We hear the weight of your heart in this request, and we are grateful you have brought these burdens before the Lord, for He alone is the one who redeems, forgives, and sets us free from the chains of our past. You have called upon the name of Jesus Christ, and that is the only name under heaven by which we can be saved, for Scripture declares, *"There is salvation in no one else, for there is no other name under heaven that is given among men, by which we must be saved!"* (Acts 4:12, WEB). It is through His blood that we find mercy, and it is in His name that we boldly approach the throne of grace to receive help in our time of need.
First, let us address the confession of your words and actions in elementary school. The Bible teaches us that *"the tongue is a fire, the very world of iniquity... it defiles the whole body, and sets on fire the course of nature, and is set on fire by Gehenna"* (James 3:6, WEB). If you spoke someone’s name in a way that mocked or hurt them, that was indeed wrong, and it is right for you to bring this before the Lord in repentance. However, we must also remember that *"if we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous to forgive us the sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness"* (1 John 1:9, WEB). Childhood mistakes, though they may have had consequences, are not beyond the reach of God’s grace. If you have repented, He has forgiven you. What you must now do is release the guilt and shame to Him, for *"there is therefore now no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus, who don’t walk according to the flesh, but according to the Spirit"* (Romans 8:1, WEB). The enemy may try to bring up these memories to accuse you, but you must stand firm in the truth that *"as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us"* (Psalm 103:12, WEB).
Now, we must address the troubling words in your request about "slaughters" and "revenge." These are not the heart of Christ, who said, *"But I tell you, don’t resist him who is evil; but whoever strikes you on your right cheek, turn to him the other also"* (Matthew 5:39, WEB) and *"Love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who mistreat you and persecute you"* (Matthew 5:44, WEB). Vengeance belongs to the Lord alone, as it is written: *"Don’t seek revenge yourselves, beloved, but give place to God’s wrath. For it is written, 'Vengeance belongs to me; I will repay, says the Lord'"* (Romans 12:19, WEB). If you have harbored bitterness, anger, or desires for retaliation—even in your heart—you must repent of this immediately. These feelings are not from God but from the enemy, who seeks to destroy you through unforgiveness and hatred. Ask the Lord to replace these feelings with His love and peace, for *"the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faith, gentleness, and self-control"* (Galatians 5:22-23, WEB). If there are those who have wronged you, pray for them, bless them, and release them to God. He is the just Judge, and He will handle all things in His perfect timing and wisdom.
You also mentioned the "mirror abomination where the women are reminders of my past." We do not fully understand what you mean by this, but if you are struggling with lust, impurity, or being triggered by memories of past sins—especially sexual immorality—you must take this seriously before the Lord. Jesus said, *"But I tell you that everyone who gazes at a woman to lust after her has committed adultery with her already in his heart"* (Matthew 5:28, WEB). If this is a battle for you, you must flee from it, for *"flee sexual immorality! 'Every sin that a man does is outside the body,' but he who commits sexual immorality sins against his own body. Or don’t you know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. Therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s"* (1 Corinthians 6:18-20, WEB). You cannot entertain these thoughts or dwell on these struggles alone. You must bring them into the light, confess them to God, and seek accountability with mature believers who can help you walk in purity. If you are being tempted, *"submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you"* (James 4:7, WEB).
Lastly, we want to encourage you with the truth that in Christ, you are a new creation. *"Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old things have passed away. Behold, all things have become new"* (2 Corinthians 5:17, WEB). The past does not define you if you are in Jesus. He has set you free from the law of sin and death, and you are no longer a slave to fear, guilt, or shame. *"For you didn’t receive the spirit of bondage again to fear, but you received the Spirit of adoption, by whom we cry, 'Abba! Father!'"* (Romans 8:15, WEB). Walk in this freedom, brother. Do not let the enemy drag you back into the chains of condemnation. Instead, fix your eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of your faith, *"who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising its shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God"* (Hebrews 12:2, WEB).
Let us pray for you now:
Heavenly Father, we lift up our brother to You, knowing that You are the God of all comfort, redemption, and restoration. Lord, we thank You that he has called upon the name of Jesus, the only name by which we are saved. We ask that You would wash him clean from every sin, every wrong word spoken in childhood, and every impurity that has lingered in his heart. Father, where there has been guilt or shame, we ask that You would replace it with the full assurance of Your forgiveness and love. Break the power of the enemy who seeks to accuse him and remind him of a past that You have already redeemed.
Lord, we rebuke any spirit of bitterness, anger, or vengeance in his heart. Fill him instead with Your love, Your peace, and Your desire for reconciliation. Help him to forgive those who have wronged him, just as You have forgiven him. Remove from him any desire for revenge, and let him trust in Your justice and timing.
We also pray for purity in his mind and heart. If he is struggling with lust or impure thoughts, we ask that You would give him the strength to flee from temptation and to walk in the light. Surround him with godly brothers who can hold him accountable and encourage him in righteousness. Let him meditate on whatever is true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, and commendable (Philippians 4:8).
Father, we declare that he is a new creation in Christ. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. Let him walk in the freedom and victory that Jesus purchased for him on the cross. Guard his heart and mind in Christ Jesus, and let him experience Your peace that surpasses all understanding.
We ask all these things in the mighty and holy name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior. Amen.
Prayer Focus: God, Thank You for loving me. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name please bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. 
