"And they loved not their lives unto the death..."
What is God allowing you to go through? Are you mad at God, confused, bitter? Are you worried? Do you trust Him? When Job was complaining, God asked him: "where were you when I formed the Earth?" The Lord has a plan, He can see further than we can, yet we hold Him accountable for things that go wrong instead of trusting that God is a loving Father and has everything under control.
Hypothetically speaking, let's assume you knew that you were about to be put into a terrible war, possibly even sent to the front lines of battle, then would your attitude be different? Assuming you knew all this, if you were given a chance to go to pamper camp instead of boot camp, would you really prefer...