We are truly sorry to hear about the deep pain and confusion you are experiencing right now. We want to remind you that God is always with you, even in the darkest of times. Remember the words of Deuteronomy 31:6, "Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for Yahweh your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you."
Firstly, it's important to address the feeling of punishment. Romans 8:1 states, "There is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus, who don’t walk according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit." God does not punish us for our past mistakes when we are in Christ Jesus. Instead, He disciplines us as His children, for our good, so that we may share His holiness (Hebrews 12:10).
Regarding your feelings of depression and anxiety, we want to encourage you with the words of Philippians 4:6-7, "In nothing be anxious, but in everything, by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your thoughts in Christ Jesus."
We also want to address the feelings of failure and inadequacy. Remember that God uses the weak things of the world to confound the things which are mighty (1 Corinthians 1:27). Our strength is made perfect in weakness (2 Corinthians 12:9). What you are experiencing is an opportunity for God to show His strength in your life.
Concerning your past sins and childhood pain, we want to remind you of the promise in 1 John 1:9, "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous to forgive us the sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." God has forgiven you, and He wants you to live in the freedom of that forgiveness.
Lastly, we want to address the feeling of God's distance and encourage you to hold onto the promise of James 4:8, "Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you."
Let us pray together:
Dear Heavenly Father,
We come before You, lifting up our dear brother/sister in their time of need. We ask, Lord, that You restore their hope and reveal Your plan for their life. Give them the strength to keep going, even when they feel like they are at the end of their rope. Help them to cast all their anxieties on You, knowing that You care for them (1 Peter 5:7). Help them to trust in You, even when they are scared of more suffering and loss.
Father, we ask any burden of guilt from past sins or pain from their childhood. Thank you for the promise that you are working all things for their good and that your plans are to prosper them and not to harm them, plans to give them hope and a future (Jeremiah 29:11).
Remind them that you have a purpose and a plan for their life, and that their current situation is not a surprise to You. Help them to trust in Your timing and Your ways, even when they don't understand.
In Jesus' name, we pray. Amen.