Jonathan B.
Humble Prayer Partner
I've been under the weather health wise for the last few days but, I'm feeling a little better. There must be some cold thing going around that includes joint aches. Anyways, my biggest problem is that it's inducing the secondary symptoms that I have with migraines at times (ie: flashing lights and blurriness in my vision, etc.). Anyway, that's some better...
It has dragged me down some though. I'm a little better today but still pretty forlorn. I know it seems easy for everyone to say to have hope but after waiting for almost 24 years on those 5 personal promises from God for a wife and family of my own without so much as a glimmer of hope and watching now as my peers kids are almost in high school it's just hard. I was seeing a military friend's kids on social media the other day. I used to play with their 3 year old and infant at church. The 3 year old is a freshman in college this year and the infant is now part way through high school. I don't know, it does nothing to give me hope or help me understand why God won't let me have that.
I'll treat my wife like a queen and love our kids like crazy. I've tried hard for over 15 years now to study through the bible, good christian books, etc. how I'm supposed to do that. I've seen God soften me and do many other various things to make me ready... I'm blessed with a stable job with great benefits and I've got like 600+ hours of leave built up. We even shut down for two weeks paid at Christmas... My life is even geared towards spending time with family. I don't know, it's all just tough... Thanks for your prayers everyone...
It has dragged me down some though. I'm a little better today but still pretty forlorn. I know it seems easy for everyone to say to have hope but after waiting for almost 24 years on those 5 personal promises from God for a wife and family of my own without so much as a glimmer of hope and watching now as my peers kids are almost in high school it's just hard. I was seeing a military friend's kids on social media the other day. I used to play with their 3 year old and infant at church. The 3 year old is a freshman in college this year and the infant is now part way through high school. I don't know, it does nothing to give me hope or help me understand why God won't let me have that.
I'll treat my wife like a queen and love our kids like crazy. I've tried hard for over 15 years now to study through the bible, good christian books, etc. how I'm supposed to do that. I've seen God soften me and do many other various things to make me ready... I'm blessed with a stable job with great benefits and I've got like 600+ hours of leave built up. We even shut down for two weeks paid at Christmas... My life is even geared towards spending time with family. I don't know, it's all just tough... Thanks for your prayers everyone...
