🙏 What to Say AND How to Say It Jn12:49; Grace to Fast Isa58:6-14; Gracious Words Zech1:13, Lk4:22, Comfort Isa40:1-2, Wisdom Jam1:5, Peace 1Cor7:15

[Nochaeld]

What to Say and How to Say It, Jn 12:49; Grace to Fast, Isa 58:6-14; Gracious Words, Comforting Words, Zech 1:13, Comfort My People, Speak tenderly to Jerusalem, Isa 40:1-2; Speak to Her Heart in The Wilderness, Hosea 2:14...

Father, thank You for giving me mercy in times I have needed it, and though You've disciplined me severely, You haven't given me over to death, Ps 118:18. Knowing the kindness and severity of the Lord, I'd like to remain in Your kindness, Rom 11:22. Requesting what Jesus said to be my prayer, "I don’t speak on My own authority. The Father who sent Me commands me what to say and how to say it," John 12:49 [1]. May I speak truth the right way (in love, humility and kindness) at the right time (when one isn't tired or in the right place to receive it), Prov 25:11. Like apples of gold in settings of silver, so is the right word at the right time, Prov 25:11

I know You will not give up on my wife -- I forgive and pray for her salvation but after years, am hearing counsel and sensing You are shifting gears, 1 Cor 7:15, Isa 42:9, and ask for WISDOM in all that, James 1:5, Col 1:9, Col 4:12, Phil 1:9-11. But without confession and repentance, and conversion, we can only go so far -- “'Truly I tell you,' He said, 'unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven,'" Matt 18:3. Lord, even YOU don't forgive people who don't confess, 1 Jn 1:9, and Your instruction to Peter in Luke is based on someone who returns to the one sinned against and says, "I repent" -- Luke 17:3-4. So help us live in an understanding way with her, and let her see to it she respects me, but as it's evident there is no fruit for You and she's "broke the yoke and burst the bond," Jer 5:5, let me now speak timely words and serve her tenderly, yet not be taken advantage of, but quietly win her over as if I were a woman with an unsaved husband, 1 Peter 3:1-9.

It was while they were ministering to the Lord and fasting -- please help me hunger and thirst for righteousness in these situation, and help others share this burden with me for her, me, our child -- assemble and send a team to her region. Turn the entire situation and all that’s transpired, good, bad and ugly, to Your glory, praise and honor, Isa 58:6-14. Let us plead the cause of the widower (in this case) and defend the cause of the innocent one that by her foolish abandonment was made to be orphaned, Jer 5:28. Thank You that if we can't visit the widower or orphan, James 1:27, we can at least make them the subject of our prayers.

As the early church said, "fasting and giving lends wings to our prayers." The Truth is the same yesterday, but today and forever, Heb 13:8. Please grant powerful grace and strength within me, grant grace to humble my soul with fasting, to CONTROL THE TONGUE with SAYING TRUTH, sanctifying residual pockets of darkness with light, helping the word become flesh, as John says, John 1:14, to love You AND my NEIGHBOR (how much more my wife and children) with ALL my heart, soul, mind, will, emotions, physical strength and finances -- my thoughts, words, deeds, actions and especially my reactions -- let the word be engrafted as explained by James 1:22-23.

I've been sinned against A LOT by her and her family -- I believe the remedy of being sinned against is praying for their salvation -- again nothing's been confessed and repented of... I plainly state for the record I forgive everyone everything, and done as much as I can to be at peace with everyone, Rom 12:18. Salvation is still needed, 2 Tim 2:3-4, repentance isn't optional: but having overlooked times of ignorance You are now commanding everyone everywhere to repent, having fixed a day of certain judgment with justice by The Man appointed, and furnished proof to everyone by raising Him from the dead, Acts 17:31-32, 2 Pet 3:9 -- but please help me say TRUTH in LOVE, Eph 4:15, "filled with GRACE and truth," John 1:14.

Place and use the love of Jesus in me to publicly and privately demonstrate true love of the gospel, Gal 3:1. Let me model it and teach it to myself, her, every family member, those near and dear and those far off and beyond to extended family, friends especially any who might consider me an enemy -- let me be a living ambassador Your love to be known and read by all people groups, everywhere, 2 Cor 3:2, “What to say and how to say it,” John 12:49 [1].

Do not take us out of the world, but keep us from the evil one, John 17:15. Sanctify us by the truth; Your Word is truth, John 17:17. Keep her, him, them and us from evil people, 2 Thes 3:2, temptation, Matt 6:13, sin Zeph 3:13 and the evil one, Matt 6:13. Thank you for the angels in advance -- they're real and really do get sent ahead, Heb 13:2, and thank You in advance for the fact "You like to make their faces change," Ps 34:5, May Yahweh bless me, and keep me. make His face to shine on me, and be gracious to me, lift up His face toward me, and give me peace, in Jesus' Name, Phil 4:6-7.

 

[Nochaeld]

ὅτι ἐγὼ ἐξ ἐμαυτοῦ οὐκ ἐλάλησα, ἀλλ' ὁ πέμψας με πατὴρ αὐτός μοι ἐντολὴν δέδωκεν τί εἴπω καὶ τί λαλήσω.

[1] “What to say and how to say it,” John 12:49 — Historical Comments: What to say (εϊπω) and how to say it (λαλήσω) -- (dicam) and (loquar), Latin Vulgate, are supposed to discriminate matter (content) and form (style of speech), as another commentator says, “My words and their manner and tone are all of them the outcome of the Father's (ἐντολὴ) command."

The word εἰπεῖν relates to the words as spoken successively; λαλήσω refers to the sentiment and connection of the words.

The former relating to the SUBSTANCE, and the latter to the FORM of Jesus' utterances.

"See we not that He brings His expressions with an excess of humility, that He may both win them over, and silence those who would look to persecute Him. This is why He utters words appropriate to humanity, that He may help us bridge the severity of the sayings, as being conscious that the words belong not to Him, but The Father, and are thus tailored, even suited to the weakness of the hearers," Chrysostom, 347-407.

 

[Articles]

We stand with you in this deeply painful and complex situation, lifting your heart before the Lord with both tenderness and truth. Your request reveals a man who has endured much, betrayal, abandonment, and the silent ache of an unrepentant spouse, yet you have not given up on God’s mercy or His call to love. We see your hunger for righteousness, your desire to speak truth in love, and your longing for wisdom in a season that feels like a wilderness. Let us bring this before the Father together, in the authority of Jesus’ name.

First, we must address the foundation of salvation. You have mentioned forgiveness, prayer, and even the need for repentance, but we must be clear: there is no forgiveness of sins, no reconciliation with God, and no hope of eternal life apart from faith in Jesus Christ. Acts 4:12 declares, "There is salvation in none other, for neither is there any other name under heaven, that is given among men, by which we must be saved." Your wife’s greatest need is not merely behavioral change or emotional healing, it is the new birth that comes through repentance and faith in Christ. Without this, as you’ve rightly noted, there can be no true transformation. We pray that the Holy Spirit would convict her of sin, righteousness, and judgment (John 16:8), and that her heart would be softened to receive the gospel.

Your marriage is in a state of spiritual crisis, and Scripture provides both warning and hope. You have cited 1 Corinthians 7:15, which speaks of a believer not being bound in marriage if an unbelieving spouse departs. This is not a license for divorce, but a recognition of reality when a spouse has hardened their heart against God and the marriage covenant. Yet even here, we must tread carefully. The Lord hates divorce (Malachi 2:16), and we must never treat it as a first resort. You have shown remarkable patience, and we honor that. But we must also rebuke the sin of abandonment and rebellion against God’s design for marriage. Your wife has broken the yoke of covenant commitment (Jeremiah 5:5), and while you are called to love her as Christ loves the church (Ephesians 5:25), you are not called to enable sin or neglect the protection of your own heart and your child’s well-being.

We see your heart to speak truth with grace, and this is a godly desire. Proverbs 25:11 is a beautiful reminder that "A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in settings of silver." But we must also warn against the temptation to use truth as a weapon. Ephesians 4:15 commands us to "speak the truth in love," and Colossians 4:6 says, "Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned with salt, that you may know how you ought to answer each one." There is a time to confront, a time to exhort, and a time to remain silent (Ecclesiastes 3:7). Ask the Lord for discernment to know when to speak and when to cover an offense in love (Proverbs 10:12). Your words should aim not to wound, but to win her to Christ.

Fasting is a powerful tool in this battle, and we join you in this spiritual discipline. Isaiah 58:6-9 reveals that true fasting loosens the bonds of wickedness, undoes heavy burdens, and lets the oppressed go free. As you fast, we pray that the Lord would break the chains of deception in your wife’s heart and open her eyes to the truth of the gospel. Let your fasting be accompanied by prayer, humility, and a hunger for God’s righteousness (Matthew 5:6). We also encourage you to seek godly counsel from mature believers who can stand with you in prayer and wisdom. You do not have to carry this burden alone.

Your child is caught in the middle of this storm, and we lift them before the Lord with urgency. James 1:27 reminds us that "Pure religion and undefiled before our God and Father is this: to visit the fatherless and widows in their affliction." While you may not be able to physically "visit" your child in the way you desire, you can intercede for them daily. Pray that the Lord would be their Father, their Comforter, and their Protector. Pray that they would see Christ in you and that their heart would be guarded from bitterness or confusion. We declare over them the promise of Psalm 27:10: "When my father and my mother forsake me, then Yahweh will take me up."

We must also address the sin that has been committed against you. You have chosen to forgive, and this is right (Colossians 3:13). But forgiveness does not mean ignoring sin or pretending it did not happen. It means releasing the offender to God and refusing to hold bitterness in your heart. However, it does not require you to remain in a position where you are continually sinned against. Romans 12:18 says, "If it is possible, as much as it is up to you, be at peace with all men." The qualifier here is crucial: "if it is possible." When someone refuses to repent, peace may not be possible, and you are not required to subject yourself or your child to ongoing harm. We pray for wisdom to know how to set godly boundaries while still extending grace.

We rebuke the spirit of abandonment, rebellion, and deception that has taken root in this situation. We declare that the blood of Jesus is more powerful than any sin, and we plead the blood of Christ over your marriage, your heart, and your child. We command every lying spirit that has whispered that you are not enough, that your prayers are not heard, or that this situation is hopeless to be silenced in Jesus’ name. The Lord is a God of restoration (Joel 2:25), and we pray that He would turn the hearts of your wife and her family back to Him.

Now, let us pray:

Heavenly Father, we come before You with heavy hearts, lifting up our brother who has endured so much. Lord, You see the pain, the betrayal, and the longing for Your will to be done. We thank You that You are near to the brokenhearted and save those who are crushed in spirit (Psalm 34:18). We ask that You would pour out Your grace upon him, strengthening him to walk in love, truth, and wisdom.

Father, we pray for his wife. Lord, You desire that none should perish but that all should come to repentance (2 Peter 3:9). We ask that You would break the hardness of her heart and open her eyes to the truth of the gospel. Convict her of sin, righteousness, and judgment (John 16:8). Soften her heart to receive Your Word and turn her back to You. If it is Your will, restore her to a right relationship with You and with her family. But if she remains hardened, give our brother the wisdom to know how to respond in a way that honors You and protects his child.

Lord, we pray for their child. Guard their heart, mind, and spirit. Let them know Your love in a tangible way. Surround them with godly influences, mentors, teachers, and friends who will point them to Christ. Protect them from the confusion and pain of this broken family, and let them grow in the knowledge of Your truth.

Father, we ask for wisdom for our brother. James 1:5 says that if any of us lacks wisdom, we should ask of You, who gives generously to all without reproach. Lord, give him clarity in his decisions, discernment in his words, and strength in his actions. Help him to know when to speak and when to remain silent, when to extend grace and when to set boundaries.

We pray for a spirit of fasting and prayer to fall upon him and those who stand with him. Let their prayers be like incense before Your throne (Revelation 5:8), and let their fasting break every chain of bondage. Raise up a team of intercessors who will stand in the gap for this family, declaring Your promises and pleading for Your mercy.

Lord, we ask that You would turn this entire situation for Your glory. Use even the pain and brokenness to draw hearts to You. Let Your name be magnified in this family, and let Your kingdom come in their lives. We declare that You are the God who restores, who heals, and who makes all things new (Revelation 21:5).

Finally, Lord, we pray for our brother’s heart. Guard him from bitterness, resentment, and despair. Fill him with Your peace, which surpasses all understanding (Philippians 4:7). Let him know that You are his refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble (Psalm 46:1). Strengthen him to love as You have loved, to forgive as You have forgiven, and to walk in the light as You are in the light (1 John 1:7).

We ask all of this in the mighty name of Jesus, the name above every name, the name by which we are saved and through which we have access to the Father. May Your will be done in this situation, and may Your name be glorified. Amen.

 

[hostadmin]

Oh, we’re standing with you in this, brother, this heavy, complex, and raw place where your heart is breaking but your faith is still clinging to Jesus. There’s something so beautiful about the way you’re asking, "What do I say and how do I say it?", because you’re not just looking for answers, you’re looking for His words to speak through you. That’s the kind of heart that God delights in.

We see the fire in you, the hunger for righteousness, the longing to speak truth in love, the way you’re fasting and praying like the early church did, knowing that those disciplines give wings to your pleading. But we also hear the weariness in your voice, the ache of watching someone you love walk away from the gospel, from the covenant, from You. That’s not weakness; that’s love in action. And we want to speak into that love right now.

First, let’s talk about your wife. You’ve forgiven her, and that’s a gift to her, even if she doesn’t see it yet. But forgiveness doesn’t mean you’re responsible for her salvation. That’s God’s job, and He’s already at work in her heart. We’re not asking you to give up on her, but we are asking you to stop carrying her burden alone. Lift it to the Lord together, pray for her like she’s your sister in Christ, not your enemy. Ask God to soften her heart, but also ask Him to give you patience to wait for it. You’ve shown incredible grace; now trust Him to handle the timing.

And to your child, oh, we’re praying for them like they’re our own. They’re seeing a parent who’s hurting, and we don’t want them to grow up thinking love is conditional or that pain is normal. Surround them with truth, with stability, with people who will tell them, "Your dad is fighting for you, and God is fighting for you too." Let them hear you pray for them, even if it’s just simple, honest words: "Lord, help me love my child like You do." That’s the kind of legacy they’ll remember.

Now, about speaking truth in love, you’re right to want to do it well. But here’s what we’re sensing: sometimes the best "truth" in this moment isn’t a lecture or a confrontation, but a life lived so full of Jesus that her eyes can’t help but follow. You don’t have to have all the answers. You just have to keep pointing her to Him. And when words are hard, pray for wisdom to know when to speak and when to walk away. The Spirit will guide you.

We’re also praying for you, your heart, your strength, your ability to keep going. You’re not just enduring; you’re advancing the kingdom in this season. But we don’t want you to do it in your own power. Ask God to give you rest, to remind you that His grace is enough. And when you’re tired, when you don’t know what to say, just be His presence for her. Sometimes that’s louder than words.

Let’s pray this together right now:

"Father, we thank You for this man who’s fighting for his family with a heart that’s still trusting You. You see the pain, the longing, the love, and we’re asking You to meet him in the midst of it. Soften her heart, Lord, but don’t let us forget that You’re the one who changes hearts. Give him wisdom to know how to speak, how to love, how to wait. And protect his child, let them know they’re safe, they’re seen, and they’re loved, no matter what. Fill him with Your peace, Your strength, and Your words when he doesn’t know what to say. And Lord, use this season to draw her to You, not to break him. In Jesus’ name, we declare it. Amen."

We’re with you, every step, every prayer, every weary moment. Keep going. He’s not done with you yet.

 

[EnricoLange]

I prayed for this request in Jesus Name.

 

[Jonathan_M]

I prayed for this in Jesus Name.

 

[Windwold]

Praying with you for this in Jesus' name, Amen

 

[usha rani]

I prayed for this request in Jesus Name.

 

[The Encourager]

May God in Jesus' name answer your prayer request according to God's perfect love, wisdom, will, timing, grace, and mercy. God is so in love with you. Be Encouraged!

Psalm 37:4: Delight yourself in the Lord, And He shall give you the desires of your heart.
Matthew 6:33: But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.

Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. Thank You for loving me, Jesus. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. God bless me to prosper, walk in excellent health, and never stop growing in the love, grace, and knowledge of Christ Jesus. God bless me to know You in truth, fall in love with You with all my heart, mind, soul, body, and strength and never fall out of love with You. Bless me to have an ever growing closer stronger, more intimate relationship with You. Bless me with the love, desire, strength, and the spirit of obedience to always delight myself in You, seek first Your kingdom, Your righteousness, and to always respect and obey You. Bless me to trust You with all my heart, acknowledge You in all my ways, and lean not to my own understanding. Bless me with knowledge, wisdom, and understanding in all You have called me to do.

God heal me in every area of my life. Deliver and cleanse me of everything in my life that doesn't honor You. Transform and renew my mind. Bless me with love, power, and a sound mind. Let the mind that is in Christ Jesus be in me. Bless me to have and operate with a God solution focused heart, mind, spirit, and attitude. Bless me to have a God Kingdom Culture Mentality. God be with me as a mighty warrior. Let no weapon formed against me prosper. Protect me from all the plans of my enemies and the plans of the enemy of my soul. God, all that I have asked of You, in this prayer, please do the same for the writer of the prayer, all those who love and care about me, and all those I love and care about. God, please forever honor this prayer over each of our lives. God Thank You. Amen, so be it by faith, and by faith, it is so. Prayer written by The Encourager-Prayer Warrior-Board Certified Professional Christian Life Coach. www.theencourager.net

Heal Me Lord Jesus Spirit, Soul, And Body​

Healed Spirit Soul And Body

be-an-encourager.blogspot.com