We hear your heart and you are not bothering us at all, we are grateful you reached out and we want to stand with you in this season of anxiety, depression, and feeling a loss of purpose.
We want to gently answer your question, yes, God can and does use seasons of brokenness, anxiety, and emptiness to draw us to Himself. He does not delight in your suffering, for He is a God of peace and comfort, but He does allow times of struggle to wake us up to our deep need for Him and to show us that the peace and purpose we long for can only be found in Him. As it is written, Yahweh is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit. Psalm 34:18. And we know that all things work together for good for those who love God, to those who are called according to his purpose. Romans 8:28. That good is not always that the pain disappears immediately, but that it draws us closer to the One who can truly heal and restore us.
The anxiety you feel is not what God desires for you to live under. His desire is to carry that burden for you. We are told casting all your worries on him, because he cares for you. 1 Peter 5:7. And also In nothing be anxious, but in everything, by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your thoughts in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7. That peace does not come from trying harder or finding purpose in ourselves, it comes from bringing everything honestly to Him.
That loss of purpose you describe is something many feel when we look for meaning apart from our Creator. The Word tells us For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says Yahweh, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11. Your purpose is not lost to Him. You were created with intention, for good works which God prepared in advance that we would walk in them. Ephesians 2:10. And Jesus invites you Come to me, all you who labor and are heavily burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart; and you will find rest for your souls. Matthew 11:28-29. True rest and purpose are found not in circumstances, but in knowing Him and walking with Him daily.
We noticed you asked about God but did not mention Jesus, and we want to lovingly share that it is only through Jesus that we have access to God and find that peace and purpose. Jesus said to him, I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father, except through me. John 14:6. There is salvation in none other, for neither is there any other name under heaven, that is given among men, by which we must be saved. Acts 4:12. If you have not yet placed your trust in Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior, we encourage you to do so today, to confess your need for Him, believe that He died for your sins and rose again, and invite Him to be Lord of your life. That relationship is the foundation for true peace, forgiveness, and eternal purpose. If you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. Romans 10:9.
We want to encourage you to seek Him daily through prayer and reading His Word, even when you do not feel like it, to be honest with Him about your anxiety and emptiness, and to stay connected to other believers who can support and pray for you. If your anxiety and depression feel overwhelming, please also reach out to a trusted pastor, counselor, or medical professional, God can use those helps as part of His care for you. Do not walk through this alone.
We are praying for you now.
Father, in the name of Jesus we lift up this dear one to You. You see the anxiety and depression and the feeling of purposelessness that weighs so heavily. We ask that You draw near as the God who is close to the brokenhearted. We pray that You would reveal Yourself to them in a personal way and show them that You are indeed using even this difficult season to call them closer to You. Give them Your peace that surpasses all understanding to guard their heart and mind in Christ Jesus. Quiet their anxious thoughts and remind them that they are deeply loved, fully known, and created with purpose by You. Lead them to salvation and deeper trust in Jesus Christ if they do not yet know Him, and renew their hope for the future that You have promised. Strengthen them day by day, help them to cast every care on You, and guide them to godly support and counsel. Let them find rest for their soul in Jesus and joy in walking in the purpose You have for them. We ask all this in the mighty name of Jesus Christ, Amen.
We encourage you to keep seeking Him, He hears you and He cares more than you know. Don't you be afraid, for I am with you. Don't be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you. Yes, I will help you. Yes, I will uphold you with the right hand of my righteousness. Isaiah 41:10.