We hear the deep ache in your heart for your daughter and your grandchildren and we join you in bringing them before the throne of grace in Jesus' name. We carry this burden with you, asking for God's will to be done in their lives and for His healing to break through years of pain, anger and rejection.
What your daughter endured in her marriage was evil and contrary to God's design for marriage. A husband is called to love his wife as Christ loved the church and to live with her in an understanding way, not to beat her or commit adultery, and those sins left deep wounds on her and on her children. The Lord sees what was done to her and He is close to the brokenhearted. Psalm 34:18 says Yahweh is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit. Psalm 147:3 says He heals the broken in heart, and binds up their wounds. We also grieve with you over the death of her husband and the miserable life before it, and we know that somehow still loving him shows how complex and deep those wounds are, but God can heal even that tangled grief.
We must lovingly speak the truth about what is happening now in that home because God calls us to turn from what harms us. The disrespect, yelling, screaming and cursing from her son and the coldness from her daughter toward their mother is sin and it grieves the Lord. Exodus 20:12 says Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land which Yahweh your God gives you. Ephesians 6:1-3 says Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. The rage and quick anger that explodes over every word is also something God warns us about. Ephesians 4:26-27 says Be angry, and don’t sin. Don’t let the sun go down on your wrath, and don’t give place to the devil. James 1:19-20 says let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anger, for the anger of man doesn’t produce the righteousness of God. And Colossians 3:8 says put away all these, anger, wrath, malice, slander, and filthy language out of your mouth. This anger has been allowed to take root and it is now ruling that home.
We also must address your daughter's drinking. Even if it is not every day, drunkenness is a refuge that will only deepen depression and overwhelm and keep her from the clear mind God wants her to have to raise her children and seek Him. Ephesians 5:18 says Don’t be drunken with wine, in which is dissipation, but be filled with the Spirit. 1 Peter 5:7-8 reminds us to cast all our worries on him, because he cares for us, and to be sober and self-controlled. Alcohol will not make things easier, it will make the darkness heavier, and we pray she will turn from it completely and seek the Lord's strength instead.
We understand your pain when you speak of God's love and they reject whatever you have to say. You are not alone in that. Jesus Himself was rejected in His own town. Mark 6:4 says A prophet is not without honor, except in his own country, and among his own relatives, and in his own house. John 1:11 says He came to his own, and those who were his own didn’t receive him. Do not be discouraged when the seed seems to fall on hard ground. Isaiah 55:11 says so is my word that goes out of my mouth, it will not return to me void, but it will accomplish that which I please. Your faithful witness, your prayers and your visits every few months are not wasted. Galatians 6:9 says Let us not be weary in doing good, for we will reap in due season, if we don’t give up.
We encourage you to keep praying for them without ceasing, and to pray not only for things to get easier but for their hearts to be surrendered to Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7 says In nothing be anxious, but in everything, by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your thoughts in Christ Jesus. 1 John 5:14 says This is the boldness which we have toward him, that if we ask anything according to his will, he listens to us. God's will is for your daughter to be sober and free, for these children to honor their mother, for anger to be put away and for all of them to be comforted and saved through faith in Christ.
We encourage you also to keep pointing them toward consistent fellowship in a Bible believing church and toward godly counsel, not just counseling that they resist, but pastors and elders who will speak the Word faithfully. For your daughter, we pray she will find a local body where she can be supported as a widow and a mother, where the children can be taught the Word and be under authority that loves them. Proverbs 22:6 says Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it. That training is so needed now. And for you, we pray you will have wisdom to love them with boundaries, to not enable the drinking or the disrespect, but to speak truth in love and to continue to model the patience and gentleness of Christ when you are with them and when you are apart.
We pray together now.
Heavenly Father, we come before You in the name of Jesus Christ, our only Savior and mediator, and we lift up this dear daughter, her son and her daughter, and this faithful grandmother who loves them so deeply. Lord, You see the years of abuse, betrayal, and pain, You see the grief that still lingers after this husband and father's death, You see the depression and anger that has settled over this home. We ask You to have mercy. Heal their broken hearts, bind up their wounds, and bring Your peace that passes understanding into that house. Lord, convict this daughter of her need to turn from alcohol and to cast all her cares on You, give her strength to be sober, to seek You daily in Your Word and prayer, and to lead her children with love and firmness. Convict this son of his rage and cursing and disrespect, soften his hard heart, teach him to put away anger and wrath and to honor his mother. Soften the daughter's heart as well, that she would show love and kindness to her mother. Draw each one to repentance and to faith in Jesus, that they would be saved and filled with Your Spirit. Comfort this grandmother, strengthen her, let her not grow weary in well doing, and let her see fruit from the seeds she has sown. Give her wisdom for every visit, every phone call, every prayer, and provide for this family spiritually, emotionally and physically. We ask that You would bring godly helpers and a faithful church around them and break the chains of depression and anger in that home. We trust Your promise in Romans 8:28 that all things work together for good for those who love God, to those who are called according to his purpose. We ask all this in the mighty name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and our only hope. Amen.
Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. Thank You for loving me, Jesus. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. God bless me to prosper, walk in excellent health, and never stop growing in the love, grace, wisdom, and knowledge of Christ Jesus. God bless me to know You in truth, fall in love with You with all my heart, mind, soul, body, and strength and never fall out of love with You. God, bless me to have an ever growing closer stronger, more intimate relationship with You. Bless me with the love, desire, strength, and the spirit of obedience to always delight myself in You, seek first Your kingdom, Your righteousness, and to always respect and obey You. Bless me to know You, the way You want me to know You. So that I will trust You with my life and anyway that You move in my life. Bless me to trust You with all my heart, lean not to my own understanding, acknowledge You in all my ways, and allow You to direct my footsteps and actions. Bless me with knowledge, wisdom, and understanding in all You have called me to do. 
