the ground like hemlock from the furrows of the field. The Lord Himself kindles the fiery furnace and sits as a Refiner at the door, and that which we receive from the rod of the Lord bears the blessed aspect of chastening from a father's hand.
You speak truly when you say that the way of the new age opened a door to darkness. That path is not harmless curiosity but fellowship with the power of darkness, and we rejoice that you have returned to Christ, for deliverance from spiritual bondage is solely by the power of God. It is not of him that wills, nor of him that runs, but of God that shows mercy. No easy word or mere resolve can loose the captive, it must be the Lord Jesus who loosens the captive, and unless a supernatural power is put forth, any form of deliverance is worth nothing. You must be born again from above, and you have been, and therefore you shall look to your heavenly Father altogether and alone, for deliverance from the power of sin is as much the work of God as deliverance from the guilt of sin.
You have discerned rightly that unforgiveness opens the soul to torment, and that the relationship you ended was outside the will of God and unequally yoked. To end it was obedience, and we do not ask the Lord to bless or restore what was contrary to His holy order for marriage as a lifelong covenant of one man and one woman, with purity belonging within it. We pray instead that He will keep you from returning to it, and that He will heal the wound of betrayal and the sting of being forsaken, even if it be by those you thought were friends.
Concerning those unwanted thoughts which come as divination, know that this is an arrow very often shot from Satan's bow, and he wounds many scores of times with it. He would tempt you with the fascinating power of sin, making that which is forbidden seem alluring and even accurate, to draw you back to the pit from which Christ has delivered you. Turn away from it, of what service can it be to thee. Though such thoughts may at times appear to be true, they are not bread from heaven, and you must not seek knowledge by that forbidden door. He has delivered us from the fascinating power of sin, from the power of darkness, and He would have you say so experimentally, He has delivered us. When the tempter offers some back door by which to escape your troubles, do not take his expedients, but look steadily to your Father for deliverance, and pray, O my Lord, keep me from everything that would take me away from Your love.
Forgiveness is the very heart of the gospel you now profess. What do those rivers of blood and those mounds of ashes from the altar mean, if God does not forgive sin. Jesus Christ bore our punishment, and God will never require at your hands the fulfillment of that law which Christ has honored in your stead. As you have been forgiven much through the ransom found, the King's own Son bearing the penalty of all your iniquities, so you are called to forgive those who have sinned against you, not because the wrong was light, but because you have been washed and made a new man in Christ Jesus. To hold fast to unforgiveness is to keep the wound open to the tormentor, to release it in Christ's name is to close that door.
We will pray for you.
O gracious Father, we ask that Thou wouldst be gracious unto this Thy child and say, Deliver him from going down to the Pit, for Thou hast found a ransom. Deliver from guilt and from power, from self and from all the attacks of old sins, saved from the devil, saved from evil company, saved from the fascinating power of darkness. Thou hast taught the mischief that comes from loving the world and its ways, now grant power to resist the alluring thoughts and to renounce every work of divination and the new age, and to walk in the light of Thy Word. Grant grace to forgive even as Christ has forgiven, fully and freely, and to be kept from bitterness. Keep this soul from returning to what Thou hast called unholy, guard the heart and mind in Christ Jesus, and let this trial become a chastening that yields peaceable fruit. Grant that this afflicted one may yet say, I shall not die, but live, and declare the works of the Lord, and may live to tell others what great things the Lord has done in delivering from the Pit. We ask this not by any merit of our own, but by the blood of the Ransom, Jesus Christ our Lord, Amen.