CuppyCakes
Disciple of Prayer
I know I have not been the Christian I can be and I am not sure if my reasons are legit or just excuses. We have been struggling financially for ### years now but everyone I find the chance to get ahead a road block comes down. We moved so I could get a job and take care of my disabled mom but then I ended up in the hospital ### days after the move with a ruptured colon. I have the surgery and figure I could start working but then a massive hernia stopped that. Now I have been told no more working AND ### more surgeries this month. Mom is so stressful and so much work, daughter is mentally unstable hubby has BAD hip issues but if he doesn't work we don't survive. I applied for disability but that takes months. Out rent is late and this month we don't know where it's coming from. My medical expenses and meds take most of our money. I won ### dollars on a radio contest, went to get check and no more than got home and ### utilities got shut off, ### are necessary ### is not but the payments took all but ###. We were going to pay our rent ahead with that. My daughter hasn't had a Christmas in ### years and no tree last year. We have had ### surgeries ### strokes and ### serious car wrecks in these ### years. I am so depressed I can barely function. So much needs done but too hard to face day in and day out. All the help I ask for is met with "so?". I don't know where to turn, I try to leave it to God but panic takes over. I can't not worry when it's all on my shoulders and we don't know if we will have a roof the next day. I need spiritual guidance and some help from the Lord. If it's a test I am afraid with my health I won't live to be graded on it. My blood pressure is so dangerously high. I have tried all I can think of. God help us to help ourselves, lead me to the path please.
